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HistorianChick · Oct 10, 2008, 02:01 PM

Originally Posted by AmExp

"Please don't call me anymore." and the last thing I said was, "You were never on my level anyway." It is what it is. Also, a friend of mine told me he is playing me and trying to make me want him more. Is that true?

Wow... that was really harsh. And you're right, very mean.

Don't do these verbal/text battles anymore. Be done. Don't do this to yourself or to him.

Walk away with grace... don't worry about him any longer. Don't analyze if he "still wants you"... its DONE. Leave it there.

He asked you not to call anymore. Don't. Don't text. Don't call. Don't try and find out about him. Be done with him. Really. Its not worth hurting yourself or him any more than you both already have.

liz28 · Oct 10, 2008, 02:02 PM

Breaking the nc wasn't good but you know that. It doesn't matter who he goes with even if it a someone on crack, who cares and mainly why should you.

I think by you sending him that text it shows you do. Do he want you back or he is making you jealous, who cares. I think it's best that you erase him from your life and stop texting/contacting him.

The big question is do you want him back? Take a moment and think about what it was like to be him. I hope the answer is no.

AmExp · Oct 10, 2008, 02:06 PM

I don't anymore. I feel like he is an at this moment but I could be saying this out of anger. LOVE is a crazy thing.

HistorianChick · Oct 10, 2008, 02:15 PM

Yes, I personally know that love is a crazy thing.

Love is a crazy thing when you're virtually left at the altar. Love is a crazy thing when you have to choose between the man you love and your family. Love is a crazy thing when you're watching your hero die before your eyes from cancer that is literally taking his last breath. Love is a crazy thing when you're watching a widow bury the love of her life.

Love is a crazy thing when you're looking in to the eyes of true love, watching the world slip away. Love is a crazy thing when you see an old man with Alzheimers crawl into bed with his wife who is dying of lung cancer. Love is a crazy thing when you see your Dad burst with pride at seeing his son receive an honor from the governor while watching from his wheelchair because cancer has taken his last ounce of strength. Love is a crazy thing when you watch two people re-vow to love, cherish, and protect each other.

I've experienced all of these things.

Yes, LOVE is a crazy thing. There is so much more you have yet to experience about love.

AmExp · Oct 10, 2008, 04:01 PM

WOW. You certainly put me in my place HistoriancChick. I see you have persevered through those things and here I am complaining about my little stupid situation. Thank you for taking the time to even address this foolishness. I hope you are well despite your obstacles.

Well it is OVER for sure... he called me back... not sure if it was to get one last hoorah or what but he doesn't want me texting or calling him. He claimed that if I were a "normal" person then maybe we could hang out sometimes and of course he had to add the fact that he doesn't put up with that stuff with girl friends and how I am definitely not his g/f ( love how he stated the obvious). Anyway, after this discussion my future posts will not be about him. AT ALL!

HistorianChick · Oct 10, 2008, 04:07 PM

I forgot to tell you about the blissful side of the craziness of love...

The heart stopping entrance of the man you love after not seeing him for a month...

The music swirling around just the two of you as you eat a picnic dinner in the moonlight under the stars...

The divine moment when he says, I love you and only you...

The ecstasy when you realize that you love him and only him, too...

The pitter patter of your heart when he says you are his angel...

The safety in knowing that you don't have to worry about the safety of your relationship...

The craziness of love...

You'll experience it one day. Wait for that crazy guy. :)

I wish you the best these next few weeks as you'll be missing him. Stay strong. And really, we're here.

I've experienced it all, hon. And let me tell you, love is worth waiting for. :)

If you need us (or me, for that matter) we're here (or a private message away) :D

AmExp · Oct 10, 2008, 04:11 PM

At this moment. I feel like I wasted so much time and money. This is crazy that even care about this character. He is not worth it. I wish I could just accept that he is not worth my time and MOVE ON.

Yeah, I guess one day I may experience those things again. My romantic life is looking very bleak at this moment in time.

Thank you for your advice and time. I will certainly keep your comments in mind for the future. Oh, and I will be sending you a message if I do need help! :)

HistorianChick · Oct 10, 2008, 04:17 PM

It will happen. Don't force it, just focus on getting your heart and emotions back under control. Don't look for the next guy, don't look back at the last guy... just look at each moment and live each one the best you can.

That's the only way to live.

AmExp · Oct 10, 2008, 04:21 PM

Actually it is funny, I went on a date last night and that was refreshing. I made one mistake... we had a brief discussion about my ex and he had a discussion about his. Ugh, and I mentioned him again today via text. I got to do better. You are right that I need to NOT LOOK BACK AT HIM. I certainly don't need to bring him into my new dating experiences. It is hard because I compare him to others often.

tabbarat · Oct 10, 2008, 06:36 PM

I think the guy is acting like a jerk.. sorry babe... if you read my situation, you would see I understand how you feel... but you need to know that he also still loves you and ACTS like it... not replying messages and saying "chill" are not good signs... move on, and come to dubai and party with me! :)

By the way... ur inbox is too full, can't send messages

AmExp · Oct 10, 2008, 06:46 PM

I need something for sure. This is just not working for me. I moved back to this city in hopes that my romantic life would pickup where it left off ( and to finish my last semester). I love this city but I am not having as much fun as I thought. Sigh...

AskJenny · Oct 10, 2008, 06:48 PM

Read all the posts and most here are correct that he's just not that into you. It's not rejection so don't take it that way; it's just that you two aren't meant for each other... you can find someone much better anyway that will treat you as a lady should be treated. Wait for it... it'll be there when you least expect it... and don't take his call in 2 weeks when he's lonely or you're lonely and he wants a booty call... be done with him for good or your just cycle this thing all over again.

AskJenny · Oct 10, 2008, 07:16 PM

Good! So call your friends and hang out with them, turn off that radio if those love songs make you cry, listen to talk radio for a few weeks;... course that'll make you cry too.. jk.
Don't date for awhile either; just be you, learn who you are... make a list of what you'd like in a guy: funny, smart, caring, employed, etc. and make a list of that which you won't tolerate: abusive, alcoholic, not employed, not reliable, etc...
I'd say give yourself a grieving day but you've already been there w/that... a few times.
Your in your last semester I see; bury yourself in school and maintain a low profile for awhile; read, watch TV, go out w/friends but alcohol will bring on the drunk dialing thing; don't do that... seriously don't do that; give your cell to your friends so you're not tempted. I'm not going to say he may come back to you because YOU should not want him... you're smart, pretty, and soon to be a graduate so just move on down the road to a better person and place.

friend4u178 · Oct 10, 2008, 07:22 PM

AmExp
Jenny has given you some good advise there , now it's up to you to do it for yourself and stop being stuck in this rut.

Start going down the NC Highway

AmExp · Oct 10, 2008, 08:44 PM

I would have to agree with you as well. I do need to do that for sure. Thanks guys. :)

AmExp · Oct 12, 2008, 09:39 PM

UPDATE!!

He called me Saturday asking, "If I was gong to behave better?"... I couldn't shake it and we talked and I apologized. We ended up spending the whole weekend together and for the most part had a good time. Was this bad? I know you all told me to move on but I was SHOCKED when I saw his number on my cell phone ID. HELP!

imzz46 · Oct 13, 2008, 02:53 AM

You should never let anyone make you feel worthless and don't allow any garbage!. you should never feel like you should apologise for every time you reveal your true feelings. The best thing for you is to move on and to find someone who wants to be with you and who will treat you with the respect and attention you deserve.

liz28 · Oct 13, 2008, 06:49 AM

It seems like when you take a step forward you then take two steps backwards. Given the history with this guy deep down did you think it was the right thing? What happens the next time you call and he don't answer or you see him with another girl?

I think you should move on and don't look back. If he calls don't answer your not obligate too. Close this chapter of your life and add a new one.

HistorianChick · Oct 13, 2008, 06:57 AM

Oh hon... I thought you were committed to moving on! That you were done with him, that he was out of your life for good, and that you were moving on!

Don't let him be your drug. The best way to quit is cold turkey, no looking back... the withdrawals suck, but everyone has to go through them.

Hopefully, you didn't set yourself up for another painful withdrawal...

talaniman · Oct 13, 2008, 07:14 AM

"If I was gong to behave better?"...

You are on your way to being a well trained puppy, and a willing slave to your master, who you put above yourself.

A healthy well adjusted person would have been mad, not happy, and wagging their tail.

If that's what you want, I'm glad you got it, but you could have saved all the drama, and BS, by kissing his butt in the first place, since that's all he wanted.