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Mac Lovin · Mar 3, 2009, 04:27 AM

Ok here it is I recently got back with my girlfriend of 4 years after a 9 week break apart which we both missed each other deeply however since we have been back about 2 months now I find myself doing all the work and she gets mad very easy.. Recently she broke down crying saying I deserve somebody better and that I am the nicest person in the world but lately she finds it hard to show emotion, I asked her did she want to break up and end it here now for good and she said no I don't, I have asked her this a few times since and she still tells me she loves me and that its me she wants to be with, however I'm finding it hard to understand this?

Help please?:confused:

is this right · Mar 3, 2009, 06:08 AM

I think you need to assess how the relationship was before the break, and reasons for the break.

From what you have said, I would say that her reaction now might be common of someone with low self esteem, and she may have convinced herself that she is not good enough for you. Her reaction is also common of someone who is in love with another person, but so afraid of losing them.

However having said all of this, you mention that you are now doing all the work.

If this is the case, and it is different to the way it used to be, you need to sit down and discuss how the relationship changed in the lead up to the brek. And how it has changed when comparing it now, to say, 2 years ago.

My concern for you would be that she cares deeply for you, and loves you, but maybe not in the sa,e way you feel for her. If that is the case maybe an extended/indefinate break would be best so you can both find your feet.

You can still occasionally meet up and chat after a couple months have past, and see whether it is worth talking about your feelings and or getting back together.

Good luck man

Mac Lovin · Mar 3, 2009, 06:11 AM

Originally Posted by is this right

I think you need to assess how the relationship was befor the break, and reasons for the break.

From what you have said, I would say that her reaction now might be common of someone with low self esteem, and she may have convinced herself that she is not good enough for you. Her reaction is also common of someone who is in love with another person, but so afraid of losing them.

However having said all of this, you mention that you are now doing all the work.

If this is the case, and it is different to the way it used to be, you need to sit down and discuss how the relationship changed in the lead up to the brek. And how it has changed when comparing it now, to say, 2 years ago.

My concern for you would be that she cares deeply for you, and loves you, but maybe not in the sa,e way you feel for her. If that is the case maybe an extended/indefinate break would be best so you can both find your feet.

You can still occassionally meet up and chat after a couple months have past, and see whether it is worth talking about your feelings and or getting back together.

Good luck man

What do you mean in love with somebody else?

is this right · Mar 3, 2009, 06:47 AM

Sorry,

When I said in love woth someone, I meant that in the third person, and was actually talking about you. i.e. she is in love with you.

I mean that she may be telling you the truth, and that she is totally in love with you, but is focused on losing you, rather than just enjoying the ride of the relationship. Sometimes this happens, and when someone realises what they have (you) is so good, they begin to think about what there life would be like without you, and start to focus on that rather than just enjoying the now.