[Tisay]

My husband has a 3 year old in Missouri. He and his ex broke up during the pregnancy. He raised their baby until she was 8 months and then her mother came and said she wanted to take her for a walk. She never came back. They moved 2 hours away and filed for child support. The police told him they couldn't do anything. He didn't have enough money to hire a lawyer or go to court. Things have changed a lot since then. He moved down south with me and we're moving overseas next month. We'll be there for the next 3 years. Anyhow, my question is this: What steps should he take to eventually get unsupervised visitation (at the least) when we move back to Missouri in 3 years? Right now he's just kept records of communication between he and his ex and their child and receipts for child support payments and the holiday and birthday gifts he's gotten for her. He's also got 3 declined mediation invites from a free mediation service in Missouri and the police paperwork from when she broke into his home and stole all of his furniture and their child's belongings while he was at work (which he isn't even sure has anything to do with visitation/custody). He wants to be a part of her life, but can't afford to fly back and forth after we move. He's not too involved right now, his ex isn't letting him. But he's not a deadbeat dad.

[Fr_Chuck]

Is he currently paying child support, and what is the current legal status of the child custody. Is the child support court ordered ? And I am sorry, he is making a lot of excuses why he can't do a lot of things, no money at the time for an attorney, can't afford visits now. So for the past time lets say last 6 months how many times has he visited?
What is the court order to allow visits.

He needs to go to court and get a change in visits and/or custody agreements. But then I guess he does not have time for that right now.

[Tisay]

He's paying the child support and it is court ordered. They never went to court for custody or visitation, so the mother has full legal and physical custody. Honestly, he's only seen her once in the last 6 months. The mom got in trouble so he got temporary custody. He decided to sign it over to her grandmother through, because the police said he couldn't take her out of the county. I think he makes a lot of excuses too. His main one is that he doesn't want to deal with his ex. They dislike each other so much and used to fight in front of their daughter all the time. He's been thinking of the future lately and wants to start making things better. I'm upset with him for not taking stronger actions from the start, but it's his choice, not mine. I'm just asking because I love him and my step daughter.