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mariek · Jul 25, 2008, 12:20 PM

I am new to this so I will try to ask my question with only giving you information that I think will be needed.

The bio father of my 2 year old son (almost 3) is incarcerated. He has felonies and misdemeanors for larceny, drugs, and abuse. I'm not exactly sure of everything on him now because I left him for all those reasons plus more. I believe he has only seen my son 3 or 4 times total and that is more because of the grandparents. We were never married and his name is not on the birth certificate. Also, when my son was born I gave him my last name. A couple months after my son was born I also went to a lawyer and signed papers stating that if anything happened to me then my son would go straight to my parents.

I am dating this guy and we are planning on getting married in August 2009. He is wanting to adopt my son. Can he adopt my son without the bio fathers consent? I do not believe that the bio father will consent just so he can spite me.

Thanks for any help that can be given.

ScottGem · Jul 25, 2008, 12:28 PM

In this case, the answer is a maybe. The courts will generally terminate parental rights in two circumstances. To clear the way for adoption and if the parent represents a danger to the child. It would seem you have both covered, so there is a good chance, the courts will grant the TPR and then the adoption even if he refuses.

When you have been married about a year, you need can get a lawyer and start the adoption process.

On a side note, did the lawyer who drew up those papers about your child going to your parents explain that they won't hold up to a challenge? If smething happens to you before the adoption is complete and the bio father challenges the assignment of guardianship, he would, most likely win.

mariek · Jul 25, 2008, 12:33 PM

No the lawyer failed to mention that to us. He just asked why to my parents and not to the bio father.

I have been trying to do research on this subject, but is it true that the adoption will not be able to be processed unless I am married first?

mariek · Jul 25, 2008, 12:34 PM

Also, the bio father would win even with the kind of background he has and without seeing my son except a couple times in almost 3 years?

ScottGem · Jul 25, 2008, 12:35 PM

That depends on the state you are in. In most state they will want to see you married for a period first.

And go to a different lawyer, the one who drew up those papers rooked you.

Yes, its kind ridiculous, but the bio parent would most likely win, even given his circumstances. Or the child might be temporaily placed with his parents. That's the law.