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    love092489's Avatar
    love092489 Posts: 32, Reputation: 2
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    #1

    Dec 20, 2008, 03:52 PM
    Victim of One-Sided Love
    Hello all,
    My name is Trista and I am a victim of one-sided love and I wanted to know if anyone could help me! There is this a guy I met my junior year in high school. During that year we were just friends and we never pursued each other or anything. Over the summer before our senior year we saw each other at this summer event and after that we started to like each other. All throughout senior year we hung out a lot, but we never made anything official and we were messing around. But he hurt me multiple times and the last time he hurt me was when I was in English and I got a text from my best friend and she said, "I think that you should know that John has a girlfriend and he doesnt know how to tell you." From that point on I was really hurt. We all went on to graduate and I didn't speak to him the whole entire summer and now we go to the same college and we seem to have mutual friends that we are around and a few weeks ago he said that he wanted to hang out and we did and I had an amazing time and we hung out about two or three times that week and now I haven't heard from him but I think that he is back with his ex. He told me that he doesn't like to hurt me and that's why he doesn't call or come by because he figures if he doesn't see me he can't hurt me. Do you think that a load of crap? What should I do? He doesn't know that I'm in love with him he just knows that I like him. I feel like since he loves her, and it will never be all about me I should just give it up! But I don't know how! What to do Help please.
    Scleros's Avatar
    Scleros Posts: 2,165, Reputation: 262
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    #2

    Dec 20, 2008, 04:52 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by love092489 View Post
    What should I do? He doesnt know that I'm in love with him he just knows that I like him.
    As someone who has survived a similar experience and wasted two decades of my life expending energy on a unrequited relationship, my suggestion for you is to tell him how you feel and then leave him alone. If he wants you, he'll come around, although it may take years. If not, you've saved yourself potentially years of misery and can focus on finding someone who wants you as much as you want them. Don't allow him to torment you by making you his yo-yo he can come to when he doesn't have any better options. Any heartache, anguish, or depression you're feeling now can get much, much worse. Also, ask yourself honestly if what you believe you feel for him is truly love or merely obsession.

    Quote Originally Posted by love092489 View Post
    I am a victim of one-sided love...
    Choose not to be through your actions.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Dec 20, 2008, 06:16 PM

    Be glad you know everything now, and accept his feeling were not as strong as yours, and the coward didn't even have the guts to be honest with you.

    Leave him alone, and let time heal you, as you regroup, and love yourself, and do good things for yourself.

    Its not your fault you cared for a dishonest cheater, but it is your fault, if you let him tear yourself apart over him.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #4

    Dec 20, 2008, 09:39 PM

    Yeah it sounds like all he ever wanted was friends with benefits.
    Forget him and move on.

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