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    peaceofmind2009's Avatar
    peaceofmind2009 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    May 12, 2009, 11:57 AM
    Why is silent after being caught cheating?
    A little over a week ago I found out my boyfriend of 8 months cheated on me. He and I had never had any problems in our relationship until 1 month ago to the day! We have been on two trips since we started dating, and we get alone great no argument or nothing. I cann say was truly my best friend. We spent all of our time together when off from work. He works graveyard shift so we never miss a day talking I stay up way after midnite and talk to him at least until 3 or 4 in the morning while he is at work. About 3 months. Into our relationship he started receiving calls from his ex girlfriend and he would tell me about the messages she was leaving. She said she had something to talk to him about but she needed to do it face to face. He ask my advice and I said do it. After the meeting he called and told me she said her 3 yr old daughter is his. He had a dna test and it turned out to be so. Since then she has been calling constantly. We decided to take our relatioship to the next level and move in together, so he moved his stuff in 3 weeks ago. Only to move part of it out a week in a half later because he was living with his mom and 16yr old son and he said that right now his mom is not financially able to pay everything and raise his son on his own. His mom has custody of his son. I over heard a conversation with him and his daughters mom and he was pretty much telling her he was going to be with her. I confontedhim and he said he was just pulling her chain so he could see his daughter for her be day in a few days from then. I had already filled out papers for court so he could establish a parental relationship through mediation because she wouldn't let him se the little girl unless she was present. She wanted him back is why she said if he wanted a relationship with his daughter he has to be with her. He told me the court papers would take longer then a week so he would not be able to see his daughter. I stood by him ans believed him. On Saturday may 2nd , I told him my daughter was going to be gone for the weekend and we should spend time together. He said he was going to a friends party he will have to see me Sunday. A friend called me and said he seen him going in a motel. I thought it was strange so I called the motel and asked for him by name and they tranfered me to his room and he answered I asked him if I was jumping to conclusions now and he said what I guess he hadn't caught my voice when I asked again he hung up. I have not heard from him since and I haven't called him either. My question is why have he not called?
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
     
    #2

    May 12, 2009, 12:04 PM

    He's got WAY TOO MUCH baggage.

    I know that this might not be what you want to hear, but you need to get out of this relationship. He's got so many other priorities (16-year old son, now a 3-year old daughter). It's time for you to move on with your life. Leave him alone to sort out his issues. You need to get on with your life and find someone who doesn't have so much baggage.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
    Uber Member
     
    #3

    May 12, 2009, 01:36 PM

    He hasn't called because he doesn't have anything to say -

    I'm sorry.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #4

    May 13, 2009, 09:55 AM

    He is BUSTED, and needs some time to come up with an excuse you will believe. You aren't that dumb are you?

    Disappear from his life, its probably all been a lie.
    88sunflower's Avatar
    88sunflower Posts: 1,207, Reputation: 462
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    #5

    May 13, 2009, 10:04 AM
    He is maybe afraid to call because you will be all over his butt about it and now he can't lie. Just move on. As hard as it is, move on and be over it. He proved himself to you.

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