[confused25]

All right so I wanted to start a thread on tips for a first date. This might benefit the guys more since, from my experience, the guy usually is the one who is trying to impress the girl with a nice first date, BUT that's just my experience. ALL input is appreciated, from both men and women!

Questions:
1. What's a good place to take someone? A location that is fun, unique, and will wow the date.

2. What's a bad place you should never take someone because it's overdone, uninteresting, or just not fun?

3. What kind of things do you suggest to talk about? That way there is never any uncomfortable silence.

4. What kind of topics should you stay clear of? That way they don't scare their date away.

5. Finally, first-date kissing, yes or no? If you know for a fact your date wants to be kissed (your getting all the right vibes) should you do it, or leave the person wanting more and just ask for a second date?


Like I said all input is great. Advice is not constricted to the questions above. Remember this will be helpful for everyone, not just me, so feel free to share good and bad first date stories and offer any other type of advice you'd like to add. Thanks!

[knowidon'tknow]

Oh, man - waiting for answers to this one. You know, Barbara Walters wrote a book years ago called "How to Talk to Anyone About Anything" - probably out of print, but damned useful for life in general. Have to dig it out and read it again. Yeah, wacky ideas for first dates, guys. Be fun. Attentive.

Ladies only: kissing OK but hold off as long as possible before having sex, girls - weeks! - drives them wild with desire. Hard to get still works. The time-honored art of female manipulation is misunderstood and unjustly maligned. It maintains the propagation of the human race.

[Wildcat21]

"Trying to impress the girl" - Nope - never. Wrong foot already.

No white table clothes. I highly advise against any dinner.

It's about having fun, NO Pressure, laughing - GETTING TO KNOW THEM.

LISTENING!! Listen to her. Did I say listen to her?

Seriously - guy does 30% of the talking - Girls 70%

Did I remind the guys to listen??

Go on a cheap date - MONEY DOESN'T matter... if she's looking for a fancy dinner - FORGET ABOUT HER.

Dinners are BORING!! Unless it's highly different ot unusual.

YES - kiss on the first date. I 10000% agree - no sex... sometimes it works out, but usually not.

Oh yeah... make sure to smile right away.

Compliment her... but NOT too much. One or two.

Don't spene hours on the phone with her either - that never works. BORING!!

[valinors_sorrow]

A great deal of dating is very subjective though... what works for one person may not for the next. The first date with who I eventually fell in love with and married was a casual dinner at a mexican restaurant and a walk on the beach. What impressed me the most was his easy going candidness and his attention to detail in addition to his Paul Newmanish good looks. And he smelled good, like clean sheets. LOL

I hope that helps but it may be that it just worked for me.. . Shrugs.

PS - We were very slow with each other on many levels being keenly aware of the gun-shy effect spectacular failure had made in each of us. That first kiss was several months worth of very casual dating in the making and OH BOY was it worth the wait!! I can say having done it both ways that it is indeed a very special pleasure to make love for the first time with someone you know very very well.

[confused25]

Anyway we can move this to the "Relationship" or "Dating" section? I think we would get more responses that way. Thanks!

[talaniman]

Amusement parks Comedy clubs sporting events parties with friends dance clubs let your hair down girl lets go!

[Cassie]

Val is right, different people, different interests. I grew up living close to snow, one first date was a sleigh ride to a restaurant. It was great fun. One guy took me cross country skiing in the moonlight. When we got to the top of the mountain, his friends had taken a basket of great treats and warm drinks. Arts in the park, when they have music going on. Even a movie and a burger can be fun. Go for an ice cream, everybody loves ice cream :) A zoo. Dancing is always fun. Overkill is bad, A gentleman asked me to dinner, when he picked me up we went to the airport, he flew me to San Franciso for dinner. It was nice, but I felt it was too much for a first date or even a second date.

The love of my life and I met at a juice shop after I had been exercising and we talked as if we had know each other forever. I walked each day after working out and he would often Pop up. We would walk and talk and laugh. I started looking forward to seeing him to tell him about something that had happened whether funny, sad, or just life. He said the same. We went out on a date... but we really had been dating. So the simpliest of times can be the best.

The important thing is to date, get to know each other. I'd wait for that first kiss. Romance is a wonderful thing. To date, anticipate the first kiss. Don't do it on the first date, think about it, let her think about it. When you kiss her it will mean more. Hold hands, be thoughtful, ask her about herself, her family, work, hobbies, childhood, and tell her about yourself. It is OK to have a quiet moment of holding her hand and smile and say what a wonderful time you are having with her. If you feel pressured to talk all of the time, you are going to babble some. I am a great listener and some people think they know me very well, when in fact they don't know much about me, but I know everything about them. Be a good listener.

Sex, well I think sex has nothing to do with dating. Dating is to get to know each other... sex takes it to another dimension altogether. Check out the post Val had on realtionship/dating. Some really good advice. I know sex is easy these days, but that is just it, too easy. Date and have fun.