[worried wife]

My Husband called and reported his ex-wife for physically abusing him but never pressed charges which he now regrets.She has both physically and mentally abused him in their nine year marriage.He has been divorced since 2004,is he still able for compensation since she is still making him feel guilty for not taking the children when she wants him to and for telling the children lies about the both of us and then the children coming to us about them.Is that not considered mental abuse still?

[this8384]

Unfortunately, your husband's ex-wife sounds just like every other ex-wife out there. The mind games and bad mouthing are all too common these days after a couple splits up.

What type of compensation is your husband looking to get from her? Is there documentation of the physical abuse? To what extent did she physically abuse him?

[worried wife]

He is wanting custody of his two children and they want to live with us.She decided to dump anti-freeze and cat litter all over the garage as she screamed at him why don't you just leave and he kept telling her he would after he mowed the grass so then she started throwing zema bottles at his tractor and his car.Then she grabbed his glasses of his face broke them in half and threw them in the yard he then went into the house and called 911 as he was reporting this she was strangling him by the back of his shirt.But when the sheriff showed up he never pressed charges but gave a statement.So now regretting his actions I want to know if anything can be done even though this was almost 5 years ago?

[this8384]

You can try to get a copy of the police report. I'm surprised she wasn't charged with disorderly conduct; my husband's ex-wife showed up at his work a few years ago, was causing a scene, a co-worker called the police, they both got arrested, he got realized and she was charged with disorderly conduct. He didn't have to press charges; they automatically charged her with it.

[worried wife]

So what if she constantly calls his work.Like in his job it was mandatory for him to take one week of furlough a quarter because of the economy she starts calling his hr personnel to make sure she will still get her child support.Also this summer she did property damage at our house I called the sheriffs department they told me to take pictures then she did it again and my husband kicked rocks at her car,then he got charged with distraction of property.She kept threatening him with precessing charges unless we did exactly what she wanted so we did.Then when he was out of town the sheriff showed up at his work to arrest him because he was out of town and we could not take the kids when she demanded.Is she physco of is it just me?

[this8384]

I'm having a little trouble swallowing the bit about the sheriff showing up to arrest him for not taking the children. My apologies, but that doesn't happen. There are deadbeat parents around the world; they don't get arrested for not seeing their kids. Did you witness this firsthand or is this what your husband told you?

[worried wife]

She pressed charges on him for kicking rocks at her car.The charges were not pressed until he went out of town and could get the children then is when she pressed the charges on him for the rock situation.Witnessed it first hand because I was away for the military.I have been living this physcotic nightmare of his four five years.

[this8384]

So then he wasn't getting arrested for not taking the kids, he was getting arrested for damaging her property... correct? If you want accurate legal advice, you need to give us an accurate story with accurate history.

[Fr_Chuck]

Also if she is harassing him, calling work, he gets a restraining order to make her stop, that is very simple

Also it sounds like he is not sticking up for his rights, but also letting her play his temper, He needs to document everything, and report her and make sure his rights are protected

[worried wife]

I know all of this but she comes on our property and literally spins out in the drive and on our neighbors lawn the only thing the sheriff tells me to do is to take pictures.When he kicked rocks at her car on our property after she spun out again for the 7th time that week she went to the sheriffs and pressed charges but they would not do crap for us.The sheriff called and said if those two could work out the cost there would be no charges so he tried to work it out with her for a month and a half but every time we did not give in to her ridiculous demands she would say"I'll just have you arrested"for two months we heard that until she expected me to leave Indiana to drive back and get the kids knowing I could not because of being on military orders at the time that is when she sent the sheriffs to his work to have him arrested.Another time she kept calling us constantly and we were not talking to her she called the sheriffs and pressed phone harassment charges on us we did not even call her!

[this8384]

You've completely veered off from your original question and never answered mine. You started asking about her physically abusing him, then said he wants custody of the kids and are now trying to tell me that he was almost arrested almost 2 months later for kicking rocks at her car, which in itself is extremely childish and makes him just as bad as she is.

So what exactly are you looking for at this point? Compensation for physical abuse, which you still haven't answered whether he can prove? Change of custody, which I personally don't see benefitting the children whatsoever because they're the products of two children themselves? What advice are you seeking at this point?

[JudyKayTee]

First, what happens/happened between him and her has nothing to do with you. You have no legal standing. He is the only person who can stop her from abusing him and/or their children and/or threatening him. You are not the first nor will you be the last to deal with a crazy ex-spouse.

As far as her threats and abuse of YOU - get a protective order. Get it now.

Large sections of your story do not make sense but perhaps you are upset and not thinking clearly.

[worried wife]

I need advice as far as,what is the statute of limitation for spousal abuse in Ohio,and Yes his abuse was documented by the sheriff who came to the house and did the report.
Plus how long can a person push and push you on your property until you yourself did something.She came on our property and damaged it six times a week being told every time to stop and finally he kicked rocks back.Childish maybe but a person needs to protect there property,right?

[JudyKayTee]

The Statute may very well have little to do with this - the question is going to be whether he FORGAVE her for the abuse. Forgiveness comes in various ways, such as failure to press charges; sharing a bed; continuing to hold yourself out as a marital couple. I don't see the Sheriff accepting this filing because I think the abuse charge is retaliation for the rock kicking charge.

I think you are going to lose the argument that he was kicking rocks at her to protect his property.

And, again, you have no legal standing in this. If you want something done the next time she shows up and causes damage YOU file the charges against her.

[worried wife]

Actually the abuse happened 5 years prior to the rock kicking.

[this8384]

Actually the abuse happened 5 years prior to the rock kicking.

You're not understanding what Judy is saying. She's pointing out that he can't try to claim spousal abuse as he was willing to forgive her by staying married to her; if he tries to get her charged with it now, it's going to look like he made up a story out of revenge because she's pressing charges.

Separately, she's pointing out that kicking rocks is not defending his property. It's being foolish. She's not tying the spousal abuse to the rock-kicking.

Either way, you don't have a case for spousal abuse.

[worried wife]

So more or less we should deal with her shanangens until the youngest turns 18 years old,and just let this woman walk all over us.Even though when I started this session I stated he did not stay with her he left,separated moved into another place that day.

[this8384]

The problem lies in the fact that 5 years have gone by. And no, you never said he left her that same day; you said that she abused him during their nine years of marriage.

I might be mistaken, but I don't believe you answered my question so I'll ask it a 3rd time: is there documentation of the alleged abuse?

[JudyKayTee]

So more or less we should deal with her shanangens until the youngest turns 18 years old,and just let this woman walk all over us.Even though when I started this session I stated he did not stay with her he left,separated moved into another place that day.

Please do not get passive aggressive on us - you asked for legal advice. You received legal advice, advice BY THE LAW.

Your husband appears to have forgiven the abuse that happened five years ago. No matter what went on, you have no legal standing in that. I don't see him blameless - he's an adult, kicking stones to defend his property? No wonder the Police are tired of the whole bunch of you.

As far as now - get a restraining order against her. You get the order. Not him.

None of this advice meets with your approval. Why don't you tell us what you would like to hear and we'll work on that.

[worried wife]

Yes, he made a report to the sheriff that showed up at that house that day she was abusing him no he did not press charges he just left.