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booberry23 · Apr 14, 2009, 10:01 AM

I had asked a question similar to this previously, but some things have changed.

My family moved to Texas 6 months ago. Things have become increasingly worse with my "wife" & I. I say "wife" because within this last year or so she informed that her divorce to her previous husband had not been finalized until 3 or 4 years after we were married. We are splitting, but she insists that we do not need to file for a divorce because our marriage license (in CA) is void. However, an attorney here says that our marriage will stand in court due to the length of time being together. I don't know what to do.

Also, I am moving out of state to return & be with family and friends. I have none here, and she makes my life a living hell. She does not (more like will not) work or help pay any of the bills. However, she refuses to leave and wants to stay here with the kids. How will leaving the state, even if it's only for a few months, effect a custody hearing? I would love to have my kids with me, or at least have physical custody of some, but I don't think a judge would split up the kids. I'm the one who pays the bills and supports them, why shouldn't I have custody?

Bsmom · Apr 14, 2009, 02:50 PM

This is very complicated, similar to my situation from 4 years ago. With no court order, you are free to move, but if you leave your children for more than a certain length of time, the court can find that you've "abandoned" them. If you can take them w/you, I would strongly advise you do that before any court order is in place.

cdad · Apr 14, 2009, 06:50 PM

Mostly its going to depend on the actual status of her previous marriage as to the status of your own marriage. Another thing is this is not the time to be leaving. You need to finish this because in leaving you could distance yourself from the children and therefore lose the custody you seek. The fact that your paying the bills has nothing to do with the custody. Best is to settle things first and them later make plans that are in the best interest of the children

Fr_Chuck · Apr 14, 2009, 07:38 PM

You would want to have the "marriage" annulled on the grounds that she was not legally able to enter into the marriage, you want that on record to clear the marriage from appearing valid.

The issue of child custody and support are ones that need to be solved and considered