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amy321 · Aug 5, 2008, 05:25 PM

Ya I know that not to be mean I just say about sleeping with him because I kind of know she is have his bady now. I am going to care about her and show her I care. I think if I need to I think I need to take time off work to spend with my kids and get out. I think there father need to be here and help out. We are not a couple no more but we been working on that and it is kind of getting better.

ChihuahuaMomma · Aug 5, 2008, 05:26 PM

So, now you are saying that you KNOW that she is pregnant?

amy321 · Aug 5, 2008, 05:30 PM

Yes because I talk to her. After I talk to you guys that I don't know she walk in and I said we need to talk and she said OK. Then she start talking. Now I know what I need to do I need to take control of this all.

liz28 · Aug 5, 2008, 05:30 PM

How old is the boyfriend?

amy321 · Aug 5, 2008, 05:33 PM

The boy is 19 and she said he was 18.

liz28 · Aug 5, 2008, 06:17 PM

I could be wrong but from reading some of your other posts you don't seem like an adult with 3 teenagers. Are you using someone else user name? Just curious but I could be wrong but some things you wrote in your other posts seems like it was written by someone young.

amy321 · Aug 5, 2008, 06:20 PM

Yes my friend used it because she wanted to see what others would do and then she like it so she got one too. I have not really used it that much but she has and sorry for that. Yes I am a mother with 3 teenagers and a boyfriend or whatever you want to call him. We just been having our ups and downs.

ChihuahuaMomma · Aug 5, 2008, 09:06 PM

Originally Posted by amy321

yes my friend used it because she wanted to see what others would do and then she like it so she got one too. I have not really used it that much but she has and sorry for that. Yes I am a mother with 3 teenagers and a boyfriend or whatever you want to call him. We just been having our ups and downs.

You really shouldn't let other people use your username. They can easily get their own.

amy321 · Aug 6, 2008, 05:53 AM

Well I did not know. That was like a one time thing. What do you want me to do about that

liz28 · Aug 6, 2008, 09:41 AM

You can get your own user name.

amy321 · Aug 6, 2008, 12:09 PM

Yes I know that

ChihuahuaMomma · Aug 6, 2008, 12:23 PM

Please do not use the same screen name that someone else is using, it confuses everyone here. Sometimes we look back at other post's by that person to get additional information that might not have been divulged in this particular post. So I would highly suggest you getting your own screen name. I'm not sure, but it might be against the rules to share screen names.

So, on the other hand; your daughter IS pregnant. Support her. Take her to her doctor's appointments. Give her advice from a mother's perspectve. But do NOT be this new baby's mother. Make her take responsibility for her actions. Make her stay in school... When she is done with school, make her fill out college apps, and work through the summer. She is acting like an adult, she needs to know how to behave like one, and have responsibilities like one as well.

As far as the other kids, don't think that you are done parenting. Make sure that the other children know that this behavior is not acceptable. Make sure that they know THIS is the consequence for their actions(sex)...

Alty · Aug 6, 2008, 12:46 PM

There are other options for your daughter, abortion and adoption are other options other than the obvious raising the child on her own.

Is there a planned parenthood in your area? Do you have a family doctor that can help.

If abortion is an option for your daughter than this needs to be done asap.

Good luck.

ChihuahuaMomma · Aug 6, 2008, 12:49 PM

First step is to take her to a doctor, and find out how far along she is. Abortions should only be done to a certain point.

If Adoption is an option, You need to start searching for acceptable parents to adopt the child to.

If they are keeping the child, then both of these children need to be taking parenting classes.

amy321 · Aug 6, 2008, 01:22 PM

This is my same screen but someone used it and I should have never let them use it sorry about that. They are keeping the baby and I am going to talk to them about what they are going to have to do and what they need to take to be ready for this.

Chery · Aug 7, 2008, 10:43 AM

To the real amy321... please get your 'friend' to register as a new member as soon as possible.
This seems to me like a pattern of her entire life. It's obvious to me that she used being a working single mother as an excuse to let things slide as far as her responsibility as a parent are concerned. Then, slowly, she indicated that there is a father in the picture... where was he?? She stated that they are working on it... apparently only the physical and partnership part, but certainly not the 'parent' part. So, she's hiding behind one excuse after another, even hiding behind another person's username, instead of taking on the responsibility for herself and facing up to life and start to make some MAJOR corrections.

This is JUST MY OPINION, and not the site's, but I feel that the kids should be taken from her and given a chance to see what real family life is like. Her daughter needs to have guidance from someone more responsible than her - even if it is a shelter for unwed mothers - at least she'll learn a lot more than she ever did at home.

When you have a child, your are either a parent right from the get-go, or you are not, and she has not been one for a long time. If she thinks that feeding and clothing and providing a place to sleep now and then (when not sleeping around somewhere else) is enough to be a parent, she has failed - and this is not something one can change overnight. At their age, it's too late anyway, they already have a picture of her standards - and it's time for them to get a different view of life than what she has offered so far.

To amy321's 'friend'... wake up, see a therapist, and stop hiding from real life. You need to help yourself before you can even begin to try to 'help' your kids now.

Sorry about this, but they deserve something better in life, if it's not too late, and you need help. Maybe you did not get the guidance and nurturing as a child yourself, but that's another subject and you should not deny your kids a chance to see things from another perspective.

amy321 · Aug 10, 2008, 12:42 PM

This is the really amy that is having the kids trouble.

AsClOsEaSiTgEtS · Aug 11, 2008, 01:15 PM

I'm a teen and if I was pregnant I would try and hide it.;)
Look for these signs:
1.Diffrance in acts and behavior/guilt
2.sneaky
3.less talkative torwards you
4.wont look at you when she's talking anymore

If you don't see any of that or if you do... just confront her about it? Mabey she's to scared to tell you and comfronting her mite make it easier... trust me I know... my sister did the same thing.:(

liz28 · Aug 11, 2008, 01:29 PM

Her daughter already told her she was pregnant. To the op there is many programs that help teens. They even have mother and daughter school. She be eligible for teen cap if she don't have health insurance and after the child is born their both will be covered and as always their wic and parenting class. Your should start looking into these programs asap.

biotchgiggles · Aug 18, 2008, 12:27 AM

Best thing to do is sit down and have an open conversation and not a harsh one either. You were pregnant once let her know you know what she is going through and want to help her. If she denies anything keep her confidence up and let her know you will be there for her when she is ready to talk. Support is always the best thing for this type of situation. I can also recommend a web site www.cafemoms.com it is a great site for all moms.