[caught151]

Hi my 1st time on this and I need to know what do with my situation??

Hello I am 23 and my girlfriend is 28 we have been seeing each other for 1 year.. Everything in the beginning was fine but then I started to have doubts if she was being fateful... I confronted her and she denied it so I believed her and left it alone... One day I was looking through her phone at some pics and seen one of him and her she again denied it.

Make a long story short she is on vacation and asked me to check the mail for her. She received a letter from the guy in question and I opened it.. I know I shouldn't haved but my gut told me to. Anyway it was from him and I found out everything thing.. she went on a trip with him and had some intimate kisses if that was only what is was.

Now this is where I need help... Do I tell her I opened the letter and confront her about it...


Any advise would be greatly appreciated...

[grindin]

Just leave her. Don't tell her anything. Don't see her, speak to her, or think about her. She doesn't care about you. You are better than that.

[angerod]

First, Sorry you're going through this. If you had doubts in the first place why didn't you just break it off. I know you've been together for a year, but think of the happiness you could have and not the worrying of your girl cheating on you. Deal with this from your head and not your heart.

[neverme]

Well you have two options:

a) tell her and confront her


Or


b) walk away and say nothing.

It's up to you. I'd have to confront it myself. But one way or another you got to get out man, it's over and she's a b*#ch!

[heartbroke]

Trust is very important in a relationship, if you don't trust someone then you shouldn't be with them in the first place. If you were suspicious and nothing was going on, you would be labeled as possessive. I would confront her about it and then it would be up to you if you wanted to stay with her, personally I wouldn't if they weren't loyal.

[UnluckyDucky]

I believe that it is important in every relationship where certain boundaries should be set. Either partner should be allowed to pass such boundaries (nobody likes a control freak), but with the knowledge that if they do there will be consequences for their actions.

I respect myself too much to play games like this and let someone walk all over me so this would be a complete dealbreaker for me. I would walk away from this relationship and not look back.

Now since you're the one who will ultimately have to live with this situation, you have to ask yourself if you're willing to tolerate this behavior or not. If you're willing to overlook this behavior and confront her and try to see if this can be worked out, by all means. If you want to walk completely away from the situation that is your choice as well.

My advice is to cut your losses and get out of there - but the final decision is yours to make.

[itried]

Here's what I would do:

When she gets back from vacation (maybe with the guy?) I would hand her all of her mail (except for the letter). Then I would wait for a bit as she got settled in. After she's nice and situated, I'd casually hand her the ripped envelope with the letter in it. I'd say: "Oh yeah, I forgot to give you this as well", or something along those lines, as casually as possible and then I'd walk away, never speak to her again and forget about her.

In a situation like this you have to keep your respect and pride intact because you've already lost so much of it while she has been cheating. I know it's going to be really hard, but you have to decide if you actually want to stay with a person who has these tendencies. The way I see it is that it's been over for her for a long while. All she is probably doing is trying to devise a scheme where she can leave you, be with the other guy and all the while make it seem like she never was cheating on you with him so that her new relationship isn't tainted. What the hell man! She already went on a trip with this guy while she was with you! If that's not a sign of her intentions then I don't know what is. For your sake, just end it with her on YOUR terms and find someone who wants to be with you.

[friend4u178]

If you confront her and she has a good excuse you still wouldn't be able to trust her afterwards.

Tell her you found it and your breaking up with her because she betrayed your trust.

[talaniman]

I'm big on disappearing from people lives and let them wonder.

[neverme]

Yeah we know Tal! LOL

[friend4u178]

LOL... Let them wonder while you wander :)

[Romefalls19]

I'm completely with Tal on this, while she is on the vacation. Use this time wisely, and by wisely I mean, change your number, get your sh*t from her house and never talk to the broad again.

[kctiger]

Blow the letter up (go to Kinkos), frame it, and hang it so she can see it when she walks into her front door...

Do this, of course, after you have erased yourself from her life...

[Romefalls19]

Kc, perfect plan!