[ISneezeFunny]

I'm not doing too hot alty. Having a rough day.

... so I'm lashing out on AMHD-ers. It's OK. They had it coming.. . a 12 year old just asked what she should do on a date... at the movies... with a 16 year old.

... I'm not having kids. Nope.

[Alty]

Aw, Sneezy, tell Auntie Alty all about it. Do you need a hug?

As for having kids, don't judge all by a few. Kids are a product of their environment, so naturally yours would be great. Never say never, because you never know. :)

Now, what's wrong sweets?

[ISneezeFunny]

Eh, I'm just whining. Feel like being whiny today ;)

Studying's going fine. Just banging it out.

Restaurant... no word, but... it takes a couple of weeks, so no worries.

I think I'm just cranky... haven't had much sleep lately. Had trouble falling asleep... physically, I'm exhausted, but when I lay down, nothing. I used to be able to fall asleep in 30 seconds. (hc calls it "passing out" and not "falling asleep"... eh, semantics).

But lately, I lay down... say... 2am... and nothing. I've tried drinking, and it's helped a bit, but again, it's more like "passing out drunk".

Went to the doc, gave me a sample of ambien... but I'm not a huge fan of drug-induced sleep (like drinking isn't... ). I've always gotten about 3 - 5 hours of sleep a night since high school (explains my height) but that was never the problem, at least I could fall asleep whenever I wanted to. Not so much lately. If I'm lucky, 2 hours. If not... oh boy.

[Alty]

Well you're under allot of stress lately, the Mcats are almost here, you've been studying non stop, you have a restaurant deal in the works, Lily just came home, is it any wonder that you can't fall asleep?

Here's a little trick I learned long ago, it works for me, maybe it will work for you. When you lay on you bed picture your toes in your head, picture all of the energy in your feet leaving through your toes, concentrate, visualize it, then move on to your legs, waist, chest, arms, hands, head, with each one visualize the energy draining out. It helps you relax, helps you to not think about all the things going on in your life, just concentrate, see if it works. :)

[ISneezeFunny]

Forget zen meditation.

Alty's "your energy (or soul) is seeping through your body" meditation.

I'll definitely give that a try tonight :)

And how are YOU feeling? Your body feeling as sexy as your voice?

[Alty]

Let me know if it works for you. Works for me every time, I'm usually asleep before I get to my waist. :)

[ISneezeFunny]

I've actually thought this through and have realized that I've never "fallen asleep" (thanks hc... for that... instigating thought). I've always passed out.

... how the heck do you fall asleep?! I've heard people that just lay down, and "swirl into oblivion"... what the heck?

This is my idea of "sleep":

My head touches my pillow. I close my eyes. Black-out. 30 seconds... 1 minute tops.

[Alty]

Wow, I wish. I am a vivid dreamer, that's how I usually fall asleep, I think about something I enjoy and act out a little scenario in my head, usually I fall asleep within 5 minutes of that and continue dreaming about it throughout the night. Yep, love my dreams. ;)

When I have allot on my mind I can't usually hold a dream in my head, it gets pushed out by my worries, that's when I use the method I told you about. Works every time. :)

I hope CM finds a tattoo she likes, personally I love the chinese symbols and the symbolism of the cherry blossom in Japan. I am getting my second tattoo in the winter, I want three flowers, two in full bloom to represent my two kids, and one that hasn't bloomed to represent the baby I lost. I've thought about it long and hard, because it would be a constant reminder of the miscarriage, but I'm constantly reminded of it anyway, this way I have something to represent that child, something is better than nothing. I hope that doesn't sound depressing.

[ISneezeFunny]

Not depressing... more beautiful. I like it. I always wanted a tattoo... but nothing ever fancied me too much, and I figured if nothing really fancied me, then I shouldn't jump into it. Perhaps later in the future.

... I don't dream. Yes, biologically, we all dream... in that case, I never remember it. Last time I had a dream was... uh... 8th grade I think.. . 9 years ago? Yikes.

[jrebel7]

I lost a baby also Alty. It never leaves. What I try to do is celebrate the life that was on it's way to us. (I edited this so it reads better. I don't think the first part made sense the way I wrote it at first.)

I hope that doesn't sound strange. I mean, when I lost my dad and my nephew, I celebrate their life, not losing them. I try to do the same with my baby.

Maybe I shouldn't have jumped in here tonight. I am a bit melancholy also.

[ISneezeFunny]

I'm so sorry about the loss rebbie... alty too. Can't imagine (and I'm pretty sure I'll never actually comprehend the magnitude of the loss).

I think everyone should celebrate the lives of the ones they've lost. Celebrate the memories... and cherish them.

[jrebel7]

Thanks Sneezy! You are precious.

I am going to sign off here so bid each of you a wonderful night! Love and Hugs!!

[Alty]

Of course you should jump in Rebbie, you are always welcome.

It does stay with you forever though, doesn't it. It will be three years September 3 that I lost the baby. Well, to me it was a baby, I was only 3 months pregnant, but to me it's a baby as soon as I find out I'm pregnant. The baby actually died at 10 weeks, I went for an ultrasound at exactly 12 weeks only to be told that the baby was gone, go home, rest. I started hemorraghing that night, but I though nothing of it, though it was just my body miscarrying the baby. Twelve hours later after a night of passing clots the size of my fist, and no longer being able to stand on my own or remember my own name, Wiggy rushed me to the hospital. It was the scariest and most painful thing I've ever been through. The rushed me into emergency, I passed out, remember waking up to a room full of people all poking, prodding, screaming, push that, check this... at one point I asked a nurse if I was going to die, she said "I hope not". It ended with an emergency D & C, and that was it, no more baby.

Sorry, I don't know why I told that story, maybe because the 3 year anniversary is almost here.

Sorry Sneezy, don't mean to gross you out. :(

[Alty]

Sneezy, I had a beer earlier today with dinner, around 5pm, can I have another, it's 12am, and I took my last antibiotic today at 6pm. Please. :)

[ISneezeFunny]

What a novel idea. I'm having a beer, why shouldn't you?

... and gross ME out? Please lady. Just TRY to gross me out and I'll send you flowers ;)

[Alty]

You really want me to try? I bet I could gross you out. Should I try? How about tell you an embarrassing story, bet I can make you blush, yup, bet I can, should I try?

If I do it will be through email, otherwise I'd get banned for sure. ;)

[ISneezeFunny]

I'm not so sure you can, alty.

Remember... I'm the guy that worked with dead people. A 5-day floater is probably as gross as life will let things get.

[Alty]

Okay, true about the gross. I can probably make you blush though. ;):)

[Unknown008]

Hi all. I know it's pretty late there, but I don't think that I'll be able to get online when you're usually... my mom told me that I was staying for too long a time in front of the PC and using all the hours of internet, saying that AMHD was a game site. How frustrated I was! Well, I guess I can do nothing except obeying.

Alty, glad you feeling better!!
Sneezy, congrats for your 5th green square! And hope that you will have dreams soon ;)
Rebbie night and sweet dreams to you dear. And what beautiful of a cake you've got!
Starby, hope that you're doing good.
M, Batman, or spiderman hope you too are fine there, in your corner.
Stringer, what to say... hope you're well too
Chery, now you too are not feeling well? So, I wish you to get well as soon as possible.

If I forgot anybody, well, sorry but remember me next time. Ah, yes, there's starty and guy. But I haven't seen starty here. And guy was in lately. Hi Guy! Had nice days?

Hey Unky,

I'm doing a bit better, hopefully on the road to recovery. I'm still coughing all the time and it's driving me crazy, but hopefully that will end soon.

How are you?

I'm fine, but a bit angry for the problem I explained above. And don't abuse too much of that beer dear. I don't want you to have any risk of going sick again so soon, especially if these beers are icy cold. I'm not a specialist, nor up to the experience of Sneezy but I do know that we should not take in cold things. ;)

[starbuck8]

Awww... Unky! I am still awake, but was just off to bed actually. I hope you can still talk to us! I know your Mom doesn't understand that we are decent people here! We'd miss our little Unky if he was gone! So much fun to talk with! :(

I hope everything is well with you too Unky, and we well look for you whenever you get a chance to chat! :) Be good, and listen to your Mom. Hey, it's hard for people to understand if they don't know that we all repect each other here, and we all care about each other too!. even if we don't know each other face to face!

Come back when you can Unky! We will hold down the fort... (whatever fort it will be next week. haha) and we will all still be here! :D