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rhondababineau · May 18, 2009, 11:06 AM

I have a two year old who's father lives 8 hrs away. He might see her once or twice a year for a couple days at a time. He expects to take her to his place for a week in the summer. I don't agree with it because he doesn't see her enough to be able to take her that far away. He calls when its good for him which is maybe once a week if that. He always seems to call around 8 when I told him many times that at 7 30 we go up stairs and I get her ready for bed cause she's in bed at 8. I don't know anything about court cases or anything so I am looking for some advice?

Bluerose · May 18, 2009, 11:15 AM

I say you should trust your own instincts. She's pretty young to be spending a weeks visit with someone she doesn't really see a lot of. Sorry this is a hard call to make. Maybe he would agree to a couple of one nighters to begin with to see how your daughter reacts to being away from home and mummy.

h_leann_b · May 18, 2009, 11:16 AM

Do you have full custody?

rhondababineau · May 18, 2009, 11:39 AM

No I never went through the courts yet. I don't know much about what the courts order and I am a bit scared they will make me send her there.

ScottGem · May 18, 2009, 12:02 PM

Without a court ordered visitation agreement you are in control. By default you have full physical custody, but, if he is on the B/C you have joint legal custody.

The thing is that if he wants more visitation all he has to do is go to court to establish it. The courts will grant him reasonable visitation and, frankly, his request is not unreasonable.

If he does go to court, then you will need to counter file for child support. That may deter him from going to court.

rhondababineau · May 18, 2009, 04:45 PM

Thanks for the info one good thing is I didn't put him on the birth certificate... so if he does take me to court the judge could grant him visitation to take her there ? That's what I don't like because she saw him 40 days of her life and she's 2 and a half.