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    footballplayer's Avatar
    footballplayer Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Oct 6, 2008, 05:12 PM
    How to handle this break
    I have been dating girl for a year and a half now. Things have been going great. I am in college now and she is still in high school but only has a year left. We have talked about her joining me in college the following year. However, this past weekend was her homecoming and dance and I was not able to make it back because I had a football game. I knew she was going to dance with other guys. I was slightly upset about it but got over it because I knew there was nothing I could do about it. That night after the dance she text'd me and told me she had a great time dancing with a bunch of different people. After a few minutes of her talking about the dance she came out and told me she wanted to go on a break. She said that there are times she thinks she loves me and could never leave me, but there are also times where she wishes she could enjoy being single like at the dance. The worst part is we had just gone threw a two week break three weeks ago for her to make sure being with me is what she wants. I love her very much and don't think I could ever be without her.

    How should I handle this?
    NItEMArE129's Avatar
    NItEMArE129 Posts: 222, Reputation: 29
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    #2

    Oct 6, 2008, 06:38 PM

    If your not comfortable with her dancing with other guys, say so. She won't know it bothers you if you don't tell her. It's possible that she's only doing/suggesting this break because she thinks it won't hurt you. Let her know that it does, and maybe her opinions will change.

    On the other hand, she could be totally aware of how much this bothers you and, simply, maybe she just doesn't care about you enough. You say you've been going out for a year and a half which leads me to believe that this isn't the first time this happened. So if this is the case, is it worth more to be in a relationship with a girl who your not sure even likes you a lot, or would you rather be spending your time finding one who does? Breaks are nice every now and then, but not when they're specifically meant for you to date someone else.
    JBeaucaire's Avatar
    JBeaucaire Posts: 5,426, Reputation: 997
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    #3

    Oct 6, 2008, 08:49 PM

    You're already without her. She just wants the official separation to go with the physical one. Her request is completely reasonable and fair, and you know it.

    Feel free to wait for her and hope she comes to you in a couple of years, but don't be surprised if she actually follows the path of her life... the same as you should be.

    Relationships end. Buck it up, friend. You have PLENTY to do in college to keep you busy anyway... but who knows, you're life may take on some surprising new directions.

    Simply - you can't keep someone who wants out. Ever. Period. I'm sorry this may hurt, but you knew it was a possibility, it's already happened once before... stop the repetition. Move forward this time.
    help4mommy2b's Avatar
    help4mommy2b Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Oct 6, 2008, 09:06 PM

    Your in college... have fun. As soon as you start to she is going to miss you. The more needy you r towards her the more she know you will always be there- how would she feel if you told her you wanted a break. Its going to hurt at first- its going to hurt a lot but it will get better. Take your own break. Concentrate on football and your new life in college.
    help4mommy2b's Avatar
    help4mommy2b Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Oct 6, 2008, 09:11 PM
    Oh I forgot to say... EVERYONE wants what they can't have. She knows she has you no matter what she does! And its not fair to you. As soon as you don't want her anymore she will want you. Trust me on this. Withevry guy I have cried over and called and begged for, well when I stopped they started calling and begging for me. Don't be so there for her and she should start repecting you again. If you love someone set them free. If they love you they will come back to you. Please don't waste your college days being sad. Be happy! You have a lot going for you and a bright future ahead.

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