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    DonaldM_23's Avatar
    DonaldM_23 Posts: 86, Reputation: 10
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    #1

    Sep 5, 2008, 12:18 PM
    My Child mother violated the visiation order
    To make a long story short, I have joint custody of my two kids. In addition to the custody I also filed for visitation. The visitation order state that every other weekend my children will be in my care. Also during the summer season my kids will be with me for a whole month. My question is, since the month expired the kids mom state she is over sea (Haitia) and there is no flights leaving haiti for 12 days which will make me have the kids for 2 additional weeks. Has she violated the order and should I file for a petition for enforcement of order of custody. Just to let every one know this has happen before.
    08_777444's Avatar
    08_777444 Posts: 111, Reputation: 16
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    #2

    Sep 9, 2008, 11:21 AM
    File a petition with the court…for what? What are you going to tell them, that you get to see your kids too much? Even if you file your petition, pay the $20 dollar petition fee, you most likely wouldn't get a hearing for several weeks, and by then it's too late. It sounds like you are wanting the courts to force mom to come home NOW, which isn't going to happen.

    In most cases the dad's don't get enough time with the kids or get denied visitation. So personally I find it odd that you would ask such a question. The courts would expect a petition from you if you WEREN'T getting to see your kids... not if you are getting to see them too much. That is almost backwards logic. I don't have any children of my own but it sounds strange that you wouldn't jump at the chance to spend more time with your kids.

    If I were you, I would think less about the courts order of visitation and just be happy and enjoy the time that you are able to spend with your kids. Besides, the courts won't do anything about it anyhow, and exactly what type of punishment were you looking for them to dish out to mom? If you pay child support and that is what you are worried about, you can always file for a retroactive abatement. If you are worried that mom doesn't care enough, file for full custody.
    DonaldM_23's Avatar
    DonaldM_23 Posts: 86, Reputation: 10
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    #3

    Sep 9, 2008, 12:12 PM
    Maybe I need to give you more details... the reason I ask because I live 1 hours away from my children. Yes I love spending time with my children but if there schooling is centered around their mother home it puts me at a huge inconvience. I have to travel in the morning traffic 1 hour and a half to bring them to school. From there 1hr to work and repeat it once I get off from work... I would'nt mind if it was 20 min away but I'm 1hr with out traffic away. Just to give you some more insite, my kids school is across the street from their mother house. Also she still oversea and was told she doesn't know when she is coming back. I'm paying child support and child care during this period, If the courts favor females most of the time. Than the court should consider my petition because I don't live across the street.
    08_777444's Avatar
    08_777444 Posts: 111, Reputation: 16
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    #4

    Sep 9, 2008, 12:53 PM
    Now that you have given a little more of the story it is clear that the problem lies with the commute.

    There is an easy solution; get the kids enrolled in your school district also. If you know this is the way mom is, you should have expected something like this. If mom pulls anything like this again in the future, you won't have to worry about the commute. Their education is the most important thing. I don't think any kid likes being jumbled from one school to the next, but obviously you have a problem with the current arrangement, and that is the most simple solution… in my opinion.

    You are absolutely 100% correct when you say that the courts favor the mother. If she continues taking off, I would consider retaining an attorney.
    DonaldM_23's Avatar
    DonaldM_23 Posts: 86, Reputation: 10
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    #5

    Sep 9, 2008, 01:53 PM
    Thank a million for you opinion... The only issue with changing schools is that I would also have to file for full custody. My Kids are the love of my life but when two adults decided to have a child there is a higher level of responsiblility. But when one parent decide to leave the country and leaves the other parent in a bad situation why should'nt I seek the courts help so that this would'nt happen again. I truly hate going to court, trust me I do but the one that loses are the kids. I'm a firm believer in giving my kids what they want and providing a healthy environment but some people have to remember being a parent is a joint effort, without one in some cases an element is lost...
    450donn's Avatar
    450donn Posts: 1,821, Reputation: 239
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    #6

    Sep 9, 2008, 02:17 PM
    I think a more pressing issue is did she have permission to take the kids out of the country?
    And, yes I would be upset if my X took my kids for longer than planned without talking to me and getting my OK first. At the very least she should be willing to make it up to you by letting you have them for an additional amount of time that you two can agree on.
    DonaldM_23's Avatar
    DonaldM_23 Posts: 86, Reputation: 10
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    #7

    Sep 9, 2008, 02:20 PM
    I think you read the original question wrong... Please read again @450
    08_777444's Avatar
    08_777444 Posts: 111, Reputation: 16
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    #8

    Sep 9, 2008, 02:53 PM
    How often does she take off like this I guess is the real question? You originally posted asking nothing about the children and school. You only asked if she was in violation and should you go through the court. I responded after having only half the story -- my fault -- you did say that you were going to make a long story short.

    I must emphasize that I never said the kids should change schools. I said you should enroll them in your district also. They are allowed to be enrolled in two districts at once… without changing custody. Find out what school they would be going to if you had full custody, and sign them up! They would go to mom's school -- when mom is in the country, but from what you say that's not often. So, in the case that this a pattern for her, then you can take them to the school by your house. As I said, the kids probably won't like it.

    Don't let me discourage you from filing the petition if you feel that is what you must do. I am all for equal rights. As for filing for full custody, if mom is as bad as you say she is, what are you waiting for?
    DonaldM_23's Avatar
    DonaldM_23 Posts: 86, Reputation: 10
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    #9

    Sep 9, 2008, 04:27 PM
    She is not a bad mom, its just the disappering act from time to time. I live too far and work too hard for unconvience. Time will tell thanks a million

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