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ajrnkcs · Oct 18, 2008, 06:16 PM

OK I'm 15 and my mother is in prison I've been living with my father for about 3 years.he is very strict and has some different issues.not to go in to detail.but I've just gound out I'm pregnant and I know if I let my father know he will take it bad and try to make me give it up or get an abortion.plus he has a temper and I don't want my father of the baby to be hurt or otherwise. I live in Kentucky and want to get emancipated.my fathers friend knows I'm pregnant and has said she will take me and the baby in if I get emancipated. Is that possible??

J_9 · Oct 18, 2008, 06:19 PM

To get emancipated you have to prove that you have a job and can live on your own in an apartment or house... not live with a friend.

I understand your father being upset about this. You are in no way able to raise a child as you are a child yourself.

How old is the father of the baby?

ScottGem · Oct 18, 2008, 07:09 PM

As J_9 said, you woudn't qualify for emancipation. I might also point out that father couldn't be that strict if you managed to get pregnant. Either that or you ignored his rules.

In any case, you need to tell him right away. He cannot force you to give up the child or get an abortion. He might surprise you.

Fr_Chuck · Oct 18, 2008, 07:31 PM

Yes, he can not make you do anything to the baby. But it is not going to go away, and he will find out, the longer you wait, most likely the mader he will be.

Also since the age of consent to have sex in Ky is 16, depending on the age of the boy, he could be facing serious legal trouble, so he needs to talk to his parents about these issues.

twinsNmore · Oct 19, 2008, 07:06 PM

I am in no way an "expert" but I have to disagree with J9--just because of your age doesn't mean you are unfit to raise a child. I was pregnant at 16 and my daughter and anyone else that you ask with tell you that I did an incredible job. There are many 30 year olds who are truly unfit to raise a child. Obviously waiting till you're older would've been a smart choice but what's done is done and you will be okay.

Back to the original question--no, emancipation is not the answer. Your dad may have a temper but he should know. As someone else said, he may surprise you. You need prenatal care, love and support. You don't want to rish harming yourself or your baby by not getting care because you're afraid to tell your dad. Maybe have someone you trust (a family member?) go with you to tell your dad. Sit down and decide what exactly you want to do--raise the baby, place it for adoption etc. Decide how you can fit education into your life so that if you decide to parent you will be able to provide for your baby.
I wish you nothing but the best. If you need someone to talk to please feel free to shoot me an email.

J_9 · Oct 19, 2008, 07:09 PM

Originally Posted by twinsNmore

I am in no way an "expert" but I have to disagree with J9--just because of your age doesn't mean you are unfit to raise a child.

You can disagree all you want, but as a labor and delivery nurse I can count on one finger the number of 14, 15, and 16 year olds who are fit to raise children as they are children themselves.

twinsNmore · Oct 19, 2008, 08:15 PM

I understand, I am in the same profession. However on both hands I can count how many people who are numerically adults but have no business raising children. My son's birth parents were adults in their 20's when he was born yet they didn't have jobs, educations, any common sense or even a clue how to raise a child. They ended up abusing him and he was to be taken away. I'm just saying that yes, a person at 15, 16, 17 may be classified as a child and perhaps not the first choice to raise a child but that doesn't automatically mean that she will not be a good mother or doesn't have the capabilities to raise a child. I had my daughter quite young and because of that I chose not to do drugs or drink since I had to by diapers and spend time with her. I may have been "a child" but I did very well with her, graduated high school early, went to college and graduated and in between marrying and having 3 more children & adopting our son I started teaching OB and Pediatrics, which I did for many years. Not bad for being in my early 30's and being a child when I started. Heck, I've made mistakes--we all have--but it wasn't because I was a young parent. I'm just saying that though the situation isn't ideal (which the OP knows) it also isn't the end of the world and that not every 15 year old can be compared to the next.

Again, I wish the OP the very best. I'm sure your town has services available to help you; counseling, parenting classes, educational resources etc.