[mooky1]

I'm a 28 years old woman, just got married last year. Me and my hausband love each others so much, I can't even imagine living without him! I just got to a graduate school on August which I been waiting for it to happen in a long time, but the school which I got into is in another state, so I had to move to another state, but my huasband couldn't move because of his job! Also, the school that I'm atteding, right now only offers private loan, which about a month ago found out that just for the first year loan that I took, I would have to pay $1000 a month for 15 years when I would get graduated, and it's only for the first year! ( the school is gone be 4 years). My hausband thinks that I should quit the school and apply some where else, while I don't know what I should do because I already paid $20,000 plus the interest for the tuition which I would not get it back, and also at the same time I'm very happy with the fact that finally I got into the school that I wanted to for a long time! And I'm not sure if I quit this school I would get into another school or not! Also, I need to have my degree inorder to pay for my parents which spent all their retirement money for me and my sister! But at the same time I don't know what to do, because if I would have to get this loan for 4 years, upon graduation I would have to pay $4000/month just to pay for my loan, and as I'm deciding to have a baby upon graduation, I would not be able to work full time! Plus I do not want to loose my marriage because of the long distance between me and my hausband and also the fact that he thinks this school is not financially worth it! Please let me know what do you guys think! I really don't know what to do and I'm so depressed about it!

[starbuck8]

WOW! I know education is expensive, but may I ask what career it is that you are choosing, and what Ivey league university you are attending? I wonder if I'm understanding you right. For the first yr. you have to pay $1000 a month, and then for the next 4 yrs you have to pay $4000 a month for 15 yrs? I must be misunderstanding.

Then when you get your degree, you will have a baby and stay home and be out of work? I'm hoping you are married to Donald Trump? ;)

That is an awfully big strain to put on a new marriage, especially when you are not even living together in the same place. Your husband must be feeling the huge pressure of that. I realise that you want to get your education, but I would seriously weigh that against the incredible pressure and problems this is going to bring to your marriage, and your future family.

If you are already depressed about it, imagine what it will be like after more time apart from your husband, the pressure of all of the bills, and that's not to mention the pressure of studying and cramming for exams.

An LD relationship and issues that come up, could possibly lead to the end of your marriage, and if not, your husband would be so busy working to help pay off your student loans, and could get very resentful. Then add a baby to the mix? Where is the baby's college fund going to come from when you have so many other things to worry about paying. I would really give this some thought before you are way in over your head.

[JBeaucaire]

Dreams are an amazingly motivating thing. They often motivate us right into the poor house.

A person should get the education they can afford. The only thing you haven't outright admitted in that post above is the truth... you can't afford to pay $4000+ per month for a student loan on your husband's salary. Can you?

Education... great! Marriage... awesome! Children... the best! But people who glide through life ignoring how their dreams interact and change are headed for disaster.

You've already committed to this year, loans and all, so no quitting. PASS those classes, get those credits.

Then you should stop and evaluate. Your life plan needs to make sense on paper, too. A graduate education that costs $100,000 is absurd unless you plan includes a job that pays off that debt immediately. Parenting doesn't do that.

Worse, as soon as you have accumulated all this debt you're going to stop the career altogether for an undetermined length? So, you are shackling your family with debt that won't be improving anyone's life? It's just draining your family's monthly resources?

This is the definition of crazy, isn't it?

I'm not telling you to abandon graduate school, I'm telling you to get the education that you and your husband and your kids can afford. Do THAT.

[talaniman]

Higher educations is expensive, and you need a plan that fits your budgetary needs, and allows you to balance home, and school, or you will have to give one of them up. That simple.

Your digging a deep hole of debt, and stressing a new marriage to a breaking point.

You need tp prioritize, and get a more practical plan. Adults compromise, and make adjustments based on facts everyday, so can you.

[Fr_Chuck]

I had the issue from the first line, where you were going to leave your husband to go to school.

So school is more important than your family, why can't he move and find a job there?

Why can't you go to a school closer to home.