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    vipriya's Avatar
    vipriya Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Nov 2, 2008, 04:47 AM
    My mistake
    My mistake was I had a french kiss with an another guy... it was all unintentinal... I was drunk and I didn't realised... after a really long time... I accepted the truth to my love... he is totally broken... now he don't want to settle with me... I love him to the core... I have askes thousands of apolozies... I cannot stay wihtout him... we were in relation for 7 years... help me to make him realise that it was not intentionally... I know I have hurted him lot... I want heal them... but not going away from him... I am really regretting for the mistake... I know I am wrong I need him.. badly... I am love with him madly... I don't know what should I do...
    confuse_lakshya's Avatar
    confuse_lakshya Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #2

    Nov 2, 2008, 05:43 AM

    Look you have made a mistake , now the thing is that how can you make your partner realize your apology. Its simple. I can tell you a simple solution for this. Describe him everything from the start and promise him that you won't do this ever again even in your dream you can't imagine this kind of activity now. Look your relationship is for about 7 yrs now, he must be a little understanding that he can believe what you are trying to convey.so just in simple manner convey him, have a chat with him. Probably give him a present he likes most. And promise him that you won't do that again. A little patience is what you need and I know that this is not a big mistake you have done, you were not conscious that time. Tell him frankly, he will be able to accept you again after seeing your love to him. OK.
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
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    #3

    Nov 2, 2008, 10:05 AM

    I think you should apologize one more time and tell him that the reason you told him to begin with was because you would not have felt right if he didn't know and that even though it was your mistake he deserved the truth, and you gave him the truth because you respected him enough to do that. Then tell him, your going to leave him be for awhile and let him think about it and if he wants to come back together that would mean a lot to you, but you understand he has to make the decision and you will now respect his decision. Then I'd do exactly that, leave him be for awhile and see where it goes.

    I've never really been in that situation, so I don't know exactly what he'd do, but maybe after a few days or week he'd calm down. Although, I have also take his side and say that to me kissing is still cheating, and I'm sure he's hurt by it.
    vipriya's Avatar
    vipriya Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #4

    Nov 3, 2008, 01:55 AM

    I have apolozised him more than thousands of times... I have tried all my level best to make him understand things... I have hurted him a lot... he says that he don't trust me anymore and don't want to... but my 7 years of realtion with him was like married couple... our proirity was always each other nothing else... well for time being I am giving him a space... its been month I spoke to him... but still we both ask about each other to our friends... right now he is so occupied that he hardly gets a time to think about this... but I will do anything to win his trust , love... he is my life... I am regretting so badly...
    TrueFaith's Avatar
    TrueFaith Posts: 1,202, Reputation: 313
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    #5

    Nov 3, 2008, 02:09 AM

    I was drunk and didn't know..
    Sigh..

    Look if he does not want you back there is not much you can do but to give him space.
    Nothing you can say or do
    Will win his trust back.

    There is no magic word here to fix this
    JBeaucaire's Avatar
    JBeaucaire Posts: 5,426, Reputation: 997
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    #6

    Nov 3, 2008, 02:14 AM

    If you're sorry you did it, then fine. Stop telling him he has to forgive you, he doesn't. But you have to be sorry without rationalizing.

    The only thing worse than someone apologizing for something they did wrong is them telling you how it really wasn't their fault, too. UGH!

    You "unintentionally" french kissed a guy? Do you have any idea how non-credible that sounds? Don't even bother saying it, never again. Just stick with, "I'm sorry, I'm an idiot, I should be spanked unmercifully."

    Then ask him to spank you... with a little devilish smile.

    Seriously, stop making excuses. If you WERE married to this guy and french kissed someone else, you'd be facing divorce proceedings if that was his choice.

    So take a chill pill. Apologize and then STOP apologizing. He gets it... you're sorry. Now let him decide what he's going to do.

    You may have blown it with him, we'll see. You'll have to accept that if it happen. And THAT'S what it really means to be sorry. In which case it will be a good life lesson, huh? No more drunken-goofing off with men NOT your boyfriend... you clearly can't handle that situation. Lesson learned, hopefully.
    vipriya's Avatar
    vipriya Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Nov 3, 2008, 02:28 AM

    I am giving him a space... is there not a single ray of hope...
    JBeaucaire's Avatar
    JBeaucaire Posts: 5,426, Reputation: 997
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    #8

    Nov 3, 2008, 09:24 AM

    Rays of hope? How about setting the melodrama up on a shelf and leave it there?

    You want to believe in something? The only thing you can BET on is that actions have consequences. That includes yours.

    Grownups must be able to face the music of what they do without expectation of special treatment. We aren't THAT special that just saying "I'm sorry" makes everything go back to normal (or our idea of what normal is).

    The "ray of hope" you use to get through every day is simple - "I am smarter than I was yesterday. I am not a creature of uncontrollable habits. I am an overcomer...whatever problems I face of my own making or the universe's, I will surpass them and be better for it. I don't need to get my way as long as I get a clue with each thing I learn about life and myself. I believe I can and will survive all these trials and tribulations, even the ones I brought on myself."

    Believe THAT.
    BMI's Avatar
    BMI Posts: 892, Reputation: 270
    Senior Member
     
    #9

    Nov 3, 2008, 09:30 AM

    If the intent was to not kiss him no amount of booze in the world would have "forced" you to do it.

    I'd leave out the booze and figure out why you were tempted to commit this act. Booze has nothing to do with it.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #10

    Nov 3, 2008, 09:31 AM
    Ask Me Help Desk - Search Results

    How many different posts do you need to cry on!! :confused:
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
    Pets Expert
     
    #11

    Nov 3, 2008, 09:41 AM

    Okay, wait. In this thread the OP claims she kissed another guy. In her other thread she slept with another guy, which is it?

    OP, there is nothing you can say or do to force him to take you back. You made a huge mistake, whether you kissed someone else, or slept with someone else (whichever story is the truth), you betrayed a 7 year relationship, one that you obviously didn't care too much about the night you decided to cheat.

    The ball is in his court, and there is nothing you can do but wait and hope.

    Some people can forgive a cheating partner, some people can't. I myself would never be able to forgive my husband if he cheated. Do I love him? With all my heart. But, remaining faithful is one thing that we as human beings have complete control over.

    There is no such thing as accidentally cheating on someone, no matter what.

    You did the crime, now it's time to face the consequences, for better or for worse.

    Good luck.
    Romefalls19's Avatar
    Romefalls19 Posts: 4,739, Reputation: 1130
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    #12

    Nov 3, 2008, 09:56 AM

    Since you have 2 posts of basically the same pity party, I will give you the same saying "You made your bed so sleep in it" Just stop, you make it seem like he HAS to forgive you because you apologize, sorry hunnie, that's not how life works

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