[elyle007]

I've been dating my boyfriend for almost a year now and no matter what we do I still can't get an orgasm. Not by myself and not with his help. I've never had one in my life. I've had oral sex, fingering, and intercourse and every time we start to do something it's like I can't focus almost. I've heard that its all mental but this is getting ridiculous. I've relaxed and talked him through it but still nothing seems to happen. I don't even think I'm coming close. I would just like to know what could help.

[mishelly3]

Don't worry about it, It took me awhile also for me it was a matter of relaxing and have fun. Don't put too much in to it, just take some time and think about what you like and the rest will happen.

So have fun and relax

[xia lin]

Have you ever tried watching pornography with your partner. Watching such might excite you and increase your level of sexual intimacy. Relax and try to imitate what you watch. Of course always start with the basic position. Don't forget that it is very important to do kissing petting and necking before you go on fingering and the such. Also, try to play with your clitoris as your partner do his thing it helps a lot it to increase your orgasm. I hope this helps. You can always buzz me to update me if this works. If not, we might try other technique. Have fun!

[elyle007]

Thank you so much for these replies! Does anyone know a good way to make yourself focus? Because I think that is my biggest problem. My boyfriend is soooo hot and he should be completely turning me on because I am attracted to him but I'm always finding myself getting distracted by what we're doing rather than focusing on it. As if "oh we're having sex why am i not just completely into this" as opposed to me just having a good time

[spyderglass]

The only time I can orgasm is if I'm not focusing- just not thinking about anything except the feeling. Have you tried woman on top position? Sometimes it helps when you have more control of the situation. Also, maybe you should practice by yourself some more- if you can't orgasm by yourself-you shouldn't expect to with someone else.