[secretgyrl16]

Okay, I’ve been with my husband for three years but we have been married for a year in a half. Our relationship before we got married was great. I mean we had our issues because he cheated and did wrong, and I’m not so innocent myself but we went pass that. Also, his family didn’t want him to marry me but we went pass that issue as well. So we got married but I had an unplanned pregnancy just three months into our marriage. I don’t believe in having abortions so we decided to keep it. We were happy about the situation and things were going great. Until the baby was born and we moved into our apartment. He feels that the baby is an interference with our marriage. Well I don’t blame him in a way because newborns do take up “our time” but I accept it because I am a mother now. Also, my husband wants sex 24/7. He thinks it’s not fair that I don’t give it to him every day. But I don’t think it’s fair that he only loves me and shows affection when he wants to do it. He is only nice and romantic to me when he wants some, and he doesn’t even try to turn me on. Basically he thought he was ready to get married but now that he is, he doesn’t like it. We have been trying every day but it just seems to get worse and worse. I was ready to settle down but he isn’t. He doesn’t know how to be a husband or be a boyfriend because I was his one and only. He never had a relationship before me but I did. He is very immature and selfish. He doesn’t respect me either and doesn’t care for me at all. I love him with al my heart and I can’t live without. But it’s getting to a point where I don’t see him the same anymore. I'm starting to teach myself to forget him because I can’t keep hurting and crying. Then, he takes the anger out on the baby and I don’t think that’s right. Well, I could write pages on this situation so I am going to leave it as is. Should I keep trying?? Is there still hope? Should I just give up?


I know he doesn't have experience and to have patience, but I am not happy anymore. He doesn't spend time with me or love me anymore. Now he is starting to look at other girls and doesn't try to make it work? I'm just so depressed :( :confused:

[ylaira]

His jealousy to the baby and voracious sexual appetite lies deep problem that aren't communicated well. The marriage is just so new so give a little chance.

Just take a break for now. Get a place on your own. Get into counseling.

[sunshine64]

RUN! My first husband was the same way. I was very young when I married and it took me a few years to find my voice and stand up for myself. Once I did and started asserting my opinions he didn't like it and started by looking at others and then progressed to affairs. He didn't want a wife, he wanted a perpetual girlfriend who was there to do nothing but tend to his needs and have a good time. Well he needs to grow up and it doesn't sound like he is going to. If he is taking it out on the baby, I'm not sure what that means. If he's yelling at the baby that's not good, if he's turning away from the baby that's not good either. Either way, take yourself and your child out of the situation. Give yourself some space and distance from his needs to give yourself some clarity. Get a good job, stand on your own and put your child first. You chose this man, your child didn't. Don't leave your child in a bad situation. I grew up in a bad situation and resented my mother for never being strong enough to leave so we wouldn't have to endure own fathers bull. I made sure I didn't repeat. I left my husband for my daughter. Oh sure after I left he came around being loving and acting like we were dating but that ends soon and then back to the same old. If its not working now its not going to improve. Lesson learned, move on for yourself and your child.