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    eugene21's Avatar
    eugene21 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Oct 7, 2008, 06:38 AM
    Is this indifference?
    Hi everyone...

    I have a question to ask. Long story short. Been broken up with girlfriend of 2 years for 9 months now. We have had little contact over the period. Recently med up with her to exchange the rest of our things. She was blount with me saying she feels nothing anymore but cares for me not in a romantic way. Her feelings were not a issue months ago but over the last few months she says she feels nothing and I need to move on from her because she has moved on.

    She said she wants to be friends and stay in my life but first things need to heal and more time needs to go by before we can be friends. She said the wound is still not healed and I am not sure if she meant me or her but I am still in love with her and would like to work things out. Anyway the worse part of it we were ingaged and when we met up she asked to see the ring and I had it with me at the time. She ended up taking the ring back saying she does not want me to give it to anyone else or sell it. I told her she can not keep it but she can hold on to it until I decide what I am going to do with it. She agreed and said "down the line" we can meet up in deal with it.

    So not only am I confused with why she wants the ring because she can not wear it or sell it... Second I feel from chasing her all this time made her believe I am always going to be here so she can walk all over me and so what she wants. I thinks she feels indefference for me and I know I am to blame. My question is what can I do about it? Does love resurface? I just want to stay away from her for awhile and leave her alone for her to miss me and for that to happen I need to really move on from her. The thing that bothers me the most is I don't want to wait months to see her again like she wants to deal with the ring. I made a mistake giving it to her I was caught in the moment I want it back now to move on but she said she can't now she is very busy with work and the holdidays are here. Help please!!
    Guidostern's Avatar
    Guidostern Posts: 247, Reputation: 17
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    #2

    Oct 7, 2008, 07:02 AM

    It sounds like to me this girl doesn't know what she wants... or there could be some type of emotional connection that she has with that ring, which makes her want to keep it... or she could just be mean, sell it, and keep the money to herself.

    As far as what you can do about it, you can cut contact with her, you can ask for the ring back, which you already know the answer to; or you can just simply remain in this state that you're in and let her run over you.

    Does love resurface? I'll tell you a story that a good friend told me (short version). There was this guy and this girl, they were together for 4 years. The girl decided to break things off, thinking that it was best. They lost contact and went on with their lives. One day the guy decided to give her a call... it was about 6 years later. They began talking again, and eventually things began to come back... 2 years later, my friend was born and they have been together ever since...

    So yeah, love can resurface... but the problem is, that she has to want it to... You can't make a heart love somebody...
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Oct 7, 2008, 07:13 AM

    Wow guy why would you give a female an engagement ring and let her 'HOLD it"??

    She was very honest and upfront with you, so get your ring back now, and disappear from her life. Not smart .
    Worried Auntie's Avatar
    Worried Auntie Posts: 28, Reputation: 3
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    #4

    Oct 7, 2008, 07:30 AM

    Wow, if she is avoiding you now saying that she is busy with work and all you want is to get the ring back, most likely she sold it. I'm not sure what type of girl she is but if she really was 'over' you like you said she wouldn't have asked for the ring unless she already had plans for it.
    You should really work on moving on. There are SO many other people in this world just waiting for someone to love them.
    Not to defend her but what are you going to do with the ring? Give it to someone else? If I was the 'next' girl I'd be really mad if I found that I got a ring that was already promised to someone else. Not to say that's what you would do with it but I think you should just chalk it up as a loss and move on with your life. You never know what is around the corner. Get out go to the park, go to the bar, go to the gym, spend time with your friends... your true love will come but you can not stay and pine over her it will only make you sick and depressed.
    eugene21's Avatar
    eugene21 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Oct 7, 2008, 08:57 AM
    Thanks guys...

    She is not going to sell it, I am sure of that we have a agreement. She wants to wait until the new because she is busy and the holidays in which I think is a excuse meaning she wants the ring for as long as she can keep it. I want it back it cost a lot of money and she does not deserve it she broke the enagement off. For someone that wants to move on and for me to move on because its over does not do this. She is walking all over me and knows I want her so she can take her time and if she does not find someone she has me waiting for her... well not anymore b-tch I want the ring and I think in a few days I am going to put my foot down.

    Thank you everyone

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