[dacana51]

I have a pretty good relationship w/ my boyfriend. We have a beautiful baby together and we have been together for a little over 2 years. Just one problem, I can't seem to stop thinking of my ex.

He and I broke up 3 1/2 years ago and I moved away. We carried on w/ a long distance (phone only) relationship on and off until I met my current boyfriend. It was a very destructive relationship... we fought constantly, bickered endlessly, but when things were good... THEY WERE GOOD.

I know we were awful together and we would still be awful together, but sometimes I catch myself wanting to call him and/ or email him.

I don't want to hurt my boyfriend, so I want to know if there's anything I can do to just shut that part of my history out and focus on my current relationship and make it work.

[Clough]

Hi, dacana51!

I still think of some of my ex's because there truly was love there on both parts, but for one reason or another, things just didn't work out. Some of those relationships happened over 25 years ago.

One suggestion that I have, would be that if you still have any items that had to do with your ex, is that you either get rid of them or put them away somewhere where they can't be seen. If having any items around is what might be part of your problem with concentrating on your present boyfriend, than doing those things might help.

I hope that it does!

Hopefully, others will also be along to address your question.

I wish for you only the best! Things like this can take a lot of time...

Thanks!

[411Help]

Stop contacting your ex.

This will only resurface the old emotions all over again.

Look past your history, work on the present, and strive for a better future.

[kctiger]

Maybe you aren't ready to be in a relationship yet, if you are still so focused on your ex. That is a LONG time ago to be dwelling on, but, like clough said, sometimes we have thoughts back to things like these. Pay attention to your own grass right now... I would think, if it is green enough, you wouldn't worry about another lawn. (Did you pick up on that analogy).

[dacana51]

Thank you so much everyone. Your answers have helped me to gain a new perspective of my dilema. Take care.