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lover gurl · Jul 14, 2008, 05:44 PM

I apologize to all of you for my immaturity and selfishness. I am really stressed out right now and I guess this was just a way to show it. I do want a baby but I can wait. It is the right thing to do for me and for the baby's sake. I will do like some of you said and start taking some babysitting jobs. That will be a great way for me to learn more about babies. And as well I'll have the joy of being with kids like I want. I never really thought about all the downfalls to bringing a child onto earth. From reading the responses I got from all you caring, wonderful, and thoughtful people, it opened my eyes and made me think. Once again I am very sorry. Thank you all for your patience and taking your time to help and save me.

Sincerely,
Lover Girl
Amanda Coogle

N0help4u · Jul 14, 2008, 06:37 PM

Develop a better/closer relationship with your boyfriend and in time you will both know when it is the right time.

Synnen · Jul 14, 2008, 07:30 PM

Originally Posted by lover gurl

I apologize to all of you for my immaturity and selfishness. I am really stressed out right now and I guess this was just a way to show it. I do want a baby but I can wait. It is the right thing to do for me and for the baby's sake. I will do like some of you said and start taking some babysitting jobs. That will be a great way for me to learn more about babies. And as well I'll have the joy of being with kids like I want. I never really thought about all the downfalls to bringing a child onto earth. From reading the responses I got from all you caring, wonderful, and thoughtful people, it opened my eyes and made me think. Once again I am very sorry. Thank you all for your patience and taking your time to help and save me.

Sincerely,
Lover Gurl
Amanda Coogle

This made my day---thank you very much for responding!

Another thing you can do, if you find after babysitting that you really like to be around children a lot, is to look into a career that works with children. Finish high school and go on to college to become a child caregiver, or a teacher (we need so many men and women who love kids to guide children in our schools!), a child psychologist, a social worker, a foster parent---the ways that you can work with children and give them your love and your help are endless.

I sense that you have a lot of love in you to give a child--you just need to wait until you are more stable financially and emotionally yourself to have your own. And remember--ALL children need love, and while having your own child is special to YOU, giving love to children that are desperate for it is special to THEM, and can change their lives.

Alty · Jul 14, 2008, 09:38 PM

Originally Posted by lover gurl

I apologize to all of you for my immaturity and selfishness. I am really stressed out right now and I guess this was just a way to show it. I do want a baby but I can wait. It is the right thing to do for me and for the baby's sake. I will do like some of you said and start taking some babysitting jobs. That will be a great way for me to learn more about babies. And as well I'll have the joy of being with kids like I want. I never really thought about all the downfalls to bringing a child onto earth. From reading the responses I got from all you caring, wonderful, and thoughtful people, it opened my eyes and made me think. Once again I am very sorry. Thank you all for your patience and taking your time to help and save me.

Sincerely,
Lover Gurl
Amanda Coogle

And my faith in teens has been restored. This post made my day, heck, it made my week, possibly even my month. I'm so glad that you read what we said and listened.

I don't know what to say, you've left me speechless, that's not an easy thing to do. I wish you all the best in the future, and I'm very optimistic that your future will be great.

Dare I say that I'm proud of you, or does that sound too much like a Mom? :)

the3littlegirls · Jul 15, 2008, 01:12 AM

Originally Posted by lover gurl

hi. my name is amanda and i am 16 years old. i have a boyfriend that is 18 and already people have a problem with that because of our ages. well i want a baby really bad and i'm thinking of getting pregnant on purpose. my dad said he would kill me if i got pregnant but i know he would just be pissed. my mom is understanding and we are close. she is there for me no matter what. i am mexican and our family believes that when you get pregnant you have to keep it. no abortion or adoption. so that makes me happy. i dont believe in abortion anyways.

well i need some help. should i get pregnant or is it just not the best thing to do? i hate my father and my parents are going to get divorced. my dad would be better about the situation later on.

i really want a baby. i love kids. please give me some advice.
thank you.

You are not understanding of the fact that a baby doesn't love you, they don't have the capacity to make you happy. They are separate tiny humans that require 24/7 care. After staying up for days on end with little sleep from a crying or sick baby you'd learn the hard way that deciding to have a baby at the age of 16 is a huge mistake. I had my first at 18... I learned the hard way. Don't make that mistake!

lover gurl · Jul 15, 2008, 10:19 PM

Just to let you guys know, I have looked into some babysitting jobs and there are some around where I live. I hope to get started soon. I'll let you know how the babysitting is going. Thanks again.

Sincerely,
Lover Girl
Amanda Coogle

Alty · Jul 15, 2008, 10:26 PM

Originally Posted by the3littlegirls

You are not understanding of the fact that a baby doesn't love you, they don't have the capacity to make you happy. They are separate tiny humans that require 24/7 care. After staying up for days on end with little sleep from a crying or sick baby you'd learn the hard way that deciding to have a baby at the age of 16 is a huge mistake. I had my first at 18...I learned the hard way. Don't make that mistake!

Please read all the prior posts before posting. It is not wise to post without all the information at hand. This situation has been resolved.

Thank you.

Alty · Jul 15, 2008, 10:28 PM

Originally Posted by lover gurl

Just to let you guys know, I have looked into some babysitting jobs and there are some around where I live. I hope to get started soon. I'll let you know how the babysitting is going. Thanks again.

Sincerely,
Lover Gurl
Amanda Coogle

That's great, I can't wait to hear how it goes. :) Babysitting is a great way to get first hand experience with kids and make some extra money too. I think you'll really enjoy it. :)

bgentle02 · Aug 2, 2008, 01:12 AM

I am not a parent yet, but I have done a lot of babysitting. I also want to have children I am married and me and my husband are not able to have children naturally. Although I am in college and am 8 years older than you. Even after I get done babysitting I need a break! It is a full time job that requires a lot of financial support. Something you may not be ready for yet. As bad as I want a child I know I have to wait to adopt or do fertility treatment until I am out of school because I know it is best for the child. You really need to decide if you are ready to give up all of your fun times to deticate everything to that child. Something that you will not get back at your age! Those times when you can be carefree. Enjoy it! It only gets harder!

bgentle02 · Aug 2, 2008, 01:24 AM

Originally Posted by lover gurl

hi. my name is amanda and i am 16 years old. i have a boyfriend that is 18 and already people have a problem with that because of our ages. well i want a baby really bad and i'm thinking of getting pregnant on purpose. my dad said he would kill me if i got pregnant but i know he would just be pissed. my mom is understanding and we are close. she is there for me no matter what. i am mexican and our family believes that when you get pregnant you have to keep it. no abortion or adoption. so that makes me happy. i dont believe in abortion anyways.

well i need some help. should i get pregnant or is it just not the best thing to do? i hate my father and my parents are going to get divorced. my dad would be better about the situation later on.

i really want a baby. i love kids. please give me some advice.
thank you.

I just read the last of the conversation that was had between lover girl and the other users. I have to say we have to give her some credit for having the guts to even looking for suggestions. I know some teens would just act first then ask questions later. At least she knew to ask questions first before getting herself in trouble. And even more for listening to them! Also... all users I think everyone did a great job maybe helping this young girls future.

babygirl1092 · Aug 2, 2008, 11:31 AM

I had my first baby at 16, and it was the hardest thing I ever did, I had to give up so much stuff, I gave up my friends who promised to be there and help me, and they slowly stopped coming around and me and my new boyfriend at the time raised my daugther and his son, we stuggled a lot we had two kids in dipers and on fomula, and now my daugther is going to be 2 and our son is going to be 3, and we are pregnant again with twins. I know we may stuggle again but we are ready. We have bought a house and we both have cars, and we are able to pay for our bills and food and childcare, and clothes and any thing our kids need, and it is a very hard life to live as teen parents and I would recamend it to any one who could advoid the situation.

Alty · Aug 2, 2008, 11:44 AM

Originally Posted by babygirl1092

I had my first baby at 16, and it was the hardest thing I ever did, I had to give up so much stuff, I gave up my friends who promised to be there and help me, and they slowly stopped coming around and me and my new bf at the time raised my daugther and his son, we stuggled a lot we had two kids in dipers and on fomula, and now my daugther is going to be 2 and our son is going to be 3, and we are pregnant again with twins. I know we may stuggle again but we are ready. We have bought a house and we both have cars, and we are able to pay for our bills and food and childcare, and clothes and any thing our kids need, and it is a very hard life to live as teen parents and I would recamend it to any one who could advoid the situation.

You are the exception, not the norm. I'm so glad that you made it work, you sound like a very mature young person and a wonderful mother.

babygirl1092 · Aug 2, 2008, 12:04 PM

Thank u very much, but it did take a lot to become the mother I am today, I stuggled a lot and lost a lot, I was a very popular cheerleader and I played sports, but after I became pregnant I lost all of that I lost my teen years to be a mother, and I really would do it all over again but I wouldn't tell any one to do it just because they think they want a baby, it surely wasn't walking around showing off this beautiful baby girl, it was sleep less nights and a lot of stuggles.

trying4babykirk · Aug 3, 2008, 12:38 PM

Wow, you are super super young and in my opionion to young for a baby, but that's just my opionion. Look into volunteering at a Children's or women's shelter, YES I said volunteering, you don't get paid for it just like you don't get paid for having a baby! Also a baby cost A lot one box of diapers is $20 that probably won't last a week so approx. $100 just in diapers a month, the you need rash cream, wipes, powder and that's all just the lower half!! One can of formula cost $20 and you will need at least 2 per week! $160 just for formula, then the baby needs toys, clothes, a house, a/c, heater, water, all those things cost money too and what about a nursery at least $300... I know your thinking well I';ll have a baby shower but you don't get showers every time you need something!!

You really really need to think about having a baby! What does your boyfriend say?

Alty · Aug 3, 2008, 02:49 PM

Originally Posted by trying4babykirk

Wow, you are super super young and in my opionion to young for a baby, but thats just my opionion. Look into volunteering at a Childrens or womens shelter, YES i said volunteering, you dont get paid for it just like you dont get paid for having a baby! Also a baby cost ALOT one box of diapers is $20 that probably wont last a week so approx. $100 just in diapers a month, the you need rash cream, wipes, powder and thats all just the lower half!!! One can of formula cost $20 and you will need at least 2 per week! $160 just for formula, then the baby needs toys, clothes, a house, a/c, heater, water, all those things cost money too and what about a nursery at least $300...I know your thinking well I';ll have a baby shower but you dont get showers everytime you need something!!!!!

You really really need to think about having a baby! What does your bf say?

Please read all posts before responding, this issue has been solved.

Thank you.

lover gurl · Aug 6, 2008, 07:12 PM

Thank you Altenweg. You have been a big help and thanks to the rest of you wonderful people for giving me advice. I just wanted to let you know that I looked into babysitting and sent some emails out to a few mothers who need it. Hopefully I hear from them soon and I'll be on my way to learning motherly ways. I am excited and ready to get started. This will be a great experiment. Oh, and by the way, I caught an episode of the baby borrowers and it was really cool. That is a great way to get the parental feel for every age. I would totally do something like that but for now babysitting is what I can look forward to. Well I'm going to go for now. I'll drop in again and tell you how the babysitting is going. Thanks again to you all. Bye.

Alty · Aug 6, 2008, 07:43 PM

I'm so glad that you are looking in to babysitting. I hope that you get your first babysitting job soon and that it all goes well. I'm so glad that you are on the right track (once again I'm sounding like a mom, sorry ;))

Keep us posted, touch base with us, just let us know how you're doing, what you are doing, how it's going.

I really am proud of you, I know it's mommish, can't help it, you give me hope. :)

llamb · Aug 10, 2008, 10:32 PM

NO. You should definitely NOT have a baby at 16 on purpose. You are not ready for a child at this age. Yeah, you may think "Oh I can handle it"... Or it'll make you feel secure and happy. But, no. No way.
Babies are extremely expensive, extremely time consuming, and not always fun. Completely stressful. You cannot do it on your own.
You would have no time for you.

Why are you even asking this question if you are turning down all the amazing feedback you are getting and not listening?

Do you want a baby because you want attention?
Because that is the opposite of what will happen.

ISneezeFunny · Aug 10, 2008, 10:53 PM

llamb... read the previous posts. This issue's been resolved. It's over.

briana00josh00 · May 23, 2009, 11:20 AM

I'm 14 and pregnant your older than me so I think you got a better chance at
Making it happy I am happy about having my little girl but If it was up
To me I would go back and stay a virgin my boyfriend is 17 and he left
Me because he has bigger plans if your happy with having a baby no one can stop
U but just relize what your getting yourself into don't let other people stop u
From being happy with one you love