[theneeds]

Everything was fine we just started getting really close to each other. When we first got together I was just messing around and that's all she was looking for. It's been over a year and now we are really close. I think that's what scares her. I told her I only wanted her to be happy even if it meant me in her life or not. Her words were "I do want you in my life i guess in just confused about what way ur in my life". What does that mean? I am a guy that will do just about anything for her but I just don't get her sometimes. I would love any help.

[neverme]

It sounds like she's lost the spark, to be honest.

Walk away. Keep your dignity intact and maybe she'll realise the mistake she's made... maybe, but I wouldn't bet on it.

Whatever you do, go NC she needs to know what's she'll be missing without you.

Best of Luck.

[itried]

I agree with neverme. I think that for her the spark is gone. However, it does come and go as the relationship progresses in time. This is usually what happens when a relationship goes long term (the spark fades).

But, when she says this:

"I do want you in my life i guess I'm just confused about what way ur in my life"

It can only mean one thing. She wants you in her life for the time being while she searches for someone that can give her that spark again. Once this is accomplished you can then say goodbye. She only says this because she's afraid of being alone. Think about it, there's really only one way for you to really fit in isn't there?

The best advice I can give is to walk away and let her sort her head out. Don't sit and wait on a person who would put you through this. It's a terrible feeling, I know, but in the end you'll feel much better about yourself if you don't fall for this trick.

[liz28]

It's not hard to understand what she's telling you but I think your having a hard time accepting it because of your feelings towards her. Well don't let that interfer with your common sense.

This girl doesn't want anything serious with you at this moment. I don't know if it's because of a new guy, life, or she don't how to tell you the truth etc because that line is similar to the "it's not you speech", so move on and don't get caught up in her confusion. Let her stay confuse and sort out her confusion. If you try and stick around your only be hurting yourself.

[Aliena]

liz28 is right,maybe she does not want to have a serious relationship right now.maybe you need to reassure her.ask her if she wants you to be her life partner.try to be more romantic,understanding and more caring.try to be different from her friends.trying to be more attractive and make her want need you then she will realize that she truly loves you.I think she's reacting this way because she's not sure if she loves you or not.try to have some romantic talks and spend some time together,smiling,cracking some jokes and make her happy and enjoy life.try to make her more closer to you.

But if she seems that she's not interested in you,you better ignore her.don't give her the opportunity to think that you are after her and you would do anything she say.don't make her think that you depend on her otherwise she'll take advantage of you.

Always move ahead in life!
Take care

[talaniman]

When a partner is unsure of where things are going after a year, it means your just a friend she cares about and its time to decide if you can JUST be friends or not.

Back off and see how you feel about that friendship thing, and forget anything more. If you can't handle just friends, best to leave her alone.

I hope you have a life without her, as that's what your going to need.

[heartbroke]

She sounds confused. She's hit a fork in the road and doesn't know what she wants from you. She got scared that it went from messing around to being serious. She's unsure of it and that shows doubt. If she isn't talking to you about it, more than likely its not good. I would prepare for the worse. It'll start with "i need time". From then on just be prepared.