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    Prestondvt's Avatar
    Prestondvt Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #1

    Dec 23, 2008, 09:42 PM
    Getting hard.
    Why can't I get hard while having sex with someone new? Every time I try to have sex with someone I can't get it up. What can I do to fix it?
    starfirefly's Avatar
    starfirefly Posts: 397, Reputation: 33
    Full Member
    		  
    #2

    Dec 23, 2008, 09:46 PM

    Did you try foreplay?
    roxypox's Avatar
    roxypox Posts: 1,028, Reputation: 328
    Ultra Member
    		  
    #3

    Dec 23, 2008, 10:19 PM

    Its prob just angst issues... or that you put too much pressure on the whole performing thing... but foreplay might fix it, as suggested above
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,490, Reputation: 2853
    Uber Member
    		  
    #4

    Dec 24, 2008, 06:14 AM
    Well you can stop having one night stands for starters...

    It isn't supposed to be about self gratification.
    Choux's Avatar
    Choux Posts: 3,047, Reputation: 376
    Ultra Member
    		  
    #5

    Dec 26, 2008, 11:14 AM

    Sounds like performance anxiety.

    Instead of having sex with relative strangers just because it is the thing to do in your social circle, stop doing that and get to know a girl for a while to see if she really turns you on at some level and see if she really finds you an attractive personality to ____.

    Good Luck!
    cyn1244's Avatar
    cyn1244 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #6

    Dec 26, 2008, 02:22 PM
    Every time?? Maybe try getting to know them on an intellectual level and maybe you'll them find someone that turns you on in every way possible
    Starbucks21's Avatar
    Starbucks21 Posts: 282, Reputation: 23
    Full Member
    		  
    #7

    Dec 27, 2008, 12:54 PM

    Well you could be stressed out...

    There are a lot of risk in the back of your head (stds... unplanned pregnancy... I'm sure people can name many more)

    I suggest either settling down with a committed partner (insert sexual preference here) and have a loving relationship

    Some guys aren't programed for bar sex

    Settling down has benefits that are more than you can imagine if you love the person
    Nellie_x's Avatar
    Nellie_x Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #8

    Dec 29, 2008, 12:48 PM

    Maybe you just don't feel any sexal attraction towards them,

    Unlucky
    cowboy107's Avatar
    cowboy107 Posts: 28, Reputation: 3
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    #9

    Dec 29, 2008, 10:37 PM

    This happened to me a couple times. For me I was just trying so hard to get up and going at her for the whole night, and my buddy wasn't feeling it I guess haha.
    Don't know man. It's prob just a psycological thing. Too worried about puttin it to her then actually getting aroused and enjoying it I guess.
    Just relax bro, that's all I did and I was good to go
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