[hedgepig]

Ok...

I've been thinking for some time that I need to see someone, but then I don't really know what's up, I don't know if I'm "putting it on" or "attention seeking" or maybe there's something wrong with me.

My symptoms?
I can feel utterly dejected and lonely, sometimes for no apparent reason, sometimes because someone has said or done something - really small and stupidly insignificant. So much so that when "my head's right again" I really regret and hate what I felt. And I cry (a lot, random intervals) but I don't feel any better - worse in fact.
I try to distance myself from people so I don't get hurt first, I make some really good friends, yet hold them at a distance. I hate that, I wish I didn't do it.
I really can't deal with change, mostly in people.
I do fun things all the time, I can have such a good time and I'll be on a massive high for a while, especially after something active, couple of days even! But it doesn't last, I don't know what I can do.
Sometimes the world would definitely be so much better off without me - I'm not suicidal I would never kill myself. No, in my head I would Much rather be in an accident that causes me to (not exist) or to be drastically ill in hospital.
I have lost appetite almost totally - I love cooking (and eating) more than anything and I'll cook really nice, super tasty stuff but can't eat it, I've lost a lot of weight, gone down 2 dress sizes since start of dec. (I can't lose much more).

Me?
I'm a healthy, quite active fresher at uni, eat me veg, do me exercise. Living in halls so I'm constantly surrounded by fabulous people. Have a boyfriend but I think that I'm pushing him away too, even though I love him more than anything. Have no money (but that's nothing new - student!? ) though not eating is helping with the money side of things. Lol. I sing with a gospel choir cos it makes me happy, though I'm not religious.

Am I normal?

[Choux]

Sounds like you are having some problems while you are transitioning from high school to college-adulthood. I think many girls have that problem because this is a time going forward of making decisions that effect the rest of your life.

It is important to know that education is your main goal, focus on that. The financial stability you will have in the rest of your life depend on what you do now... how educated you are in a field that pays well.

I think you would benefit from having a framework in which to live your life... good ethics and morality, altruistic goals... to keep a part of your focus on others people and their welfare, not on yourself. Works wonders. :)

[Maggie 3]

What I see here is an eating problem.If you do not eat right
You can get into trouble. Your emotions will be upset and make you feel odd or bad.
Get a good healthy, nourishing diet and stay on it. Try it, it could be your whole
Problem. Eating and keeping your health up shoud be #1 in your life. You can not
Take care of other things in your life if you are unhealthy.

Maggy 3

[Jake2008]

Feeling dejected, lonely, crying for no reason, change in eating habits, brief periods of happiness followed by depression, distancing yourself from the world, becoming reclusive, and keeping people at arms length in anticipation of being hurt, is not normal behaviour.

Wishing to be gone whether suicide or not is another indicator there is much more going on here that needs to be addressed.

I don't know how long these symptoms have gone on, but I suspect several months.

Everybody has experienced one or more of the things you've described, that is only human behaviour. But, to realize that your life is becoming one you do not wish to live in, is a red flag.

Please seek counselling. If your school has a referral service, use it. There could be more in addition to what you've said, such as a thyroid condition, or imbalance of some kind which is contributing to this. Get a thourough checkup, and be honest with who you see. Write a list, or copy this post you've written, and bring it with you.

Any counsellor or doctor worth their salt, will take time to assess and offer help.

[idntknwwhttodo]

All right, I'm no expert, but you sound a lot lke me, I just finished my first semester of college, and in October, I dropped about 3 dress sizes because I simply couldn't eat without getting sick, I was upset all the time and stressed out.

Go to the doctor or a counselor, I went through this a few winters in a row and was diagnosed with seasonal depression, and this year, with adjusting to the new living situation, I started having anxiety attacks a few times a week, and since then the doctor put me on anxiety medication and its been helping with all my symptoms of both the depression and the anxiety

[hedgepig]

I went to see my doc who has referred me to a counselor and also put me on medication. Hopefully things will begin to look up once I've started. Thank you for your help