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Expert
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Oct 6, 2008, 09:05 AM
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I just thought when I came back he would have been interested in me. Especially since I live in a great place that would intrigue him.
You wanted more, and he rejected you, the rest is your anger.
https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...at-265321.html,
Your last two posts, are what I base my opinion on.
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Full Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 09:08 AM
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Ok, what is your point?? I feel like if that was totally true then there was no reason for him to call me or hang out with me last week.
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Junior Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 09:17 AM
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 Originally Posted by AmExp
Ok, what is your point??? I feel like if that was totally true then there was no reason for him to call me or hang out with me last week.
Maybe he's just 'keeping you around' in case nothing better comes along. Or maybe he wants you there for when he's bored. Or maybe he truly does want to be your friend. Who knows. The point is that his actions are not misleading in my opinion, you are simply interpreting them wrong and creating expectations which only end up frustrating you. There is nothing substantial about the relationship and trying to quarrel with him is a way for you to try to make the relationship more significant. It simply isn't. You are torturing yourself by wasting your time even worrying about it. I'm sorry you're hurting and wish I could say something to make you feel better but the truth of the matter is that the only thing that can make you feel better is to forget about him and this whole thing.
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Full Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 09:27 AM
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You are 100% right. I am wasting my time trying to run behind someone who may or not may not want to bothered with me. That does hurt but the best thing would be to move on. I don't want to be available at someone's disposal.
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Full Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 01:34 PM
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He's not interested because you are in his space too much. Back off. Don' casually walk in to his work and make it seem like you were in the area or whatever... avoid him. Don't text him, you sound young, and inexperienced. You have to step way back, and ignore him. The more you bug a guy like this, the farther and farther away he will run. He said to you he will call you when he wants to, so listen to what he is telling you... THAT HE WANTS HIS SPACE RIGHT NOW. Respect that.
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Full Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 01:41 PM
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Yeah but why does he have to be the one that initiates the calls... he was the one that gave me the apologies and admitted to hurting me, etc.
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Junior Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 04:56 PM
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Wait who done the breaking up? You or him?
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Full Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 04:57 PM
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He did...
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Junior Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 07:00 PM
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Oh well, you gota let him be and give him space for the time being, it will make him realise what he's missing, he may or may not come back to you though, but you got more chances doing no contact then chasing him, you get what I'm saying, like the more you text call or watever it will make him go more distant, just go cold turkey on him it might change his mind.
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Full Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 07:07 PM
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Yeah, I am starting to wonder if it is really even worth it. I am tired of it all-- the chase, the frustration, and whatever else comes with winning the attention of an ex boyfriend. Luckily I didn't text him today. I DON'T WANT TO PLAY THE FOOL ANYMORE! I should have been over him a long time ago.
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Junior Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 07:30 PM
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Yea me to man I'm going through the same shi* AGAIN - NOW - TWICE IN JUST OVER A MONTH, but it involves another guy she's interested in, I seriously can't be fkd anymore with her mind games and the vicious cycle relationships in tale.
Just don't text or call him for aslong as you can until he contacts you first, it may take weeks or months but it will do you better if you just forget about him and concentrate on yourself for now. I know that's what I'm going to do, I cbf dealing with the pain and drama's.
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Full Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 07:38 PM
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Nothing against you, but I HATE when people say "you should work on yourself"... what does that mean? What if there isn't anything wrong with me in the situation? We all have room for improvement however I am tired of taking the blame every time a situation with my ex goes sour. Sure I did some silly thing, but the person who needs to be working on themselves is my ex... and of course he is not here to read this.
Btw, London is fabulous... I love Oxford Ave... ahh heaven.
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Junior Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 07:43 PM
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Na like do you own shi* for now, without him in you life, you digg
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Full Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 07:46 PM
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I did that for 7 months and I still missed him... this will not be easy for me. At all.
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Ultra Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 08:24 PM
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AmExp
We've been going on with this for months now and the reason it's still an issue is because you refuse to let it go and get on with your life without the thought of him being in it. You seem like an intelligent young lady so surely by now you can see that this guy is just stringing you along and it's because your allowing it.
Let go and get on with your life and you'll find someone who deserves you. I know you say he initiates the calls etc but then you have to ignore them plain and simple. As soon as you reply you keep yourself in this place of false hope and you never progress.
Sorry if I sound harsh but there's only one person who can do this and it's you.
Good Luck!
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Junior Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 08:28 PM
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I agree with friendy (as usual). Although, we can all tell you until we are blue in the face that you need to let go, and it's not worth your time and energy. But, you need to learn this on your own accord, on your own time. Eventually, you will realize what is going on and act accordingly. Only you will know when that is.
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Full Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 08:53 PM
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Yes, this sucks but it's true. What does someone gain from stringing a person along?
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Ultra Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 09:05 PM
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"WHat does a person gain from stringing a person along?"
Simply? They gain feathers in their cap. The knowledge that you will be there at their beckon call. The power to influence. The "fun" of knowing someone is addicted to them. The sense of "winning."
Those are the only things one gains when deliberately stringing someone on.
The best way to not be "strung on"? Cut the strings.
YouTube - Disney Pinocchio-I've Got Strings
From someone who has cut many strings... its SO worth it. :)
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Ultra Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 09:05 PM
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 Originally Posted by AmExp
Yes, this sucks but it's true. What does someone gain from stringing a person along?
They get the satisfaction of knowing they still have some sort of control over you , so don't let him. Let your actions tell him by ignoring him and keep your dignity intact.
Good luck AmExp :)
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Full Member
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Oct 6, 2008, 09:13 PM
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How would that benefit him..? I understand where you are going but that is just silly... especially seeing how he is not trying to be bothered... ugh.
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