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    kidshelpphone's Avatar
    kidshelpphone Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jan 1, 2009, 01:07 AM
    Why is she putting me down
    OK so I dated this one girl and we had sexs then she told me she was pregnant then she got a abortion and now were broken up and we don't talk much but when we do we start fighting and she calls me ugly and lots of people say I'm hot and cute but she say there just being nice and she says she was going to throw up when she was yanging with me and that I was small and hey I'm 7 inches I like my size and a bunch of other why is she doing this?:confused:
    clhend's Avatar
    clhend Posts: 44, Reputation: 9
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    Jan 1, 2009, 07:14 AM

    She's hurting and being young the only way she knows to deal with the pain is to lash out at you as the source of her pain. Forgive her. Then get on with your life... however you might want to reconsider having sex so soon in a relationship.

    Try waiting and building a solid relationship. Get a hobby. Get a life! Sex is NOT a new toy to be played with until you wear it out. There are responsibilities to sex that most people don't want to think about... oh well, get pregnant have an abortion, no big deal! Well, as you can see your ex is having some real issues as a result of some decisions that two of you made.

    Get on with your life and just realize that the mean things she's saying are her immature way of dealing with the emotional pain.
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #3

    Jan 1, 2009, 08:35 AM

    The two of you aren't together so you don't have to talk to her. She's trying to kill your spirit so whey even talk to someone like this?

    Stop talking and you already knows what she's saying doesn't apply so let it fly and stop communicating with her because I wouldn't talk to someone who only goal is to try to make me feel bad.

    Also, she might still be hurting from the abortion she had and is trying hurt you to throw some of her hurt on you. That could be part of it but they have counselors out there that can help her deal with what was done if she wants the help.
    SukhBamrah's Avatar
    SukhBamrah Posts: 42, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Jan 1, 2009, 09:10 AM

    One thing, which I have made out is that you might not be considerate as in such a relationship which ends up in 'abortion' stage, shows that you both did not take precautions, for which she only suffered as it happens in all such cases, and man justs thinks off at the most and once and just once, place yourself at her place and you will comprehend the fact, she is young and had got one abortion and 'beauty' or 'handsomeness' are relative terms and there is nothing like beauty, it lies as they say in BEHOLDERS EYES and if you are in her good books you are good-looking for her and otherwise VICE VERSA...

    PS- Kindly react.. (u and others)
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #5

    Jan 1, 2009, 10:27 PM

    Don't be dense fellow, she is angry with you, and letting you know she didn't like the way things went. She was hurt badly, so leave her alone to heal, and you get a life, and get protection for those 7 inches your so proud of.
    SukhBamrah's Avatar
    SukhBamrah Posts: 42, Reputation: 1
    Junior Member
     
    #6

    Jan 4, 2009, 07:19 AM

    Those 7 inches you are so proud of!! LOLZ!!

    Exactly, talaniman has hit the nail on the head, and you need to comprehend her situation by imagining yourself to be in the same hot or cold seat, where she is!!

    Any reaction from thread starter,,
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
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    #7

    Jan 4, 2009, 09:51 AM

    She sounds like a nut job. She's in emotional pain and she's lashing out trying to create a distance between what she perceives is the cause and protect herself.

    Also, in the future whether it be her or another ex or current girl, or guy for that matter what other people say about is a reflection on them. You can't let other people's insecurities become your own. I'd be the first to admit that I've dealt with this myself over the years but when I look back at situations like this one, many time I accepted other's put downs as fact, when in reality they the ones with the problem and not me.

    We've all seen the person completely lose control of themselves in public place and we never say, "well their right because their yelling and calling people names" instead we kind of laugh at them and say "what's wrong with this person?" Yet when we have someone close to us put us down, we do the exact opposite and believe what they say, somehow thinking their problems are a reflection of our own.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
    Uber Member
     
    #8

    Jan 4, 2009, 10:35 AM

    I agree with the others the only way to avoid her emotional verbal abuse is to not communicate with her and when you do you need to --be understanding and sympathetic not taking her lashing out personally.
    If you ever notice when somebody gets in a heated argument the first thing they start doing is saying things like you are fat and ugly like they won the argument by personally attacking you whether it is true or not.
    SukhBamrah's Avatar
    SukhBamrah Posts: 42, Reputation: 1
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    #9

    Jan 6, 2009, 09:28 AM

    Sane and Sound advice from both these guys
    asking's Avatar
    asking Posts: 2,673, Reputation: 660
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    #10

    Jan 6, 2009, 09:38 AM

    She is angry about something that happened between the two of you. What did you do when you found out she was pregnant? Did you offer to marry her? Did you help her decide what to do? Did you stay with her and hold her hand when she went for the abortion? If not, I'm guessing that she is justifiably angry that you left her in the lurch and didn't "man up," since her pregnancy was the result of something you pushed for.
    Romefalls19's Avatar
    Romefalls19 Posts: 4,739, Reputation: 1130
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    #11

    Jan 6, 2009, 11:18 AM

    asking, I agree with your response all the way up until you stated it was something he pushed for. We don't know what the actions were to lead up to this so to think he pushed for sex is inconsiderate. It could have been mutual, but either way, the type of behavior both of these people are showing proves that neither are ready for a child, let alone sex. I wish these younger kids would stop and think about things. I wonder which head they really do think with.

    Don't be silly, cover your willy
    SukhBamrah's Avatar
    SukhBamrah Posts: 42, Reputation: 1
    Junior Member
     
    #12

    Jan 7, 2009, 09:16 AM

    asking, what is the meaning of 'manning up'?

    And, it is fact that u must be (to thread starter), pushing up her for all the hell and when she fell pregnant, u must have left her in the lurch and it is common problem and rather than ditching her to cry alone, u must have thought of some solution...

    Clarify this point!
    kidshelpphone's Avatar
    kidshelpphone Posts: 13, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #13

    Jan 24, 2009, 12:18 AM

    One of my exs told me that she lied about being pregnant I want to know why and she's now engaged! What the hell!

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