[Ashley Doll]

I'm a sophomore in college, and my boyfriend is just about to graduate in May. We have been dating for two years and I have been dealing with the fact that he is leaving, but that isn't the part that is bothering me. What is really bothering me is his parents don't know how serious we have been, for example I asked him to come to church with me on ash Wednesday and his mother said to him "wow, yall are getting pretty serious since your going to church with her?" he then replied "no, one of the guys on the team asked me to go and i invited her," and clearly it was just him and I that went. My feelings were hurt, but when I brought it up he just changed the subject. It happens a lot when we go out on dates together, visiting for christmas, etc. I feel like he is afraid to let his parents know what he feels because they support him financially, but I have been supporting him to. He was planning on staying and double majoring but he is to scared to say anything to his parents, I feel like I'm coming to a dead end. Should I get out? Or should I deal with being hidden away in a long distance relationship?

[margdav86]

Hi. Getting out and dealing with being in the closet are two extremes, and your options here are not limited to one or the other. It sounds like this has been going on for a while... and you need to step up to him and challenge it. What does financial support have to do with it? He doesn't want to tell his parents because taking that step in a relationship requires serious consideration about the other person. You need to ask him, straight up, what he wants out of the relationship.. are you guys going to be together when he moves away for college? If yes, tell him you need to have a place in his life that goes beyond just you two... tell him that it's important for him to introduce you to the family because you're an important part of his life.. don't let him change the subject and if he does, just tell him that you are not going to speak with him until he has a valid reason as to why he's keeping you in the dark.. . because those actions only communicate that he is not seriously considering you for the future. And if this is so, let him go! Who needs a guy that is not going to hold you up on a pedestal for everyone to see? You need to be with someone who is going to hold your hand and tell his family, this is MY GIRL.

[talaniman]

Can't believe you haven't talked this out. I know its hard when someone changes the subject, but maybe he isn't as serious about you as you are him. Better find out now before you continue to support him. He talks to you or you leave.

It's a real big RED FLAG when partners are not communicating.

[Romefalls19]

All I have to say is

No communication makes for no relationship