[Sweet_Guy23]

I was in a relationship for 7 months with a girl I thought I could see myself being with for a while. We fell heavily in love with each other. Feelings I felt for her I never felt for anyone else. Everything was good. We went out a lot. We went on picnics, went to the lake, went star gazing, she even told me that I was a dream come true and that she loves that fact that she loves me. Even the first time she told she loved me she started crying. She was sending me Love Text messages. Showing me all kinds of affection. I met her family and all.

Then she went off to school which was only 35mins away... thats all!! And she started being really distant with me, not calling and textin as much, stop saying I love you, stopped all affection, but every time I asked her what was wrong she would always say that she was good and everything was fine. But I knew she was lying because her actions spoke different and because I had that intuition that things had changed.

So I finally get her to open up to me about what was wrong and she said that she wasn't as excited about me as she was early in the relationship, and I kept asking her why and all she would ever say is "I DONT KNOW" every time, IT DROVE ME NUTS!! Now we are broken up, and I don't have any closure on what really went on with her. Did she meet someone else? Did she get bored with me? Or whatever else it could have been? It would be so easy for me to move on if I had that closure but its so hard. I have been doing the NO CONTACT thing and just moving on. But I still don't understand. I gave her space and she still doesn't know how she feel or at least that is what she tells me.

WHY DO PEOPLE FALL IN LOVE SOOO HARD THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN THEY CHANGE AND DON'T KNOW HOW THEY FEEL??

[labyrinth88]

This is going to be a long response. I can completely relate to what I think your girlfriend is feeling, if I am interpreting her actions correctly. I did the same thing to my ex. I had extremely strong feelings for him. We had been close for a very long time then I went off to school (which is an hour and a half away I might add). I did not see him very often. He was always telling me he missed me and couldn't wait to see me when I came home. I felt terrible. While I was at school, I seemed to have a lot of down time to do some thinking. I realized that I wasn't attracted to him, but the fact that I had someone in my life that I could be with. I did not miss him as much as I thought I would and definitely not as much as he missed me. I started forming a mental block against him, sort of pushing myself away because I knew I didn't like him. I felt so terrible and guilty. I finally broke up with him. I decided that it was because I had just fallen out of "love" with him (a more appropriate word would be infatuation).

I'm thinking it might be the same for your girlfriend. The space and time gave her more time to really think about your relationship and maybe she decided that she really wasn't there anymore. What I mean is, the spark sort of died for her. Of course, there is always a lot of attraction and infatuation at the beginning of a relationship because there is a lot of mystery to the other person that you have yet to discover. She may have thought that she would feel like she did at the beginning throughout your entire relationship.

Sorry for the long response, but this was the only way I could relate to the situation and I thought you might want a girl's perspective on the situation. My advice to you is to give her some time so sort out her feelings. The 'I don't know' response leads me to believe that she really isn't quite sure of her feelings. If you still want to be with her, which it sounds like you do, my suggestion is to tell her that you still want to be with her but are willing to wait for her to sort out her feelings and think about it. It sounds to me like she is either unsure or just does not want to tell you what is really going on. Give her the opportunity to voice her feelings if she wants to share them. Tell her what you would like to see happen, whether that is keep the relationship or maybe take a small break. It's really up to you. Hope this helped a little.

[kaykay0941]

I can relate to what your girlfriend feels like, I went out with a boy for about 4years, but then we both went to a different school, he called me a lot but out of all his calling, I just did not want to talk to him, I wanted to make it seem like I was pushing him away, that I did not want to be with him. The more and more he called I did not answer, I wanted him to realize that I did not want to be with him anymore, we had no closure but we do not talk anymore. He use to ask me why I did not want to talk to him anymore, but I just could not tell him. My love for him died. And maybe that's how your girlfriend felt, felt like her love for you just died out and she just wanted to be no more than just friends, or maybe something happened and she just did not want to tell you. She maybe just wanted a small break from the relationship to take some time out and think about what she is doing. Maybe, maybe not. You never know. Just give her some time to think about the situation, and maybe in the future you and her could end up getting married. I hope this helped you.

[Sweet_Guy23]

Yea I hear you, but man does it hurt... her love died out??

[JBeaucaire]

Relationships start, then they change. The change can be for the better or for the worse. You only get to understand YOUR side.

It is doubtful that little happens "all of a sudden" in the death of a relationship. More than the likely her interest was waning for some time and you missed it, intentionally or not, you just missed it.

Eventually the thing came to a header and you broke up, and you're trying to think of THAT moment as the moment "it all happened all of a sudden."

Anyway, "why" is usually only a helpful question if it's aimed at yourself. Trying to grasp someone else's "why" is usually futile, probably pointless. But there are a lot of "why" questions you can ask about yourself that will be very helpful next time around.

Can you come up with any?

[Chery]

Yea I hear ya, but man does it hurt...her love died out???

Some of us take a long time to really know what love is, even if we say it often - for lack of a better way to say I'm enjoying sharing this time with you - so don't worry about the WHY of thing or the IF of what is in the past. Just go on from there and 'listen' or watch for signs from now on so that nothing happens 'all of a sudden'.

If you need help in healing, join us and vent, cry.. laugh, and heal.

Also, talk to others on this site who have or are having similar heartaches as yourself - that way, you won't hurt alone dear.

Keep in touch.

Sometimes actions speak louder than words or texts.

[TrueFaith]

Hey buddie love is used way too much in this world. Real love is kind of hard to find. Because everything in this life comes with terms. Ill love you as long as your like this. Or you make me feel this way. Etc etc

So as you can see nothing is unconditional.

But you had a great couple of months with her. Take what you feel for her and put it into someone who will really be there for you.
When I lost my first girlfriend I was so dead, I couldn't even imagen looking at another girl, but there are so many kinds of love out there some even better than the one you felt for her

I wish you all the best, there isn't much we can say to help you no one can understand what the other person is thinking or why they do what they do, the only person you need to think about now is yourself, work on your slef go to the gym take a holiday or just laze about the house for a few days
Find something to take your mind off her and keep back in with yourself.

Regards

[kaykay0941]

Yea I hear ya, but man does it hurt...her love died out???

Probably..

[lovegirl]

I was in a relationship for 7 months with a girl I thought I could see myself being with for a while. We fell heavily in love with eachother. Feelings I felt for her I never felt for anyone else. Everything was good. We went out alot. We went on picnics, went to the lake, went star gazing, she even told me that I was a dream come true and that she loves that fact that she loves me. Even the first time she told she loved me she started crying. She was sending me Love Text messages. Showing me all kinds of affection. I met her family and all.

Then she went off to school which was only 35mins away...thats all!!! And she started being really distant with me, not calling and textin as much, stop sayin I love you, stopped all affection, but everytime I asked her what was wrong she would always say that she was good and everything was fine. But I knew she was lying bc her actions spoke different and bc I had that intuition that things had changed.

So I finally get her to open up to me about what was wrong and she said that she wasn't as excited about me as she was early in the relationship, and I kept asking her why and all she would ever say is "I DONT KNOW" everytime, IT DROVE ME NUTS!!! Now we are broken up, and I dont have any closure on what really went on with her. Did she meet someone else? Did she get bored with me? Or whatever else it could have been? It would be so easy for me to move on if I had that closure but its so hard. I have been doin the NO CONTACT thing and just moving on. But I still don't understand. I gave her space and she still doesn't know how she feel or at least that is what she tells me.

WHY DO PEOPLE FALL IN LOVE SOOO HARD THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN THEY CHANGE AND DON'T KNOW HOW THEY FEEL???

Heyy wats your name?

[Sweet_Guy23]

My name is Kevin. Why do you ask?

[High Max]

Lol, read the two above posts. Wouldn't it be funny if both of them were here?

[Sweet_Guy23]

What two above posts?

[High Max]

That one girl asked for your name, sounds like she read this and thought that you were familiar..

[talaniman]

WHY DO PEOPLE FALL IN LOVE SOOO HARD THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN THEY CHANGE AND DON'T KNOW HOW THEY FEEL??

Us humans hardly ever know how we feel, nor how we will feel about almost anything. I think your emotions have you thinking everything! That's normal for humans after a break up.

[Sweet_Guy23]

If she can recognize who I am from reading my question, it has to be my ex-maybe??

[wikedjuggalo]

If she can recognize who I am from reading my question, it has to be my ex-maybe???

Do not go assuming, as assuming stuff will literally drive you crazy. But you want to open yourself to answer their question then go ahead but be prepared for both the good and bad by admitting your identity. As both good and bad could come of it.

[411Help]

With lack of communication, anything can happen.

[Sweet_Guy23]

Well I answered her question. I gave my name. Its Kevin. I hope this doesn't turn into anything negative. Im just trying to vent my emotions out which is making it easier on me to get over this situation. You know??

[wikedjuggalo]

Well I answered her question. I gave my name. I hope this doesn't turn into anything negative. Im just trying to vent my emotions out which is making it easier on me to get over this situation. You know???

By all means vent here as we all do and I still am. I will say being able to talk to people who have been there has helped a lot.

[Sweet_Guy23]

Yea appreciate it. All of you!! I never joined a community like this before. But you are right. I just hope that if that was her that this won't turn into anything bad.