[Alty]

This is worth the read. Made me laugh. FINE! ;)

Women's Words Funny Joke

[Stringer]

This is worth the read. Made me laugh. FINE! ;)

Women's Words Funny Joke

Wow... I can verify every one of those Alty... the one I like best: "Soft Sigh.":)

[Alty]

My personal favorite is "Fine" it works every time. ;)

[Stringer]

Yeah... I've heard that one a few times in my life... Took me a while to understand what that really means... generally you find out shortly after that word is said.

[Alty]

So I helped you Stringer, I gave you a cheat sheet, no more guessing. :);)

[Stringer]

So I helped you Stringer, I gave you a cheat sheet, no more guessing. :);)

Yes, good job, I have heard them all over the years but I never have seen them documented OR in one place before.

[Stringer]

THE LAST THINGS ANY MAN WOULD EVER SAY

10. I am going to work out everyday so I can look good for you.

9. I think Barry Manilow is one cool Dude.

8. While I'm up, can I get you a beer?

7. Her breasts are just way too big.

6. Sometimes I just want to be held.

5. That chick on "Murder, She Wrote" gets me hot!

4. Sure I'd love to wear protection.

3. We haven't been to the mall for ages, let's go shopping
And I can hold your purse. Deck the halls and then to the
Malls

2. Sc**w Monday Night Football, let's watch Murphy Brown.

1. I think we are lost, we better pull over and ask directions.

[ISneezeFunny]

Good lord, I haven't been here in FOREVER.

How is everyone doing? Still alive?

[Stringer]

Hey there Sneezy... how goes it? Good to have you back my friend.

[Alty]

Sneezy, you're supposed to be in bed with Lily. Now get your butt to bed young man or you'll be grumpy tomorrow. ;)

[starbuck8]

Have I got the Island all to myself? Whew!. thank goodness, because I'm going skinny dipping! C'mon Cabana Boyz! Lets take a dip!

[starbuck8]

Here is one that will need verification from our friend M:

Aussie Words

These were results for an Ozwords comp where entrants were asked to take an Australian word, alter it by only one letter, and supply a new and witty definition.

You'll probably need to be an Aussie to understand!

billabonk
to make passionate love beside a waterhole.
bludgie
a partner who doesn't work but is kept as a pet.
dodgeridoo
a fake indigenous artifact.
lyrebard
Ern Malley
matesh*t
all your flat mate's belongings lying strewn around the floor.
licky
a day off you get by asking the boss nicely.
barramondi
the sickie taken after Sunday, for the purpose of fishing.
fair drinkum
good quality Aussie wine.
klangaroo
the sound a roo makes when it hits your bull bar.
flatypus
a cat which has been run over by a vehicle.
yabble
the unintelligible language of Australian freshwater crustaceans.
carlton drift
the wayward walk home from the pub
bushwanker
a pretentious drongo who reckons he's above average when it comes to handling himself in the scrub.
shornbag
a sheila with a brazillian wax.

Batman!?

Can I have a licky so I can go billabonk, followed by a fair drinkum and a shornbag and another billabonk. Then I can carleton drift, step over the flatypus, and return to my bludgie, and trip over the matesh*t, and the bushwanker? After all of this, I may need another licky, and a baramondi! :D

Can you get back to me on that... lickety split?

[Chery]

Wow, look at all them there pages! Unfortunately, still have fever and chills, so got to protect my Alex and his parents for a few more days. It hardly ever goes the way we want when we look forward to something, that's just the way life is sometimes - and I'm sure all of you have had 'those days' also.

Going backwards to read them all, and have a few comments to make.

Stringer and Alty, - just love your joyful jokes and stories - you two are really fun to read.

And Rebbie, your post #130 - I know how my MOSTEST (Stringer) can be when he opens his heart and soul, I really do. He and Marta mean so much to me and we have become very close through our emails. The wonderful cards and other things they've sent me are so prescious and I can't wait to one day be surprised by a phone-call.

Stringer darling, closing my ears would not have stopped the tears in my eyes after reading your post #129!
I love you all just the way you are, and don't expect anything... just keep sending post cards so that Alexander winds up having the biggest collection from all over the world. That's all I dreamed of when I made my request. All of you wonderful 'kids' have enriched my life so darned much, that it's beyond words - and I send every one of you great big Virtual Hugs every time I read your posts here or on the other threads you started for me. I so appreciate all the warmth and loving - and your prayers - which have helped me stay strong and wrapped with such emotional warmth, which I admit, makes me cry tears of wonder and joy sometimes. I sincerely and humbly thank you all for this for the rest of my life!

Dear Spidy,, I may not live in the States, but my heart is always there. This country I live in is just a geographical mistake and has nothing at all to do with my loyalty and love. I wound up staying here because of my mother (a mistake), and now I'm here because my wonderful daughter is here with her family... But, otherwise if it were not for the good health insurance, I'd be over in Las Vegas with my brother in a minute.
As I said before, life does not always wind up the way we'd like, but we just have to make the best of it.
I sure hope you had help driving all that far.. having this flu can really bring you down, got it myself and it feels downright awefull! Hope you get better soon. As Friend said, you and Zach can be on at the same time, just open up two browsers, even the same type - no problem - just different logons. That's what they mean by 'multi-tasking'. I have Internet Explorer and Firefox open at the same time when needed. My smileys work on one, but not the other, so I have to switch between the two sometimes. That art from Tool is cool. There is a lot of talent there..

Starby honey, I hope you and Nicki survive all that noise and dirt out there right now. Get upset all you want and get some rest when they take a break. Just document what happened and try to take pictures, then sue the city Until then - Just close your eyes and come to our island as often as you can to relax a little my dear. Maybe we can all have a crab cook-out and enjoy the sunset on the beach.
Going to have to wait for my turkey until we are all over this flu.. but it will taste good, no matter what day it is, as long as it's with the whole family this year. Then, there's always Christmas dinner to look forward to.

Wow, Sneezy, I see you found the island. What do you think about all them jewels falling out of the sky? Nope, it not due to the medications you've been taking lately, honest - they are for real..

And Friend.. I just love what you do with graphics you post. What program are you using? I have PaintShopPro 9 and still have not discovered all of the power it has. Wearing shoes like that would at least make it easy for me to look people in the eye instead of getting a krink in my neck all the time, but with my current medications I don't think I'd be able to stand long...

KBC.. you have a happy turkey day too. Maybe we can come up with our own holiday with our skeletal friends here on the Island. We just have to come up with a proper name for it - and any religion is invited - no exceptions or exemptions here. I guess Grateful Multi-national Day would be a little too long, so some of you will have to come up with something better. As long as it's a happy and peaceful day, right?
And the world would be a boring place without music. I love all kinds at certain occasions. Just not into the ones where you cannot understand the words and shakes the cars miles down the road. I don't like Appalacian git-fiddle music much either - even though my Dad came from Hazzard, Kentucky.
So, a Gemini like you wanders around asking for 'input, input, input'.. I think they made a few movies about that subject. I too am always looking for new things to learn and do. My mind still works fine and is always out there looking. I think it better than letting it go to waste as with many in this world with blinders on..

OK, Rebbie... If you go to the album of pictures of the Island, click on them to enlarge, you'll see that our neighbors are dancing skeletons, and when they do dance, jewels fall from the sky. It took me a while to figure out this album a bit, but I think I got the crux of it. So, when you point your mouse at the picture, you can read a caption under it and also enlarge it. Try it out so that you can see the skeletons. If that does not work, let me know and I'll post a bigger picture of our neighbors... I really did not want to mess with anyone's mind here, and hope this explains it. I'm still working on the film to post. My flu has just got the better of me still, and it's the weekend already. So, when Alexander wakes up, I'll have to call him and tell him his Ama is still sick... darn it! Maybe tomorrow.. we'll see. Cross your fingers, please.

OK, I've gone back as far as I could to catch up, and phew! Am done. It sure is wonderful to see all of you having a great time here.

Just one thought... hope those 'girls' that came to visit don't come too often, it might not be good for Stringer... if you know me or Marta... we want to keep him alive a little longer, and it's not really good for his high blood pressure or the pressure from Marta if they show up more than once a year.

OK.. this has taught me not to stay away from you too long or I'll have a lot of reading - and writing - to catch up on.

Hope this didn't put any of you to sleep... speaking of sleep - yup, that's where I'm going again to work on getting rid of this stupid fever..


Oh, and there are enough hidden nooks and bays where we can all skinny dip - it's OK on this island. I just won't though because I don't like sand in all of my wrinkles...


C.U. beautiful people later...

Ahhh, this sure beats the lousy weather in Germany...

[Chery]

Here's the updated link to both of my albums so that you don't have to look far to find them.


Ask Me Help Desk - Chery's Albums


And it does work if you click on the pictures, they enlarge... so you'll see all.

Love,

[Chery]

OMG Starby.. your post about that 'lickity split' request has totally bumfuddled me!

You must have gotten a little rest to be so bright and funny this early in the morning. I just love what you came up with!

[starbuck8]

I sure hope that nasty flu goes away soon Momma! I've got my fingers, toes, arms, legs, eyes,. can you cross your ears? (lol)... and saying many prayers and sending good vibes your way, so you and Alex and the kids can spend time with Ama and Mum! Feel better my sweets!

Oops... did you catch me skinny dipping with the Cabana Boyz? I thought I was all alone here. No selling them pics on eBay now okay? I know they are priceless... but I'm a little shy! Hahahaha!

I was thinking of calling you again tonight, but I didn't want to wake or bother you while you're not feeling well. :)

[starbuck8]

OMG Starby.. your post about that 'lickity split' request has totally bumfuddled me!

You must have gotten a little rest to be so bright and funny this early in the morning. I just love what you came up with!

Hee hee! I had a power nap earlier. It's 1am here now... and of course I'm wide awake now! I've got dirt up my nose from the dust pile... so I'm sneezin away, and my eyes are itchy! So I will likely be awake now for hrs again! :rolleyes:

I like to do things lickety split... LOL!

[Chery]

I sure hope that nasty flu goes away soon Momma!! I've got my fingers, toes, arms, legs, eyes,....can you cross your ears? (lol)...and saying many prayers and sending good vibes your way, so you and Alex and the kids can spend time with Ama and Mum! Feel better my sweets!!

Oops...did you catch me skinny dipping with the Cabana Boyz? I thought I was all alone here. No sellin them pics on ebay now okay? I know they are priceless...but I'm a little shy! Hahahaha!!

I was thinking of calling you again tonight, but I didn't want to wake or bother you while you're not feeling well. :)

I promise not to make them pics public honey... I respect privacy just as much as we all do. Besides, I confess that I forgot my camera as I didn't want any sand to get into it. I usually protect my camera and handy from damage as much as possible.

My handy worked! It is quad-band - my brother called me on it from his, but it's like 60 cents a minute. So he called me on my regular phone and it was only 7 cents a minute. It was just wonderful to hear from him again, I miss him so.

I too hope this flu thing gets gone soon, I want to at least see them for a while tomorrow. I hope that some chicken broth, lots of aspirin and orange juice help.. and then of course lots and lots of sleep, if my bones let me.

I bet you are adjusting your schedule to the construction workers - but I hope that they don't work on the weekend, so that you at least get some rest then. Don't forget good batteries for your flashlight when out at night.. don't want anyone falling into their mess.

Call me any time honey, I love your special little giggles!

Ah, and I thought only the Aussies use that term... I'm learning.

[Alty]

I usually protect my camera and handy from damage as much as possible

Aw, Momma, you made me homesick. The word handy, I can hear my cousins using that term. :)

Shhh, I don't think anyone else knows what you and I are talking about. Shall we keep it as our little secret? ;)

[theguywithnolife]

Well, Sorry I haven't been on
I'm off to go shopping at Opry Mills and look at Christmas lights with my Church until 9

Finally, Plans! =D
Then, I'll come back and relax.