[smoothy]

That is a fair comment.
I guess I just took it as "all the time"

And you are right about the resentment.

Yes... after all how many women who whine about porn spend the ENTIRE DAY at the Shopping mall just looking around? I'll bet more than a few.

[Gemini54]

Some people need harsh. I hear too many women just nagging someone they claim to care about to death then complain about the resulting lack of sex. Young people in particular. THey see nothing wrong with deciding how, what, and how often their partner should be allowed to do anything, yet would get their panties in a knot of that was turned around on them....and yes I do mean EITHER the guy or girl doing it.

Now I am not pointing the finger at either party here... I think they very well both may be antagonizing the other, and both may be arrogant enough to think they can do anything they want and say anything they want while the other person can't.

The fact is he is an adult...and he is entitled to his share of "My space" where she isn't entitled to stick her nose into. He isn't cheating. And twice a day looking at porn isn't an addiction. Would going to two stores looking at shoes be a addiction for her? Would her watching a girl show on TV an equal amount of time be an addiction?

I'm not saying he can't get addicted (or that he is completely free of blame)....anyone might get addicted to anything out there. What I am seeing is another paranoid woman that rather than deal with her own insecurities about herself instead choses to destroy a relationship by micromanaging what HE can look at and when. We are hearing only her viewpoint, not his....thus it may be colored with her own misperceptions or pregjustices.

And like you said....communications is never a bad thing. But ranting and complaining isn't communications. Being calm and rational (and be willing to listen) when one talks IS what communications is all about. Not just flapping ones gums.

Sorry Smoothy, but I think that you're going a 'bit over the top here'.

... paranoid woman... insecurities... micromanaging??

These are your assumptions, and your projections I might add.

Give the poor woman a break - she's 21, she anxious, she's learning about her sexuality and his.

Sometimes compassion is more appropriate than harshness.

[450donn]

Amazing how the subject gets turned around to something it is not.
Back on topic.

You need to educate yourself about porn and porn addiction. Many on here poo poo the idea that porn is the number one addiction in the country today and that is their right. But if you do a search on either the web or here and read all about how many people are seriously concerned about the use of porn in their relationships it just might wake you up. If it bothers you enough to come on this forum and ask, it is a problem. He needs to understand that it is becoming a problem. You need to understand that it is not your fault. It is his problem, and unless and until he is willing to face the problem head on and deal with it there is no chance for you. Like with any addiction it will ultimately kill your relationship, so maybe you need to take a real hard look and decide if this guy is worth it or not.

[Synnen]

Whether it is an addiction needs to be diagnosed by a SPECIALIST.

All the OP can decide is whether she can live with the current use of porn by her boyfriend.

Once again, this has become a debate of 'good' versus 'evil' with porn as the subject.

The OP hasn't been back since March.

Take further discussion regarding porn and it's evils or benefits to the Members discussions boards.

This thread is closed.