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stacy iza · Oct 30, 2008, 09:33 AM

hi I'm 15 and I go out with my boyfriend for a month now. We used to be best friends before and he always liked me so I gave him a chance. At first I didn't like him so I broke up with him after a week. But when I broke up with him I realized I loved him so I talked to him and asked if he wanted to get back together. At first he said he didn't know because during the days we weren't together I was being really rude and fighting all the time but I explained to him it was only because I wanted him back. So he took me back. The first weeks he was the best guy on earth but then we had our first fight. He smokes and that bothers me a lot and it bringing us apart now I don't know what to do because our relatioship just got cold and we don't talk and he doesn't care about me anymore and I'm getting hurt but I love him so much so I don't know if I should take a break or juss break up... or juss don't worry at all! I'm hurt I cry all the time and I don't know what to do! Help me I want him to be after me not me waiting for him...
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plzz help me...

450donn · Oct 30, 2008, 11:22 AM

I think you are equating infactuation with love. You do not love him. You want to be around him for ? He smokes and you don't like it? Then move on. You are only 15 and have lots of years ahead of you. Don't even think about tying yourself to him at this young age.

jrsg · Oct 30, 2008, 01:59 PM

Well, you sound intelligent enough to know the negative aspects of smoking, so I think it is safe to say you won't gain his bad habits.

Anyway, it is something of concern. Just tell him you don't like him smoking. Talk to him about it. Mention that you don't want the relationship to continue if his behaviour continues and then see what he has to say.

Give him the chance to stop,
Even help him stop,
If he doesn't, you did all you could, and you can be proud of that. Then you can move on from him, and hopefully find someone even better.

Good luck, and let us know how it goes :)

Troubled_Girl · Oct 30, 2008, 02:29 PM

A while back I had a similar situation

My boyfriend smoked all the time and I always told him I didn't like it but he never really understood my haterid toward the smell and how trashy it would make him look. Instead of dealing with my feelings and talking to him about it I just broke up with him. And I have so much regret!

My advice to you is that you should explain to him how you feel about it and tell him you don't want him to change who he is for you but if he loves you than he should try to make an effort to not smoke as much. That's progress right there but if he just gets mad and saids no than he obviously doesn't care for you like you do him and you deserve way better!

SimpleguyJoe · Oct 30, 2008, 05:02 PM

Your young still, as am I but point being you need to realize some people just don't click well together. It's nothing personal against either of you maybe if things are not to late just be friends. It's ONLY been a month that's nothing in most peoples eyes so try to repair the friendship bridge if you want him in your life.

What I meant saying some people don't click is that he smokes you don't, your lifes have different morals, pace and goals. If you don't have at least some of these basic things on the same page your bound to fail because you have nothing to hold you together but your hopes and dreams and in the real qorld they are not quite as strong as we thought them to be.

Maybe down the road when he matures a little because NOTHING you say or do will change his habbits until HE realizes that its not going to get him anywhere and that its bad for him. Im sure he is more caught up with his friends and image more than a serious girl at this age any ways.