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sarahsquestions · Feb 17, 2009, 11:44 AM

Hi

Ive been going out with my boyfriend for nearly 6 years. I know that he loves me and I love him, we're planning to buy a house and get married but our sex life is awful. He has a really low sex drive or at least he says he has. I do not have that trouble.

Everything in that department will be excellent for a couple of months and then will totally disappear for six months. I have spoken to him about this over and over again and he always says he will try harder but then he doesn't.

I know he's physically attracted to me because of the "on" times so what's the problem? Should his libido be so uneven? He's only 25.

He is absolutely perfect in every other way and the idea of losing him is totally horrific so I don't want to push him away. He loves me and spoils me and makes me feel like a princess. This is the only issue we have.

I'm so confused.

Can his libido really be so low normally? Or is it me? Or is it just us? I need help or advice or something because I'm at breaking point and I don't know what to do.

adam_89 · Feb 17, 2009, 11:55 AM

Don't give up on him. Try talking to him about it. Maybe he just has too much stress going on or something similar. Then again, sex is an excellent stress reliever for most people. I would say some guys might have a low libido, but isn't very common.

smoothy · Feb 17, 2009, 12:14 PM

Make sure he see's his physician to make sure he has no medical problems... and what medications is he on, if any?

sarahsquestions · Feb 17, 2009, 12:26 PM

Originally Posted by smoothy

Make sure he see's his physician to make sure he has no medical problems....and what medications is he on, if any?

He isn't on any medication, and he is in good health, and his work isn't stressful. There doesn't seem to be any reason for this I can think of.

smoothy · Feb 17, 2009, 02:01 PM

Originally Posted by sarahsquestions

He isnt on any medication, and he is in good health, and his work isn't stressful. There doesnt seem to be any reason for this I can think of.

Make sure he see's his physician with the Dr knowing of this problem. It might be a result of things the Dr. would not routinely screen for at his age. But can be determined if he knows what he's looking for.

Hormone levels are just one thing... and if he doesn't have full bloodwork done as well annually to check for things like high or low blood sugar etc, it might be undiagnosed. Not everyone gets these done annually but should in conjunction with their annual physical.

Choux · Feb 17, 2009, 03:37 PM

This relationship is not going anywhere. Six years with what began as a teen age relationship, girl, time to move on.

What you *dream of* is holding you back from accepting the realities of life. You're never going to have a man who can *meet your needs* while you are with this guy.

Time is passing rapidly. Have courage. :) Go to a professional to help you sort out your issues. :)

Best wishes,