[sexierboy]

Me and my ex girlfriend where together a week less than a year. We have now been separated for a year up until recently when she started making contact again. I have found myself being friends with benefits with her. But there was always this glow in her eyes as I have never seen before when she kisses me. What must I do because I really want her back. But her family hates me and she told them she hates me but she still runs away from home to be with me

[ChihuahuaMomma]

Ask her what her intentions are. And stop confusing the relationship with "benefits".

[sexierboy]

I already asked her what her intentions are then she told me that she wasn't sure how she felt about me. And I simply just went my way and went out to go meat some girls but when I told her about it she looked sad. Can you help me figure out why she got sad at the fact that I had moved on

[ChihuahuaMomma]

Because she is upset about losing the "benefits" of your relationship. If she isn't ready to invest in your emotionally again, don't let her invest physically.

[sexierboy]

You know. I feel as if she is playing games with me. Because as I said her family hates me. And after I told her about my previous dates. They actually banned me from seeing her again. Not that I care that much but it does affect me and this girls is special to me. I don't have a clue what she is thinking. She also now told me that its for the best we don't see each uda. And I'm having a ball. I neva knew there were so much ladies out there that was interested in me. But like I said. I'd love to give this up to be her man again :confused:

[ChihuahuaMomma]

It honestly sounds to me that she is playing games. I would suggest that you stop communicating with her and move and take advantage of those other ladies that are interested.

[sexierboy]

I don't want to break contact with her because this is the girl I want to spend the rest of my life with. I am taking advantage of my situation but I'm afraid its pushing her away. Because she is very unhappy with the act that I am spreading my wings. And I told her there are a lot of guys that wuld love to date her but she insists that I am the only gu y4 her which is cool. She is the only girl for me to. But she can't seem 2 stand up to her family and tell them how she feels. But until then. Do you think I should continue dating other girls even if this hurts her so much
That is my ex

[happy_jester]

I'm having a ball. i neva knew there were so much ladies out there that was interested in me. I'd love to give this up to be her man again

To be honest,I'm rather confused. One minute you're saying that you're " having a ball"
Without her,the next you say,that,you'd "love to give this up to be her man again" :confused:

I am taking advantage of my situation but I'm afraid its pushing her away.

Yes,by your behaviour that's exactly what you've done! You'll now need to accept that.

But she can't seem 2 stand up to her family and tell them how she feels.

It's NOT about that!! Her family don't want you to see her,either. Now,what you
must do is have NO CONTACT

[talaniman]

I really don't think you can honestly think of a future together, just for the simple fact, that besides the sex, you have nothing.

No communications, and no willingness to work together, but there is time to hump, and jump on each other, which keeps those intense feelings alive.

Haven't you figured out by now that stopping the physical, and see what your like in other ways, will give you a perspective based in reality, and not just those intense feelings that you both assume means love. They don't.

Just on the basis of that, you should leave her alone.

[liz28]

Your both might be playing games with each other. Sounds like your want to be together but no one is ready to step forward. She won't because of her family, you do but is waiting on her. Maybe you should have kept no contact with each other. This paths will only lead to someone or both getting hurt. If you still want her in your life and she isn't ready to be in your life that means it is time to move on because it is unfair for you to meeting girls while still having feeling and relations with this girl. It is time for someone to put pump the breaks on this. You always know her intentions. You will continue to meet girls while she gets jealous and your feelings for her would only increase while new girl get hurt too or what happens if she starts to meet other guys and then you will get jealous. Its too much. Don' leave the choice up to her and don't sit around and wait.

[sexierboy]

Ok I hear what you all saying. But you all telling me stuff that I already know. My thing is that I don't want to hurt her. If I leave her then she will be hurt. And so will I. I have spent ova a year crying ova her. And now that she is finally here, its hard to let go even though the situation seems impossible for us to have a relationship. She once suggested we get married but I knew it won't solve our problem. I want to be with her. And she wants to be with me. Its her family that's standing in our way. I really need 2 figure out how 2 win their trust back.

[liz28]

How old are you and her? Does she live with her family? If your both want to be with each other and her family is blocking this, then maybe she needs to stand up to them. My family sometimes didn't like who I was involved with but I let them know it my life and I decides who I be with and they should respect my decision. As long as the person I am with is not abusing me, cheating, on drugs or sells it, or involve in anything illegal what's is the problem? Why do her family hate you?

[talaniman]

I

want to be with her. And she wants to be with me. Its her family that's standing in our way. I really need 2 figure out how 2 win their trust back.

The family has nothing to do with it. It's the actions of you both, that counts, and lets face it, she hasn't made a move to make this work, other than the sex. That my friend speaks volumes, as your not worth her going against her own family. You had better start paying closer attention to her actions.

Your letting her use sex, to lead you around so she gets what she wants. Examine yourself, without her physical pressure on you.

[sexierboy]

She is 18 and I am 19. The thing is that I did abuse her. Not physically,but mentally, I am a new born christian nw and she knows what that means but her family doesn't believe that people cn turn their life around.

Your letting her use sex, to lead you around so she gets what she wants.

. That's not true because we haven't had sex. And we neva planned to. But still I need help. Things are getting worse everyday.:(

[talaniman]

things are getting worse everyday.:(

Explain? This is getting confusing as if there is no sex only talking, why haven't you resolved things with her?? That's where it starts. If she isn't on the same page, or doesn't want what you want, what is it you expect from her?? This will never work without communications to begin with. If you two can't do that..?

[sexierboy]

We ha d a talk today and she told me that she had told them how she felt. Now they want to speak to me about something. I think I will go and see what its all about. But there was sex 2 years ago. Not at the moment. The thing that is confusing me about that situation is that she cried while telling me all she told me today. But anyway, I think I will take a stand and listen to them and wats going to happen because now I feel like I am a lucky guy 2 have so many lady friends chasing me. But I will always have place for her and chose her above an other girl. It seems that no matter what happens today. I will let her go and see if I meet her agen in the future

[talaniman]

Doesn't sound like your especially committed to her, and maybe being clear about what you mean, would dispel any assumption she may have. The same with the family, as no telling what they have been told. This is something you should have taken care of long ago, and maybe saved a lot of confusion, and hard feelings.