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tlhall · May 5, 2009, 12:51 PM

I have a 15 year old daughter. Her natural father and I divorced when she was 2 and he has not seen her nor have I gone after him for child support. After we divorced he as been in prison a few times and I would have rather my child not have anything to do with him when she was younger(and he did not want anything to do with her as well). So I re married when she was around 4 and when she started school she used my current husbands (her stepfather's last name) and she has ever since. Her biological father's last name is on her birth certificate and SS card and we only use her "real" last name on tax filing. Now she is of age to obtain a DL and in a few years she will go to college. I need to know what and how is the cheapest way to change her birth father's name to reflect the last name she has been using all her known life. Her birth father is lords know where and has never even contacted her. By the way, she does know her stepdad is not her real father and that her real father wants nothing to do with her.

stevetcg · May 5, 2009, 12:57 PM

There are procedures each court establishes for finding missing parents to allow for a step parent adoption or legal name change (which comes along with step parent adoption)

Your best bet would be to find a local family law lawyer as an adoption is a complicated procedure and making one little mistake might give grounds to invalidate it later in life.

Meredith1978 · May 6, 2009, 08:58 AM

It might be easier to file for the name change first and the adoption as a separate proceeding. You have a good reason for the name change and a lot of states (I'm sure not all) don't require much more than a valid reason.

Synnen · May 6, 2009, 09:09 AM

You need the LEGAL father's permission (in this case, the biological father) to do a stepparent adoption OR a legal name change.

My advice is to get a lawyer and start the process of getting your ex's rights terminated, either voluntarily or involuntarily.

I would ALSO sit down with your daughter and tell her the truth. If she finds out from someone else, she's going to be really ticked at you--and really really hurt.