[misstee1]

I am a divorced mum of four and gran of two and am desperate for advice as my heart is breaking!

Can someone please advise me what my rights are concerning my granchildren? I have a grandaughter to my eldest daughter and a grandson to another daughter; both have turned against myself, my partner, my two other children who still live at home and my parents. I believe that my ex husband has had a lot to do with this as up until he started a new relationship a couple of months ago was punishing me for meeting someone else over a year after we separated!

Even after he lied and said that he was dying of lung cancer, I still encouraged our children not to turn against him as he was their father and needed them however he has used every opportunity to turn our children against myself and my partner whenever I have had words with any of my children as normal families do!

After finding out that my two daughters have said some extremely hurtful things (many of which are untrue) I feel that at this moment I do not want to see them, however my granchildren are innocent and I miss them terribly, even though I don't see them every day or even every week does not in any way mean I don't think about them constantly and love them with every breath in my body!!

I really look forward to receiving some help and advice please.

Misstee1

[ScottGem]

Well, since you don't indicate where you are we can't answer. While some US states have enacted grandparent rights laws, not all acknowledge such rights.

But if you do have rights, you will need to go to court to enforce them. And that will do nothing to change the animosity. My suggestion is to try and get a third party (clergyman?) to intercede and help you restore your relationship with your children and then your grandkids.

[misstee1]

I am sorry I didn't realise when I signed up for this site that it was based in America, I am in England so our laws will probably be different to yours! As for the suggestion of using a third party to help restore my relationship with my daughters, well to be honest this is not really an option as I mentioned in my first post, at this moment in time I do not want to have a relationship with my daughters due to the way they have treated me over the last year to say the least ( its been going on for over 6 years with my eldest daughter). There are so many things that I could mention but it would take far too long. The way my daughters have treated me is as though they have no love or respect for me, both have said on numerous occasions that they wish me dead and at the moment I feel unable to forgive this! You may feel that I am wrong to say that and had I not been in this situation myself I would have advised anyone that you cannot feel anomosity towards your own child. I have never ever stopped loving them and would lay down and die for them but I am extremely hurt by their actions and words and although I have told them that no matter what I will always love them, I have also told them that I do not like the person that they have become!

I really hope I have not offended anyone with my comments but you would have to be in my position to understand how I am feeling.

Misstee1

[ScottGem]

If you Google Grandparents Rights UK, there are a number of support groups you can contact. But according to what I read, grandparents have no legal rights in the UK.

No one was offended. We understand your angst.

P.S. While the membership here is primarily US, we have members worldwide. That's why its important to indicate your general area so we can find info pertaining to you.