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Sherin333 · Nov 10, 2008, 01:42 PM

But what if he wants to see me or hook up to talk? Which he probably won't but we do't know that. That is where I am compltley ignorant and am so bloody confused with this

Sherin333 · Nov 10, 2008, 01:43 PM

Grrr

kctiger · Nov 10, 2008, 01:44 PM

I can't offer you anymore advice. Just go with it and be strong. You can do it... bloody? Are you from America or England?

Sherin333 · Nov 10, 2008, 01:46 PM

I am a Torontonian with Irish parents:)

kctiger · Nov 10, 2008, 01:47 PM

Got to love the Irish. I too have a lot of it in my blood. The good thing is that we always know how to drink after a hard day!

Sherin333 · Nov 10, 2008, 01:49 PM

Yes yes we do. But I find that makes me more emotional so I try to steer clear from the drink, if you know what I mean. But yes, God Bless the Irish!

Sherin333 · Nov 11, 2008, 08:30 AM

Morning, I couldn't sleep at al l last night I woke at 3 and have been tossing and turning since:( I had weird dreams about him that we met and he was so shady and mean to me. I feel like today. Missed a test this morning. Not feeling the hottest.

kctiger · Nov 11, 2008, 08:35 AM

Morning sunshine!! What you are going through is to be expected. Happened to me too, so don't feel bad. Takes time, like we have said. Also, take Tylenol PM about two hours before you go to bed. It is a non addictive medicine that can help you fall asleep pretty quick. No, it is not bad for you either.

Sherin333 · Nov 11, 2008, 08:39 AM

Everything he said to me that night on the phone is repeating in my head " I can't see myself with you for the rest of my life", " i love myself too much t keep this going', " you are so hard to get through too". Why so cruel, all I did was have insecurity and jealousy issues I never hurt him like that.

kctiger · Nov 11, 2008, 08:45 AM

Like I said, it is still fresh on your mind and will be there as long as you let it. Get up and do something. Take a long walk, something that will force your mind to focus on something else. Easier said than done, I know.

Sherin333 · Nov 11, 2008, 08:55 AM

I feel so mad and angry at him right now for doing this. If he did call I don't know if I would want to talk, it would be so weird and sucha useless conversation. I'm just venting I know and I know that it is still very fresh but my God,I don't understand why this is happening. I did everything for him and loved him unconditionally and he dumped me! Go figure. I have such animosity towards him, and his sister as close as we were she hasn't emailed me or called to see how I'm doing? She knew too that I didn't want this. I feel sick over this situation and could vomit every time I think of it!!

kctiger · Nov 11, 2008, 08:57 AM

I believe there are four stages/emotions of a break up: anger, denial, depression and sadness (not really in that order)... wonder which one you are in...

Sherin333 · Nov 11, 2008, 09:11 AM

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
I would have to say a teaspoon of denial, a tablespoon of depression, a cup of sadness and room full of anger. Grrrrr

All jokes aside, I miss him:(

kctiger · Nov 11, 2008, 09:14 AM

This is my last comment on this thread as it seems bordering on insanity how much I have posted:

Hope: this isn't just any old word. You can hope for different things. In a break up, you should NEVER hope you get your ex back. That is just up to God, and up to life. What you HOPE for is that you get better. You hope you can heal from this... you hope you can move on... you hope you can be stronger at the end... you hope life isn't really this unfair... you hope the pain goes away... and lastly, you hope to someday be happy.

That is the hope that matters, and that is the hope that will get you somewhere. Start on this track, and let life take care of the rest.

Sherin333 · Nov 11, 2008, 09:18 AM

:) Thanks

Sherin333 · Nov 12, 2008, 12:21 PM

It's been 3 and a half weeks, with NC and I feel weird. I feel like we are fading from each other. I don't want this to happen.

kctiger · Nov 12, 2008, 12:23 PM

That is the point of NC. It is emotional detox... If you are an alcoholic and go to detox, you will eventually start to lose the craving. Same thing here.

Sherin333 · Nov 12, 2008, 12:46 PM

This is a forced feeling, I have to force myself to move on and forward without him. He doesn't know what he wants or thinks at this time that he doesn't want me. I know I WANT him, and I WANT us to be together but I have to push all my feelings into this deep dark detox hole and move ahead with my life? That doesn't seem right. I feel like shouldn't shouldn't feel these feelings, but I do because I love him, he doesn't love me, and it was me who got dumped. I understand that the greatest strength comes from the weakest point, but I am forced to move on, I am forced to stop thinking of him, I am forced to push him out of my head and life...

Sherin333 · Nov 13, 2008, 08:27 PM

I am sooooooooooooooo drunk right now and am turning to this site instead of doing something syupid like calling him right now. I miss him, I love him, he doesn't know what he is missing!! SUcker!!

kctiger · Nov 14, 2008, 06:22 AM

Stay away from the booze if you can... Poor decisions can come from it, but since you didn't contact him and posted here, it seems you are mature enough to handle it. Keep on chugging along. It will get better.