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    cookies1399's Avatar
    cookies1399 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Nov 17, 2008, 07:30 PM
    Telling your ex about his new girlfriend talking to her ex
    I dated this guy for about 3 years and things just weren't going allthat well anymore we saw each other everyday at work. We had to work right beside each other everyday.to make a long story short we broke up and he started dating another co worker shortly after. Her ex also works there and recently she was seen talking to her ex at work,she does not work in the same building as us,so she made a special trip to see him. Should I tell my ex about this? I don't want to see him hurt.
    myheart0345's Avatar
    myheart0345 Posts: 34, Reputation: 3
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    #2

    Nov 17, 2008, 07:43 PM

    I would just stay out of it. Unless you guys stayed good friends. But you can also look like the crazy ex trying to break up his new relationship.
    neverme's Avatar
    neverme Posts: 1,430, Reputation: 270
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    #3

    Nov 17, 2008, 07:47 PM

    Go with your gut. Tell him.
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
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    #4

    Nov 17, 2008, 07:58 PM

    I'd stay out of it.
    friend4u178's Avatar
    friend4u178 Posts: 3,349, Reputation: 1584
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    #5

    Nov 17, 2008, 08:16 PM

    What are you hoping to gain by telling him??

    I'd stay out of it!!
    neverme's Avatar
    neverme Posts: 1,430, Reputation: 270
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    #6

    Nov 17, 2008, 08:18 PM

    Why does it have to be a gain for her?. I'm sorry but wouldn't you like to know?

    Although all this is dependent on you guys having a amicable relationship now...

    If not stay well away.
    friend4u178's Avatar
    friend4u178 Posts: 3,349, Reputation: 1584
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    #7

    Nov 17, 2008, 08:33 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by neverme View Post
    Why does it have to be a gain for her?.
    I asked in case she was trying to get some communication going between herself and her Ex to patch things up. Not saying that's the case but it's common.

    Quote Originally Posted by neverme View Post
    ...I'm sorry but wouldn't you like to know?.
    I doubt I would believe my Ex and would just think they were trying to stir the pot.
    neverme's Avatar
    neverme Posts: 1,430, Reputation: 270
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    #8

    Nov 17, 2008, 08:42 PM

    Friend4u178,

    Do you not have one relationship you've amicably broken up from that allows you to still trust the person you spent a sizable portion of your life with?

    And as I said :Although all this is dependent on you guys having a amicable relationship now...

    If not stay well away.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #9

    Nov 17, 2008, 08:50 PM

    You have no idea what they were talking about, it may have been something important, or they may have been a reason for them to be together that day.

    Your belief that it was something is just that opinion, you want someone telling your new friend if you happened to talk to your ex.

    You do not know enough to do anything but stay out of it.
    With that also it seems you may be more wanting to break them up than protect anyone. But that is just what it seems like by the little info given.
    friend4u178's Avatar
    friend4u178 Posts: 3,349, Reputation: 1584
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    #10

    Nov 17, 2008, 09:03 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by neverme View Post
    Friend4u178,

    Do you not have one relationship you've amicably broken up from that allows you to still trust the person you spent a sizable portion of your life with?.
    Absolutely , I actually don't have an Ex who I am not friends with NOW! However when 2 people split the one that has been dumped will generally do all sorts of stupid stuff that they regret later when the emotional dust has settled.

    In short my point being if the OP was trying to gain something from this whether that be recommunication , or trying to break up the Ex's current relationship etc etc.

    Quote Originally Posted by neverme View Post
    And as I said :Although all this is dependent on you guys having a amicable relationship now...

    If not stay well away.
    I agree with you neverme , and we could probably do with some more information from the OP on this.
    neverme's Avatar
    neverme Posts: 1,430, Reputation: 270
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    #11

    Nov 17, 2008, 09:08 PM

    Okay, I get you now! :D
    friend4u178's Avatar
    friend4u178 Posts: 3,349, Reputation: 1584
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    #12

    Nov 17, 2008, 09:14 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by neverme View Post
    Okay, i get ya now! :D
    LOL... good to see we're now on the same page :)
    cookies1399's Avatar
    cookies1399 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #13

    Nov 18, 2008, 11:42 AM
    I was the one who broke off our relationship. I deeply care for him still as a friend and just don't want to see him hurt by this girl. I believe she still is in love with her ex and would go back to him given the chance. I am just afraid he is going to be badly hurt. I guess it really isn't my problem though. I would would hope he would have my back if he new my new boyfriend was doing something suspicious. Do you just stop caring about someone because it didn't work out?
    cookies1399's Avatar
    cookies1399 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #14

    Nov 18, 2008, 11:49 AM

    I have nothing to gain by saying anything to him. He may think I'm trying to start trouble and stop being friends with me. If I just wanted to break them up I wouldn't be asking for advice on whether or not I should say anything!!
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #15

    Nov 18, 2008, 12:52 PM

    She is talking to her ex and you are still talking to your ex that is now her boyfriend.

    Sometimes people make a big deal out of nothing. I could see if she was caught kissing her ex but what is the harm in talking?

    Now unless you over heard the conversation and was unfriendly that's different. You stated she is still in love with her ex but some might think the same about you. Also, I am sure other people know they are togther and if they saw this would've most likely brought it to his attention.

    Lastly, why he everyone getting involved with each other at work. Your ex and this girl are on their 2nd work place relationship and both of their exes work there too. Stay out of it!
    cookies1399's Avatar
    cookies1399 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #16

    Nov 18, 2008, 01:54 PM

    Point taken!
    Kitten78's Avatar
    Kitten78 Posts: 48, Reputation: 4
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    #17

    Nov 18, 2008, 02:04 PM

    Unless you see them being intimate with each other I would stay out of it.

    But that dosen't mean you can't keep your eye on her.
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