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Shaballo · Mar 22, 2008, 11:37 PM

What do I do if I have to tel my girlfriend something that is so important that it would make or break our relationship. I love her so much that I can't seem too tell her. Does that sound strange. I need too know I am lost in a sea on my own thoughts. Should I write her a letter or just come start with it.

ihatewestseneca · Mar 22, 2008, 11:43 PM

What do you want to tell her?

talaniman · Mar 24, 2008, 05:09 PM

Face to face, and just tell her

Alty · Mar 24, 2008, 05:11 PM

Tell her, she has a right to know.

dragnlady5 · Mar 24, 2008, 05:19 PM

What ever it is if you don't tell her you will always have it hanging over your head, The guilt of lying by omission will eat at you and eventually it will affect your relationship. Be honest what ever it is. (must be big if you can't tell strangers) Tell her face to face not in a letter that is cold and seemingly uncaring. It is also the cowards way out. Be a man tell her face to face. She might surprise you :)

HistorianChick · Mar 25, 2008, 11:03 AM

Never write a letter when you can talk to someone face to face. Trust her by giving her the respect that she deserves.

When you do decide to tell her, be completely honest. Don't omit things to make yourself look better or to sugar coat the facts in an effort of preserving your relationship. Lay it out before her in person and trust her to make the right decision.

Shaballo · Mar 27, 2008, 07:56 PM

Originally Posted by Shaballo

What do i do if i have to tel my girlfriend something that is so important that it would make or break our relationship. i love her soo much that i can't seem too tell her. does that sound strange. i need too know i am lost in a sea on my own thoughts. should i write her a letter or just come start out with it.

I did tell her, face to face. It was hard, I am just worried that we have grown apart. She loves me but I don't think that it will ever be the same. I should have told her 7 months ago. How do I know when it is time too say goodbye. I think that she would be better off.

ihatewestseneca · Mar 27, 2008, 08:54 PM

The sooner the better.

Handyman2007 · Mar 27, 2008, 09:25 PM

Talk about it to her again and find out what is going on in her head. There is one thing I realized a long time ago- We never really know what the other person is thinking and we won't if we don't ask or if they are a liar.

Shaballo · Mar 27, 2008, 10:35 PM

Originally Posted by Shaballo

What do i do if i have to tel my girlfriend something that is so important that it would make or break our relationship. i love her soo much that i can't seem too tell her. does that sound strange. i need too know i am lost in a sea on my own thoughts. should i write her a letter or just come start out with it.

I have asked what she was thinking but she always says "nothing, or I dont know" could it be possible that I was brought here to be alone. To not find someone.

ihatewestseneca · Mar 27, 2008, 10:38 PM

Don't get too down on yourself... everyone feels that way at one time or another... hell I did the other day. Think about how you met this girl... it just kind of happens. For me it happened as soon as I just got content being alone... and then bam; a "great" girl drops into my lap.

Mom of 2 · Mar 27, 2008, 10:44 PM

For one thing, you were very upfront and honest with her about what you needed to tell her. However, the fact that she cannot open up to you and do the same thing should say a lot about your relationship. By this I mean that she is apparently hiding what she feels because she says "nothing" or "I don't know" when you asked her what she was thinking. That is not fair for you. For some reason, she does not want to talk about it. Saying these two things is a coward's way out of talking about things. I wouldn't necessarily bug her about it, but you have a right to know what her thoughts are on the subject. If you cannot communicate in a relationship, then it is not a relationship worth having. Maybe give her a little time to think things through and then ask her again what she is thinking. Just know that she IS thinking something.

starbuck8 · Mar 27, 2008, 10:45 PM

First, you are anonymous here. Better advice may be given if you give us a glimpse of what she might be dealing with!

You weren't 'brought' here to be alone, but you can choose it if you'd like.

Give more info! :)

Shaballo · Mar 27, 2008, 11:01 PM

I am afraid even if you are strangers and I may never see any of you. I am still being judged. I know that that sound stupid because everone is judged. That's why I don't give info. Maybe later on when I will but for now I am keeping the 5th

Mom of 2 · Mar 27, 2008, 11:14 PM

The one thing that you have to know about this site is that NO ONE judges anyone here. We are here to offer advice. We all have feelings and fears and some people have experienced a lot of similar situations. From our experiences we are able to give advice that will hopefully help others.

Shaballo · Mar 28, 2008, 12:15 AM

I know but if I were to say what I told her then everyone would know about me.

starbuck8 · Mar 28, 2008, 12:26 AM

I'm sorry hun, and I didn't mean to make you feel bad. I was just pointing out some of the things I saw you write.

Mom of 2 is right! We don't judge you, and even if we could tell anyone, we don't know who you are! You are completely anonymous here. All I know is that you sound like you are a young man with a problem you are trying to figure out. Sometimes some of us ask questions to find out where you're coming from and what kind of help or advice we can give you. Nothing more, nothing less.

There are experts on here as well as common sense people who can try their best to help you the best they can. Don't be embarrassed OK? There have been other questions on here that are far worse, and no one judges those people either.

ihatewestseneca · Mar 28, 2008, 01:47 AM

That's why this site exists... so you can express everything you want to say without feeling judged. There really are no stupid questions/situations.

Chazzabox · Jun 18, 2008, 11:59 AM

Originally Posted by Shaballo

What do i do if i have to tel my girlfriend something that is so important that it would make or break our relationship. i love her soo much that i can't seem too tell her. does that sound strange. i need too know i am lost in a sea on my own thoughts. should i write her a letter or just come start out with it.

Just tell her or it will eat you up inside. If you love her and think it will be worth it whether she stays with you or not, at least you will rest easy knowing you did the right thing. If it's something you can truly fix (not cheating on her) without worrying her then do that instead. But don't create drama where it's not needed.