[freaktrain0048]

Is it OK for a 13 year old female to be dating a senior in high school who is 18 as long as it doesn't turn sexually??

[Gemini54]

I think that this thread has been repeated elsewhere.

The short answer is NO.

He should be dating girls his own age.

[Clough]

Hi, freaktrain0048!

Yes, you can date and be friends. However, five years difference in age is quite a spread in years at your ages developmentally speaking. He's presumably getting ready to move on with his life with either college or work, and you have a lot of secondary education years to yet go through.

Is there not someone closer to your age in whom you might be interested?

Thanks!

[Nestorian]

Dating often leads to sex, perhaps you'd be better off dating some one your own age, rather than playing the odds with some one else's future.

Try to remember, there will always be more guys, probably better guys in college. Don't bank on what is here and now, when there is still a long life ahead of you.

Peace and kindness.

[kay84]

I can see yr point hun from both sides as I fell in love at 14 wiv a 19 yr old and we did do things but we never had sex till I was 16 n I don't mean the day I turned 16 he always said hed wait till I was ready and he did and we were together for 10 years .if that is the case wiv you then if that's what you both won't and you don't have sex then its up to you but bin a mum now I would like to now if this is how my girl felt I do think you should talk wiv yr mum over it you never no she mite have a story of her own hun take care and b careful in what you do xx

[Silverfoxkit]

You two are on opposite ends of the spectrum. You are just now becoming a teenager, you're young and your hormones are going crazy and you are a long ways from finding yourself.

He, on the other hand, is a legal adult. As an adult male His emotions, needs and desires are are a completely different field then you are on. A mature 18 year old male should not be interested in a child, I'm sorry but you are a child, in any intimate manner.

It may be hard for you to comprehend but at your ages that 5 years makes an incredible difference.

If the relationship becomes physical it is very illegal and yes you will eventually get caught. Even if you manage to date him for years as long as he is over the age limit and you are under is it statutory rape. He will carry the label of "child molester" for the rest of his life. He will be publicly listed as an offender. He will have trouble even getting a decent job with a label like that.

You may feel like you "love" him, but if you truly care about this guy then you will not get involved in a relationship with him and jeopardize yourself and his entire future.

Please reconsider and find a boy your own age.

[ChihuahuaMomma]

As far as the OP and the question. YES I do think there is something wrong here. I think that its completely normal for you to have a crush on an older guy, but for him to see you as a dating option doesn't say much for his character and decision making process of a legal adult. What do your parents think about this?

[Nestorian]

To the OP, give it time and maybe a better situation will come along. You know what they say, "the best things in life are worth waiting for."

Peace and kindness.

[Stinker10]

There is nothing illegal in seeing someone 18 if you are 13. It does become illegal if it turns sexual - and that involve just touching you sexually. But such a relationship does beg a few questions. An 18-year-old has lived a lot mopre than someone who is 13 and is an adult under the law. Surely he should be more interested in people his own age? He is more mature and I would advise that any relationship is likely to end in tears - your tears. He will soon tire of someone who cannot relate to an 18-year-old. I would ditch him before you get the chance to get hurt.

[jenniepepsi]

HMM... This has gotten out of hand. The thread has been completely taken over by a completely unrelated topic. Not very nice for the OP



Freaktrain0048,

While its perfectly normal for a girl your age to be interested in older guys due to your hormones developing and your increasing interest in boys and dating, You need to stop and think, why is this ADULT, interested in a CHILD. This is dangerous grounds and it wouldn't take very much for it to turn Illigal. Your still young and your hormones are raging and rampant, and even a sweet innocent first kiss is ILLIGAL for him.

My advice hon, is to NOT date him. Be friends. Stay friends. Be the BEST of friends. And if you both still feel the same way when you are older then I am happy for you :)

If he is a responsible adult who really and genuenly wants to be with you, then he should be the a responsible adult and wait for you to be old enough to understand relationships and love better.


Best of luck my dear :)

[talaniman]

You can be friends and have fun, but anything physical can land him in jail. Rule of thumb, your parents are the law and make the rules of what they think you can do, and who you do what with. You can't go wrong by obey the law they set down. Talk to them.

[JudyKayTee]

Here's a post from the legal thread - 16 years old and 19 years old. OP should read what happened here.

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/crimin...er-354136.html

[Sphira]

I totally think that this is wroung to date a guy that much olders than you and to see you as datable for him is sick but sweet listen the guy my sister is dating is six years older that her but she is turning 19 and he's turning 25 but they both want a future you know kids money house and more marrige even but bub you donnot have the same values as hinm he's looking future your looking for fun

I wouldent do's it but the decision is yours to make we are only here to help

[ScottGem]

Sphira;the guy my sister is dating is six years older that her but she is turning 19 and he's turning 25

Many of us keep saying this. As you grow older age gaps matter less and less. When both parties are adults, it hardly matters. But when one is an adult and the other is not, it matters greatly.