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joecool75 · Apr 10, 2009, 02:04 PM

My really good friend and I are both infatuated with this girl. She has always seemed more interested in him but they aren't in a relationship. I don't want to fight my friend for her (emotionally not phisically), or that could ruin my friendship with him, but I don't want to just give up.

I sometimes want to just be nice and help him get the girl because I feel she likes him better, but I can't help how I feel. Do I fight for her attention and risk hurting my friendship, or give up and help him get the girl so at least I keep my friendship and she is happy?

redhed35 · Apr 10, 2009, 02:12 PM

Hey,you don't say what age you are,but you know your friendship is important to you,if she goes for your friend,YOU still have a friend. There are always other girls,good friends are hard to come by.

I know you like her,its hard,but what's more important to you?
Your friend,or a girl?

joecool75 · Apr 10, 2009, 02:17 PM

Im 16, and yes I realize that my friendship is something more important than some high school date. It's just weird because I have never liked a girl like this. This is a girl that I like for her personallity and not just looks, I actually enjoy her as a person. I discussed it with him and we both feel like this. I just don't feel like I should just sit down and not try..

redhed35 · Apr 10, 2009, 02:20 PM

Have you talked to your friend about this?

Would he step down?

joecool75 · Apr 10, 2009, 02:26 PM

Yes we have, that's how we found out that we both have those feelings, and I feel he feels just like I do about her. I told him I felt like I should step down because she seems to favor him Ex: hugging him first(always), looking at him when we're in a group. My friend however never said anything about him stepping down. I just don't feel like I should just give up. There was one momnent where I realized I felt like that about her and I know the same thing could happen to her even though it seems like she likes my friend better.

redhed35 · Apr 10, 2009, 02:29 PM

There's a saying ,alls fair in love and war.

If your both vying for her attention,may the best man win.

However,I would suggest you make it clear to your friend your intentions.

joecool75 · Apr 10, 2009, 02:37 PM

So if I tell him that I'm not going to back down. I just have to tell him that I'm fine with us competing, just don't put each other down to to look better in front of the girl because that's what will kill our friendship. That actually sounds like an OK solution. I just hope something doesn't happen that does hurt our friendship... Thanks, I'd appreciate any other insight on this because I have never been in a love triangle... it sucks

artlady · Apr 10, 2009, 02:38 PM

Good friends are hard to come by but ,girls,well they tend to come and go.
Its kind of a moot point until you ask her who she likes more.
She should be the one who makes the decision,that way ,the friendship stays intact.

joecool75 · Apr 10, 2009, 02:42 PM

I understand about the girls coming and going, If it was any other girl I wouldn't care but like I said this isn't just another phisical atraction like it has always been, he and I both actually like her for her personality which is weird for me.

Flame dude · Apr 10, 2009, 06:48 PM

Take her out someplace make her feel speacial

talaniman · Apr 11, 2009, 12:16 PM

No need to keep posting your question all over the forum as they will be deleted as duplicate posts