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N0help4u · Jul 14, 2008, 07:59 AM

[QUOTE=talaniman]https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/search...archid=2973708

Can you spell/smell gold digger?

talaniman · Jul 14, 2008, 08:00 AM

This is what I wrote 10 days ago! What has changed??

Jul 4, 2008, 11:05 AM.

You may as well enjoy it, because from your previous posts it will never last. You both may think this is love, but I really don't. Sorry, but I have read your whole story, and don't see that everlasting love as you do, and I only think she is in it as a convenient, fun thing to do, and can use sex to keep you guessing, but doing nothing except what she wants. Sorry guy, I think your gut is telling you something you need to hear.
__________________

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N0help4u · Jul 14, 2008, 08:03 AM

For a wedding present she might as well invest in a 14k gold collar and leash for you!

vickieodongoz · Aug 2, 2008, 11:09 PM

Hi all I have a girl who move in with me awhile ago she always never want to go out with me if I bring the topic if she lend me money she expect me to pay her back yet me I do lots of things for her without any expection back she say she loves me almost ten times in one day is it love what do you guyz think.she is always indoor and she she move in with me I have stop being withfriends my work is getting slow since I want to stick with her in the house pliz help what can I do

ISneezeFunny · Aug 3, 2008, 12:08 AM

Got to address this one by one.

1. she never wants to go out. Any reason? Perhaps she doesn't like your friends... doesn't like going where you go? Do you try to make plans to do some things that she likes? Perhaps with her friends?

2. if she lends you money, you have to pay her back. There's really no room for argument there. If you lend her money, and you don't ask for it back, that's on you... but whenever anyone lends money, it's expected to be paid back.

So she's a homebody, and you're not. Moving in together is a big move... and some things change. You may have to tone down the going out thing by a little, so you spend more time with her, but also leave room to go out with your buddies once or twice a week. Perhaps you can plan something that she likes to do... if not, grab a movie, and stay in once in a while.

I can't tell you if it's love or not... no one can. No one really knows the two of you, nor the kind of relationship that you two have, so that's a tough thing to do. Regardless, you two need to sit down, talk about this (the going out part... spending time together AND spending time on your own... everyone needs space every now and then).

vickieodongoz · Nov 9, 2008, 03:56 AM

Hi I love my girlfriend so so muh. Her birthday is so soon like in two weeks time.and I will be traveling with her to celebrate her birth day with her family.whih gift can I give her that she will love and remember forever.bear in mind that her ffamily will be there
I love her so much

kctiger · Nov 9, 2008, 06:34 AM

The best gift you can give is something that comes from the heart, something that took time and creativity to make. Material things really aren't the best things to give... It is hard to say because I have no idea how long you have been together and how serious you guys are.

Chey1221 · Nov 9, 2008, 06:55 AM

All right well my name is Chey and I'm going to do my best to help you out on this one... Well if I were your girlfriend... Im not one to ask for anything. For my birthday my boyfriend knew just enough about me to make it a day of me.. He started by cooking me breakfast and then serving me in bed... which I found really cute... Then he even picked out what he wanted me to wear and had me put it on. Then we went to see a movie he took me out to lunch a Ruby tuesdays. Then we hit the mall where, when I was in the ladies room he ran over to this Jewlery store apparentally because when I came out that's where he was walking back from. I just kind of looked at him weird and he insisted he had to go home. So we got back to my house. And to my surprise no one was home... Something I should have guessed... That's when I knew this was all a plan he had with my family. So we got in the house.. Good thing I brought me keys and there were streamers a cake and dinner set up for 2. There were candles everywhere which helped me relax. He took me to the table, we ate. Then he took me to the couch located in the living room... he sat me down put his on my knee. And spoke these words.
"I've never had to such a hard time shopping for someone. I guess its because i care so much about you that i just didnt want to screw things up."
At this point he picks up a remote and hits the play button and our song started to play... when the chorus came up he hugged me and whispered it into my ear. Then he pulled away and I smiled and he handed me this little box.
And told me to open it...
When I opened it and looked inside my heart stopped. A few years before this my grandfather died and he had the picture of me and my grandfather engraved on a necklace. And on the back it had the date he passed away and it said. " I know you'll never forget him... " and just as I was finished looking it over admirring its beauty. He was putting it on me... and handing me another one.. And it was the first pic me and him had ever taken together well as a couple. And on the back it had our anniversery and on the back it said " ... Just like ill never forget you. Happy birthday. " I just melted... it was the best thing In the WHOLE world... and it was really cute... there is no other day that could top that. Ever.

vickieodongoz · Feb 1, 2009, 01:37 PM

**Heavily edited**

Greetings. Its close to two years since my girl move in with me. I have been the one spending money, and paying for everything for her. Treating her well. I even paid for her flight to go visit her parents. We have plans for the future, but of late we have been having fights a lot especially about money issues since I have not been working for one month now, and if I spend any money on her or like for instance when I paid for our flights to go see my parents she complained a lot that am wasting money. I am a Christian, and devoted to my Christian walk, but she is always against us going to church together. She criticize my faith, I can't listen to gospel music the way I use to. If I ask to go out with her like for dinner, she insist we eat in the house, and she brings unnecessary fights.
Lastly she now wants us to have separate economy because she say I am not spending wise, yet am not earning money since am out of work. What should I do? Is our relationship falling? Please advice

talaniman · Feb 1, 2009, 01:58 PM

Ask Me Help Desk - Search Results.

Maybe some adjustments are needed. By you both!

Nestorian · Feb 1, 2009, 02:06 PM

Change maybe best, what kind is up to you.

Peace and kindness

UnluckyDucky · Feb 1, 2009, 09:38 PM

Part of dating and relationships is finding someone that has common interests, goals, and values as we do.

It looks like there are some issues with the some of the important key aspects such as Religion. Its important that you both be on the same page when it comes to these ideals because it can cause major problems down the road. (another one for example would be if you wanted kids but your partner didn't)

I highly suggest you reevalute your current situation and see if you're willing to live with her demands and views. At the end of the day you're ultimately the one who will be sleeping in that bed you made, not us.

Good luck

vickieodongoz · Mar 19, 2009, 01:34 PM

Hi everyone, I seriously need help.I love this girl.she tells me she loves me like 100 in a day.we have been together for one year now.the problem is.she never want to go out with me.but before I meet her she was a big fun of clubbing and going out.whenever I asked her we go out even if its for dinner she always say she want to eat at home. And if we go out in a restaurant she start dozing and sleeping immediately.when I ask to drive her home to sleep such that I go out alone she don't want and it result into fights.sometimes she shouts at me and abuse me then later she say she is so super sorry.what can I do?why is this happening?

Duncan k · Mar 19, 2009, 01:50 PM

If you really love her, sit down with her, tell her how you really feel, make her see things from your perspective and also let her know what's at stake. Then you can take things from there.

nikkiharms3 · Mar 19, 2009, 02:38 PM

Sometimes you need to have breaks, if your missing nights out then say to her... "look i dont mind staying in with you but there are going to be times that i want to go out and see friends aswell"

Being in eachothers pockets (especially when its doing something you don't want to do) can ruin the relationship, you will end up resenting her for holding you back

Xxx

Ren6 · Mar 19, 2009, 03:05 PM

What odd behavior! Is she drunk or high when you take her out? Or is she just trying to send you a passive aggressive message that she doesn't want to be out? Sit her down and let her know that it's necessary for your sanity that you get out of the house every now and then for dinner or clubbing. You should go out with friends if she doesn't want to accompany you. If she becomes hostile to you for going ahead and going out, then you've really got a problem. I'd end it if she a) still won't go out with you; or b) won't go out with you and won't let you go out with any of your friends, either. Good luck!

liz28 · Mar 19, 2009, 04:42 PM

Above everything else why do you stay with someone that is abusing you? Abuse is never an answer and it's uncalled for.

Why do you stay with girl because in no shape or form is this love and if this is love I wouldn't want no part of it.

I think you can do better without her. She sounds like a miserable person that don't like to do anything but knows how to be abusive, leave. What is there to talk about?

talaniman · Mar 21, 2009, 11:03 AM

Have you sat her down, and worked together to define the boundaries of this relationship?

I wish · Mar 21, 2009, 03:48 PM

Originally Posted by talaniman

Have you sat her down, and worked together to define the boundaries of this relationship?

Have to share reputation.

Yeah, you really have to start opening up a communication line. Successful relationships require a strong communication base. Just confront her about it.

A mouse · Mar 24, 2009, 02:55 PM

If you think that a lady is going to be a clubber her entire life, you've got a lot to learn. But if she becomes just completely boring you need to talk with her about it when she's in a good mood. Tell her how you miss the fun her and can't keep with somebody who doesn't want to do anything. Actually you might also want to ask if she's doing any drugs to make her act that way.
If after a couple weeks there's no change in her activity, you should probably break it off. While it may hurt both of you now, she's not going to change and it'll hurt a lot more to stay with her for several more years and then break up.

-Mouse