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    blue_st4r's Avatar
    blue_st4r Posts: 59, Reputation: 0
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    #1

    Apr 19, 2009, 04:21 AM
    Not ready for my 21st birthday.
    My 21st birthday is coming up in a months time. My friends are behind to have party.
    Im depressed and not interested in celebrating 21 years of my life. Also I think that my anxiety is going to kick in at the party looking at all the people focusing their attention on me. I don't like being put on the spotlight.

    I just want to go to university and carry on with the day. Im not even slightly excited that my birthday is coming. For me to have this party will mean that I really have to step out of my comfort zone. My parents and friends think Im being naïve and .

    Please adivce.
    shazamataz's Avatar
    shazamataz Posts: 6,642, Reputation: 1244
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    #2

    Apr 19, 2009, 04:35 AM

    If you don't want to have a party you don't have to. It's your big day!

    You could just have a small gathering rather than a party, have a few close friends and family over and have a barbecue :)
    That's what I did for my 21st as I was the same, didn't really want to have a party so we went and played miniature golf (lol) and went back for a few drinks.
    blue_st4r's Avatar
    blue_st4r Posts: 59, Reputation: 0
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    #3

    Apr 19, 2009, 04:39 AM

    Yea, I don't even want that. I just want to be in my room. I want to avoid the get together thing. I don't want to piss my friends off at the same time.. :(
    shazamataz's Avatar
    shazamataz Posts: 6,642, Reputation: 1244
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    #4

    Apr 19, 2009, 04:48 AM

    Why are you feeling so bad about turning 21?
    Is it just the age thing or something a bit deeper?
    albear's Avatar
    albear Posts: 1,594, Reputation: 222
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    #5

    Apr 20, 2009, 05:17 PM

    Blue st4r, no worries its just a day :), I feel the same way about my 21st coming up this year, and I've already been asked what I'm going to do, replied nothing and had the strange looks they give you, but no matter what happens in the end weather you have a little get togeather or not just remember its only going to be one day :)
    jjwoodhull's Avatar
    jjwoodhull Posts: 1,378, Reputation: 239
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    #6

    Apr 20, 2009, 05:29 PM
    If you are feeling depressed about getting older - it's natural. However, 21 is still really young and you still have the best of your life ahead of you.

    If you do not want a big party, be honest with your friends. Tell them that it would be more enjoyable for you to have an intimate dinner with just a few people. They will understand. And in the end, they will be happy that they didn't spend money on a big party that you wouldn't enjoy. Their intentions are to celebrate and make you happy. Not to make you miserable.
    JoeCanada76's Avatar
    JoeCanada76 Posts: 6,669, Reputation: 1707
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    #7

    Apr 20, 2009, 05:52 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by shazamataz View Post
    Why are you feeling so bad about turning 21?
    Is it just the age thing or something a bit deeper?
    I agree, I think there might be something more deeper to this issue. Not trying to be the alarmist but I do believe there are other things going on here as well. Just want to sit in the room and do nothing. Can you tell us what else is going on in your life right now. Must be going through a lot of changes, is this overwhelming you. Secluding yourself is not the answer either.

    Joe
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