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XxMissBxX · Dec 10, 2008, 12:14 AM

Why do all the time I feel that guys only want me for one thing and why am I too scared to say no why do I just give in and give it to them in order to make them happy and within fear that they will leave me if I say no. I am sick of having my heart broken I have tried to focus on myself and not let lads get in the way but its so hard

jess85w · Dec 10, 2008, 12:17 AM

You feel insecure about yourself which draws you into the situation of wanting to make someone else happy other than yourself. A man will respect you more if you do say no to him. If he leaves because you tell him no then you know that he's just another pig out there that's not willing to commit. When you find that one person that does not care that you say no for the first couple months he won't care because he likes YOU not the sex.

XxMissBxX · Dec 10, 2008, 12:21 AM

Originally Posted by jess85w

You feel insecure about yourself which draws you into the situation of wanting to make someone else happy other than yourself. A man will respect you more if you do say no to him. If he leaves because you tell him no then you know that hes just another pig out there thats not willing to commit. When you find that one person that does not care that you say no for the first couple months he wont care because he likes YOU not the sex.

Yeah it is really weird cause the last couple of guys I have been with only wanted sex but lately this guy says he likes me and says he wants to wait a couple off months for sex and get to know me as a person and that

jess85w · Dec 10, 2008, 12:27 AM

Take your time. Listen to your heart and don't rush things. It sounds like you have FINALLY found a decent person that's real and not out to make an of himself or you. Cuddling can make a person happy and feel cared about just as much as having sex. Don't be afraid to say no and don't be afraid to walk away when you need to. It makes you a stronger person when you set boundries for yourself.

kctiger · Dec 10, 2008, 06:51 AM

Seems to me like you are just hooking up with the wrong BOYS! I, for one, do not care to meet a woman and have sex with her right away. That puts a red flag in my book. I would prefer to get to know the person a bit before we jump into bed together, but perhaps that is because I have a bit higher regard for sex.

ZoeMarie · Dec 10, 2008, 06:57 AM

Originally Posted by XxMissBxX

yeah it is really weird cause the last couple of guys i have been with only wanted sex but lately this guy says he likes me and says he wants to wait a couple off months for sex and get to know me as a person and that

That's what my husband said to me when we first met. That's how I knew he was a keeper. :)

Fr_Chuck · Dec 10, 2008, 06:58 AM

If you can't say no and just give in, then you will attact and get a reputation for someone who is easy and so guys just wanting sex will be drawn to you.

So you need to learn to say no ( unless you really want to say yes)

redwee74 · Dec 10, 2008, 07:03 AM

This coming from a guys view, I agree with kctiger, if a girl sleeps with me real soon that is a red flag and I will just use her as that. It is one sided. I should say hold on but sometimes I do not. I use it as a measuring stick of her character. The longer she makes me wait the more likely she is a keeper. Sorry if I sound like a pig but that is the way most guys I know work.

kctiger · Dec 10, 2008, 07:09 AM

Sex should be treated than just more than some fun, random thing to do. I treat it a bit more than that, and I truly think a lot of people should. I refuse to have a one night stand, for this reason. I think it is just complete disrespect and most of the time alcohol is involved. I don't want to regret a decision like that! You just have to stick to your guns and, excuse my phrase, quit being so easy to get in bed...

aisha1989 · Dec 10, 2008, 07:45 AM

Originally Posted by kctiger

Sex should be treated than just more than some fun, random thing to do. I treat it a bit more than that, and I truly think a lot of people should. I refuse to have a one night stand, for this reason. I think it is just complete disrespect and most of the time alcohol is involved. I don't want to regret a decision like that! You just have to stick to your guns and, excuse my phrase, quit being so easy to get in bed...

I agree.. You are easy and get your feelings hurt because you allow it to happen.. Just because you're good looking doesn't mean that guys just want sex. Believe me I know. Hoes will be treated like hoes!

XxMissBxX · Dec 10, 2008, 08:59 AM

This has been my downfall I think, I will just sleep with a guy cause I am so horny and gag to be touched I just do it with who ever offers this is like the first guy who wants to get to know me lots before we have sex and it feels weird cause guys normally just want to get into bed with me and I long to be touched all the time but I know that I have to wait cause that is what he wants and I know this means he is a decent person and that but I don't know how I am going to cope without it

Originally Posted by kctiger

Sex should be treated than just more than some fun, random thing to do. I treat it a bit more than that, and I truly think a lot of people should. I refuse to have a one night stand, for this reason. I think it is just complete disrespect and most of the time alcohol is involved. I don't want to regret a decision like that! You just have to stick to your guns and, excuse my phrase, quit being so easy to get in bed...

talaniman · Dec 10, 2008, 09:13 AM

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...ck-273083.html

You just broke up yesterday, so maybe some healing, and learning to love yourself, is what you need, not another guy, no matter how nice he is.

When the emotional dust settles, you can figure yourself out, and regroup, and rebuild your life.

You need to be happy with yourself, whether you have a guy in your life, or not.