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    sebastian101's Avatar
    sebastian101 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    May 5, 2009, 10:47 AM
    How to get over marriage phobia
    Hi
    Im an Indian & right now trying to go in for an arranged marriage, as per our traditions.

    Im finding it too hard to commit to an unknown girl & fear of losing my freedom & happiness for good if I marry any girl.

    It may be because of my past failed relationship with my ex girl friend.

    Please suggest me how do I get over this fear & happily stay with a girl whom I marry.

    Thanks
    Meredith1978's Avatar
    Meredith1978 Posts: 120, Reputation: 9
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    May 7, 2009, 05:34 AM

    You just have to choose it. So many times people think relationships just end because of a shift in the sun moon and stars and it isn't. It ends because we leave the option for it to end.

    When you marry this girl arranged or not, you need to choose to take failure off the table. Become her friend and let her be yours, find out what she needs to be happy and let her know what you need.

    You need to know where the line is that shouldn't be crossed and she needs to know yours, so that each of you know what must be done to respect the other person. With respect, with friendship, love is easy.

    Honestly I think it might be easier for you with an arranged marriage because upfront you can't have any unusual expectations. You will only know her as your wife and she will only know you as her husband instead of finding out that either of you tolerated something in the hopes that it would change when you got married.

    Marriage is work and it will not fail if both of you commit to success
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #3

    May 9, 2009, 01:39 PM

    Don't get married until your ready with the right female.

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