[chattede]

Hello Friends,

I really need your guidance. My baby 3 weeks old and I am facing difficulty in let her sleep on Bed. As soon as I feed (breast feed) and do burping and try to transfer her on bed she just woke up and always wants to sleep on my lap... she has become real fussy about it... This is really problem at night. She just cry whole day... also doctor told me she might be having colic... so even evening we have to handle her a lot .

I am getting hardly sleep of about 3 hrs... and baby sleeps for max 10-12 hrs... I am really scared about baby's health.

Please help me , how can I handle the situation and make her habit to sleep on bed. How can I handle colic also.

Looking for your experience / guidance.
Thanks

[xoxaprilwine]

My daughter was similar but didn't have the laying down issues. For colic babies it is a phase and the baby will grow out of it for the most part. You can help baby by watching what you eat (since your breast feeding) keep note of it and maybe your eating something that is upsetting the baby's stomach. Avoid spicy foods and keep an eye on colic times... in most cases it is on target for time. We also had to walk around with baby during colic times and stayed home for that duration of time. Holding baby all the time is also not recommended because they will build an attachement for you and warmth all the time... we laid down the baby and always put her in her own bed... she still does not sleep between us at 2. I found for my daughter that, that was the one of the issues... I administered Gripe Water and Oval... but only recommended doses and I ensured that I wasn't giving it too frequently... follow the guidelines and talk to your doctor about that. For colic, unfortunately, you will have to continue doing what your doing... I found baby massage helped too, just soothing baby and being the great mom you are.

You need your sleep, do you have someone to watch the baby while you take a nap? Since you are suppose to nap when baby is napping this is a problem for you. Baby won't sleep in the crib... I strongly suggest that you do not have the baby sleeping with you (since you can suffocate, or blankets can suffocate, or you might unintentionally move in your sleep). My daughter didn't sleep in the crib until she was 5 1/2 to 6 months old, I had a bassinet and had baby with me 24/7 so I can keep an eye on her and take the necessary naps. I also recommend getting a bassinet that vibrates... vibration is soothing to baby's (or to mine at least), also play some baby motzart music.

I would make the connection between colic and the bed... if you become upset this is normal... put the baby down and take a break... don't try to help the baby if you can't help yourself... you need to make sure that you can handle it... this is why some people shake the baby (can cause brain damage) so walk away for a minute to gather yourself and go back. Remember not to leave baby crying for more then 2-5 minutes because this is not healthy for the baby. Crying is normal, baby is working their vocal cords and sometimes cry for no reason at all.

Your baby is healthy, eating, gaining weight and growing according to normal standards. You are doing great mom. Take care and best of luck.

[chattede]

For Colic baby, as you pointed out that we need to keep baby comfortable... but for making her comfortable is nothing but keep her always with me which again increase the problem of behavior - need Mom always... I am working and obviously this will not help me... I am really confused how to comfort her as well as how to teach her good behaviour..

[xoxaprilwine]

How old is baby?

[chattede]

How old is baby?

She is 4 week old

[Wondergirl]

My colicky baby is 38 years old now, so you see we lived through it.

Yes, I was tired--exhausted, in fact. The father helped by staying up on weekends, but not during the week since he had to go to work. I catalog books at a library and know there are many that give good advice on breastfeeding and on colic. Please go to your library and look for some of these.

The colic has nothing to do with your baby sleeping in your bed. Colic just is. (My second son didn't have it.) The more relaxed and easy you can be, the better for the baby. Babies sense upset and nervousness.

This is from a Google search --

Treatment of Colic
Nothing wears away at a parent's nerves like a baby's crying spells. Other harsh noises are merely annoying, but a baby's wailing is downright distressing, because it makes you feel so helpless, so frustrated, and so inadequate as a parent.

That feeling is universal. All babies cry; it is natural, normal, and even healthy – at least for the baby. The toll it takes on your mental health is another matter. The guide that follows will help you understand why your baby cries, what you may be able to do about it, and how to hold on to what remains of your sanity when it seems as if the shrieking will never stop.

Calming tactics that sometimes quiet colicky babies include:

* rhythmic motion. Rock your child in a cradle or in your lap in a rocking chair; put them into a soft baby carrier that holds them close to your chest and "wear" them around the house; take them for a ride in an elevator or in an auto (in their car seat).

* swaddling. Wrap your baby snugly in a lightweight blanket. This will not only make them feel secure but will also inhibit the Moro reflex, their habit of flinging their arms out and bringing them back when they are startled. This involuntary movement can itself upset a colicky baby and make them cry.

* baby massage. In this traditional Indian practice, the baby is stroked in a continuous, flowing movement from head to foot, using light stroking and deeper massage.

* lambskin. A cuddly cushion of wool can make a crib, car seat, or stroller cozier and help your baby fall asleep more easily.

* mirrors. Unbreakable reflective surfaces such as those that appear on many baby toys can often capture and hold a fussy infant's attention.

* a baby carrier. This bears another mention, because it seems to succeed for two reasons. Even if the proximity to your body fails to quiet baby, the carrier frees your arms and lets you go anywhere without feeling that you're neglecting your fussy child.

* the Sleep Tight. The Sleep Tight Infant Soother consists of a vibration unit that mounts under the crib and a sound unit that attaches to the crib rail. Your pediatrician can tell you whether the Sleep Tight would be appropriate and useful in your baby's case. (This device is not promoted directly to consumers).

* singing and/or dancing. A musical interlude can work wonders. Partner your baby by holding them up close or propped on your arm. Look into their eyes as you glide around the floor to the sound of your own vocal accompaniment or to recorded music.

* comfort sucking. Babies have strong sucking needs unrelated to their need for food; they simply find it comforting to hold something in their mouth. Offer the breast, a finger, or a pacifier.

Colic will be gone by the time the baby is 2 or 3 months old.

[chattede]

My colicky baby is 38 years old now, so you see we lived through it.

Yes, I was tired--exhausted, in fact. The father helped by staying up on weekends, but not during the week since he had to go to work. I catalog books at a library and know there are many that give good advice on breastfeeding and on colic. Please go to your library and look for some of these.

The colic has nothing to do with your baby sleeping in your bed. Colic just is. (My second son didn't have it.) The more relaxed and easy you can be, the better for the baby. Babies sense upset and nervousness.

This is from a Google search --

Treatment of Colic
Nothing wears away at a parent's nerves like a baby's crying spells. Other harsh noises are merely annoying, but a baby's wailing is downright distressing, because it makes you feel so helpless, so frustrated, and so inadequate as a parent.

That feeling is universal. All babies cry; it is natural, normal, and even healthy – at least for the baby. The toll it takes on your mental health is another matter. The guide that follows will help you understand why your baby cries, what you may be able to do about it, and how to hold on to what remains of your sanity when it seems as if the shrieking will never stop.

Calming tactics that sometimes quiet colicky babies include:

* rhythmic motion. Rock your child in a cradle or in your lap in a rocking chair; put them into a soft baby carrier that holds them close to your chest and "wear" them around the house; take them for a ride in an elevator or in an auto (in their car seat).

* swaddling. Wrap your baby snugly in a lightweight blanket. This will not only make them feel secure but will also inhibit the Moro reflex, their habit of flinging their arms out and bringing them back when they are startled. This involuntary movement can itself upset a colicky baby and make them cry.

* baby massage. In this traditional Indian practice, the baby is stroked in a continuous, flowing movement from head to foot, using light stroking and deeper massage.

* lambskin. A cuddly cushion of wool can make a crib, car seat, or stroller cozier and help your baby fall asleep more easily.

* mirrors. Unbreakable reflective surfaces such as those that appear on many baby toys can often capture and hold a fussy infant's attention.

* a baby carrier. This bears another mention, because it seems to succeed for two reasons. Even if the proximity to your body fails to quiet baby, the carrier frees your arms and lets you go anywhere without feeling that you're neglecting your fussy child.

* the Sleep Tight. The Sleep Tight Infant Soother consists of a vibration unit that mounts under the crib and a sound unit that attaches to the crib rail. Your pediatrician can tell you whether the Sleep Tight would be appropriate and useful in your baby's case. (This device is not promoted directly to consumers).

* singing and/or dancing. A musical interlude can work wonders. Partner your baby by holding them up close or propped on your arm. Look into their eyes as you glide around the floor to the sound of your own vocal accompaniment or to recorded music.

* comfort sucking. Babies have strong sucking needs unrelated to their need for food; they simply find it comforting to hold something in their mouth. Offer the breast, a finger, or a pacifier.

Colic will be gone by the time the baby is 2 or 3 months old.

Thanks for the suggestions... but I am really worried as she just cries a lot - screams... hold her breath... face become reddish /bluish... its really hard to console her... some time I feel like she will stop breathing... I am becoming very helpless... sometime I am confused whether its colic / or just her fussiness.. seems like she is really stubborn... please tell me what should I do... each day is like a "year" to me.. I don't know how to pass another 1-2 months...

[xoxaprilwine]

Thanks for the suggestions...but I am really worried as she just cries a lot - screams...hold her breath...face become reddish /bluish...its really hard to console her...some time i feel like she will stop breathing...I am becoming very helpless.....sometime I am confused whether its colic / or just her fussiness..seems like she is really stubborn...please tell me what should I do ...each day is like a "year" to me ..I don't know how to pass another 1-2 months....

Colic is not gone by the time the baby is 2 - 3 months old... colic can be at any stage up to a year... or from what I am told. Colic babies generally have a hard time sleeping in the crib and it isn't something that is hand in hand but also a contribution to the issue (sleep deprivation). The Google search was helpful and I did all of the above except the lamb fur and mirrors. For the OP unfortunately you will have to deal with this (as you know) and try to take the advice given to see if you get any results. Colic is in my experience a symptom of upset stomach (this is why I am saying if your breastfeeding to watch what you eat... eventually when or if you switch to formula you can have the same results (child could be lactose) and will have to switch a few times maybe even to a soy product but try the #1 recommended). Another thing is maybe baby isn't feeding enough or getting enough food (hungry) this does happen when breastfeeding... how long are you breastfeeding and does the baby fall off on their own? I breastfeed on average for an hour to hour and a half each feeding until my daughter fell off my breast (I knew she was full then). You can use Oval and Grip Water to help along with swaddling, rocking, humming and those sorts of things. Baby might want the soother too (sometimes that helps) and even though they say not to give the baby water I did (distilled water) even if it was a couple teaspoons a day. Try doing this stuff for a week and see if you have any results and let us know. The advice given was great... also there has to be an early start line you can call to talk to a registered nurse for help (has a nurse come to see you yet?) How are you dealing with postpartum?

For sleeping in the crib - again I used a vibrating bassinet, wrapped baby snug and played baby music (it helped). Baby will cry a lot... learning to use vocal cords and growing and it is normal. Now if she/he is crying so hard that they are losing their breath... this is when she/he needs you the most... get up walk around, rock and sing... show baby pictures on the wall or a mirror to look at themselves (I walked on average 2-3 hours a night). I know it is hard but do your best... the doctor says its normal then it just may be for your baby... try to console even if it feels effortless because the baby knows you love her... do you do skin to skin contact? I think I lived in a rob for 3 months for that reason. My girl is an Aquarius and she is one tough cookie at two... but it does go away and it does get easier (I promise)

Do you have help dear?

[chattede]

Colic is not gone by the time the baby is 2 - 3 months old...colic can be at any stage up to a year...or from what I am told. Colic babies generally have a hard time sleeping in the crib and it isn't something that is hand in hand but also a contribution to the issue (sleep deprivation). The Google search was helpful and I did all of the above except the lamb fur and mirrors. For the OP unfortunately you will have to deal with this (as you know) and try to take the advice given to see if you get any results. Colic is in my experience a symptom of upset stomach (this is why I am saying if your breastfeeding to watch what you eat...eventually when or if you switch to formula you can have the same results (child could be lactose) and will have to switch a few times maybe even to a soy product but try the #1 recommended). Another thing is maybe baby isn't feeding enough or getting enough food (hungry) this does happen when breastfeeding...how long are you breastfeeding and does the baby fall off on their own? I breastfeed on average for an hour to hour and a half each feeding until my daughter fell off my breast (I knew she was full then). You can use Oval and Grip Water to help along with swaddling, rocking, humming and those sorts of things. Baby might want the soother too (sometimes that helps) and even though they say not to give the baby water I did (distilled water) even if it was a couple teaspoons a day. Try doing this stuff for a week and see if you have any results and let us know. The advice given was great...also there has to be an early start line you can call to talk to a registered nurse for help (has a nurse come to see you yet?) How are you dealing with postpartum?

For sleeping in the crib - again I used a vibrating bassinet, wrapped baby snug and played baby music (it helped). Baby will cry a lot...learning to use vocal cords and growing and it is normal. Now if she/he is crying so hard that they are loosing their breath...this is when she/he needs you the most...get up walk around, rock and sing...show baby pictures on the wall or a mirror to look at themselves (I walked on average 2-3 hours a night). I know it is hard but do your best...the doctor says its normal then it just may be for your baby...try to console even if it feels effortless because the baby knows you love her...do you do skin to skin contact? I think I lived in a rob for 3 months for that reason. My girl is an Aquarius and she is one tough cookie at two...but it does go away and it does get easier (I promise)

Do you have help dear?

Hi ,
Thanks for the information... yes my Mom is here but my baby wants me when she sries... but some time I think its not colic.. she has become stubborn & fussy... I am feeling very helpless as it seems I am not able to understand her needs... do you know how can I change her behaviour ?(if she is not having colic ?)...

Thanks

[Wondergirl]

She's awfully small to be stubborn. I'd rummage around for a physical cause first.

What soothes her?

When is she happiest?

How much sleep does she get and when? (You said 10-12 hours?? ) I slept when Baby slept - about the only way in the beginning.

What does the baby do to show she wants you and not your mom? ("my Mom is here but my baby wants me when she sries") At that age, my babies were OK with anyone who wanted to hold them.

[babieface85]

Try a warm blanket in her crib. It helped my son some times. My son was a crier. He still does not really sleep through the night that well and he is one year old. (He always wakes for his pacifier at least once) I also kind of think some babies are just cuddly than others.

Also she is used to being all warm and cozy inside of you. Now being held any short of 24/7 is a major adjustment.

I know many siblings. One will sleep through the night from day one and the other will wake every 2 hours till age two. It is not your parenting. Don't let anyone tell you that.

One more thing four weeks is kind of early for a baby to be sleeping through the night. I would not suspect that your baby has problems with sleep until at least four months.

[xoxaprilwine]

Try a warm blanket in her crib. It helped my son some times. My son was a crier. He still does not really sleep through the night that well and he is one year old. (He always wakes for his pacifier at least once) I also kind of think some babies are just cuddly than others.

Also she is used to being all warm and cozy inside of you. Now being held any short of 24/7 is a major adjustment.

I know many siblings. One will sleep through the night from day one and the other will wake every 2 hours till age two. It is not your parenting. Don’t let anyone tell you that.

One more thing four weeks is kinda early for a baby to be sleeping through the night. I would not suspect that your baby has problems with sleep until at least four months.

That's true, I woke up every two hours for the first four months before I allowed her to sleep all night - make sure baby is maintaining heat independently prior to sleeping the entire night. To the OP again, the baby isn't stubborn... he/she is just a baby and that's how it is. Some babies are quiet and others are not... my daughter was also an active one and at two years old... not much has changed she knows what she wants and that's that but at that stage I can say no and begin introducing ground rules of yes and no. Baby is too small... just be patient and try all these ideas... they are great and if you get the results wonderful. If not, then keep trying mom... its OK you are doing everything you can even though I know it is hard. Please try it out for a week and let us know how it goes... I would really like to get an update.