[basketballlover]

When I was about 3 years old my mom and my dad splitand my dad moved out of the province. When I was 6 my mom married my stepdad. I have a half-brother that is 7 years younger than me and a half-sister that is 9 years younger than me. When I was about 11 I started arguing with my stepdad and mother. We had been fighting for a while when one day my stepdad slapped me across the face. Over the next 3 years it had been getting worse. My mother used to dig her nails into my arm and slap me. As well as that she used to put me down. I used to be treated like dirt. There was one night when we got into an argument and my stepdad told me to go down on my knees for 1 hour. Halfway through I started to feel dizzy and sway. So I leaned on the counter. My mom and stepdad start yelling at me telling me I was a bad actress and started hitting me. So I straightened up. Next thing I know I'm lying on the floor with them hitting me and yelling at me. That night was the night I told my parents and dad I wanted to move with my dad. Meanwhile, during my childhood my dad kept making promises he wouldn't keep. And because I was always fighting with my other parents I pictured my dad as my idol. When I finally moved in with my dad I learnt things about him that broke my heart. My dad had manipulated me by telling me lies about my other parents (often the bitterness I felt towards them only increased the fighting). He brings me down but always telling me he is superior and that I didn't know anything. I also found out that he is an alcoholic. Not the very dangerous kind that gets aggressive but the kind the can't stop drinking. I've been considering moving back with my mom and stepdad but I don't really want to go back to the environment there. At the same time I don't know if I should stay with my dad. What should I do?

[DoulaLC]

I'd go for option number 3... find one if you can. How old are you? Do you have any other family members you could stay with if you aren't old enough to be on your own? Do you have any friends you could stay with? Are you old enough to move out and get a place with a friend or two? Are you in school? Is there a teacher, counselor, neighbor, friend's parent, who you feel you could open up to and share this with?

IF it comes down to having to stay with one parent or another, choose the one that you could avoid getting into it with the easiest... from what you have shared, I would think it would be your father as your mother and stepfather are downright abusive (deciding to contact authorities for that situation is something else you will have to consider, keep in mind the odds are if it happens to you, it happens to your younger siblings... so you might just be protecting them as well). Bide your time until you can move out on your own or with friends. Make a plan that you can work towards. Get a job if you don't have one, stash most of your money away. Depending on your age, consider going to college, if you aren't already, and apply for scholarships to that you can leave and live on campus.
You need a trusted adult that you can confide in.

[basketballlover]

I'm not yet old enough to move out. I'm only 15. I don't know who I can move in with because I don't who I would be able to trust. Thanks for the advice.

[JoeCanada76]

Both physical abuse and mental, emotional abuse is just as bad or can be worse. Honestly the abuse you had to indure is bad, very bad. It was not right and should not have happened. There are many resources and other places where you can seek help in order to get out of each experience. Get out of the abuse but in my own opinion it sounds as if your better off with your dad.

Your mom and step dad are brutal. Stay away from them please. For your own safety.

Joe