[Changing09]

My boyfriend/fiance have been dating about 6 months. I'm pregnant and he's thrilled. We had problems regarding the pregnancy since I got pregnant. I wanted an abortion and he didn't want me to have one. I just knew it wasn't he's baby (thats why I wanted the abortiion, I just never told him that). So a couple days ago I went to get it and the doctor said I was at least 21 and 1/2 weeks. Further then I thought. She asked if I wanted to see the baby on the ultrasound and I said yes. When I saw the baby I just couldn't do it. So I didn't get the abortion. I came home and told my boyfriend I couldn't go through with it and he was so happy. So now I'm having a baby! But I still don't think its he's baby. I HAVE TO TELL HIM because he wants a dna test... he says not because he doesn't trust me but just for "peace of mind" (its he's first kid). I don't want him to find out its not he's then because that's a scene I don't want to see go down. By the way my boyfriend is 20 years older then me, not saying exact numbers but lets just say I haven't hit 20 yet... please don't judge, I'm not here for advice on that. My boyfriend and I have been through a lot, I got kicked out of my house for dating him and am currently living with him now. I'm just so scared to tell him but I have to. What do I say? How do I say "you might now be this baby father"?? I cheated on him early in the relationship, I didn't love him when I cheated but I know it still was wrong... but I do LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE him now. I don't think I can live without him. He's lost two girlfriends cheated on him and he broke with them... and one of those two they were dating for 10 year ( but the relationship was already over when he found out). We both feel the same way about each other and we both can't live without the other... we were meant to be. But I've already messed up a cramp load of times in this relationship ( not cheating but other stupid things I did) and I think telling him this would be he's last straw. How do I tell him without him leaving me?? Are there magic words I can say? Just need good SERIOUS advice asap. Please

[ChihuahuaMomma]

First of all it's HIS not he's.

Be honest. It's the right thing to do. Of course it won't be easy. But you have to tell him for your baby's sake. Your child deserves to be in a healthy environment when he/she is born and deserves to know who his/her father is.

[DoulaLC]

Your numbers are close enough, the baby might actually be his depending on when you started being intimate with each other. Also, dating a pregnancy is not an exact science, so the 21 and a half weeks could be off a bit.

If you feel there is absolutely no way the baby could be his, be honest and tell him that you dated someone else early in the relationship before things turned serious.

There is nothing you can do to make him stay, that will be his choice. Let him know you were scared to say anything, let him know you love him and want to be with him, and let him know you will be taking that DNA test when the baby is born, because you want your relationship with him to be one build on honesty and trust.

[kpangor]

Drop the bombshell girlie... spit the truth

[Maccaroni]

I'm afraid honey, that you have made your bed and you are going to have to lie in it. I know it is going to be hard, news like this is going to be very hard for him to take, but your going to have to tell him at some point and the longer you leave it the more stressed out you are going to get and that isn't good for the baby. If he has asked for the test there is a chance he suspects anyway. By deciding to keep this baby you have decided you are going to do this with or without him but you need to convince him that you desperately want to do it with him. Once he has all the information it is up to him if he loves you enough to stay in the relationship regardless but be prepared that even if he does forgive you it may take a while. As for your age, no-one would comment, provided you are over 16... but like you said that is not why you are here. Good luck, I hope you get the response you want. If not then I hope you have a back up plan to provide for your baby x

[Fr_Chuck]

Yes, you may just wait for the DNA test and see what it says

[drew_carey]

If you very sure it is not his baby:

Get an abortion. Tell him you had a miscarriage. Mate. Don't Cheat. Live Happily ever after.