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    brittany24's Avatar
    brittany24 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    May 13, 2008, 12:37 PM
    Is this child abuse?
    I am a single working mother. Where I work is also where I live. My child's father doesn't work and sits upstairs while I work downstairs with our child. My child was throwing a fit and was making it difficult for me to help our customers so I put him in his crib so I could finish my job. His father heard him and came downstairs and was upset saying I'm a horrible mother and that this is chils abuse and that he should call CPS. My child's was in the room no longer then 10 min. and he was being checked on by me and my co-worker. Is it true that what I did was child abuse or is his father being ridiculous in his accusations??
    - brittany
    simoneaugie's Avatar
    simoneaugie Posts: 2,490, Reputation: 438
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    #2

    May 13, 2008, 12:51 PM
    You are not abusing your child. He is ignoring his responsibilities as a father. Having sex means making babies. That makes him responsible. Attacking you and causing you to doubt your abilities as a mother could be called abuse. Allowing you to work and do child care at the same time, while he does nothing is cause for guilt, his guilt.

    Tell him that his guilt for not taking responsibility for his child is not attractive. Assure him that your care of the child is more than adequate under the circumstances. Tell him to get off his lazy butt and help out. Actions speak louder than his silly attempts to make you feel guilty.
    startover22's Avatar
    startover22 Posts: 2,758, Reputation: 363
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    #3

    May 13, 2008, 12:52 PM
    I really just think you need to find someone to help you while working. He needs to be doing something other than crying in his crib. Why can't the father watch him while you work?
    To answer the question, no it isn't child abuse, but I don't think the accusations are silly either!
    ambiNanamommy's Avatar
    ambiNanamommy Posts: 9, Reputation: 2
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    #4

    May 13, 2008, 01:00 PM
    Honestly no. tough love kids got to learn it. I know its hard. If the father wasn't working why didn't he do anything other than yell at you? If he is sitting around on his butt then he has no right calling you a bad mother when you are working and he is playing.
    brittanyb24's Avatar
    brittanyb24 Posts: 8, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    May 13, 2008, 01:01 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by startover22
    I really just think you need to find someone to help you while working. He needs to be doing something other than crying in his crib. Why can't the father watch him while you work?
    To answer the question, no it isn't child abuse, but i don't think the accusations are silly either!
    His father won't watch him and won't help with anything. I pay the bills, I take care of the home, and our child. Do you really think I'm wrong for putting him in his crib for 10 min even though he was being checked on?
    candygirl098's Avatar
    candygirl098 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    May 13, 2008, 01:03 PM
    No, that is not child abuse. You can't carry a baby with you 24/7. Checking up on the baby is important.Sometimes you have to let a baby cry. Although you won't be able to always have the bby at work. It may be time for a baby sitter.
    simoneaugie's Avatar
    simoneaugie Posts: 2,490, Reputation: 438
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    #7

    May 13, 2008, 01:05 PM
    The father needs to be put on the sidewalk, with all of his belongings, for about 10 years. He is using you.
    ambiNanamommy's Avatar
    ambiNanamommy Posts: 9, Reputation: 2
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    #8

    May 13, 2008, 01:07 PM
    I agree with simoneaugie... that or make his Butt get up and do something. That's not right I wouldn't stand for that
    startover22's Avatar
    startover22 Posts: 2,758, Reputation: 363
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    #9

    May 13, 2008, 01:10 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by brittanyb24
    his father wont watch him and wont help with anything. i pay the bills, i take care of the home, and our child. do you really think im wrong for putting him in his crib for 10 min even though he was being checked on?
    No not wrong... I do not thinks it is wrong, for goodness sakes, I have done it before. The "wrong" I see here is if you have to do this all the time, then you need help with taking care of him and keeping him busy. I think the father needs to be a man and help out and if he isn't going to then you have some clear choices to make. Good luck! ;)
    holly_penyo's Avatar
    holly_penyo Posts: 81, Reputation: 11
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    #10

    May 13, 2008, 03:28 PM
    You did ablsolutely nothing wrong. In fact most peditricians will tell you that if your baby is crying and driving you crazy, it is better to put them in their crib, wich is a safe place, rather than to lose your temper and do them harm like shake them. I'm sure you are aware of shaken baby syndrome and sids
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
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    #11

    May 13, 2008, 03:30 PM
    He is a lazy moron.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
    Pets Expert
     
    #12

    May 13, 2008, 03:33 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by kp2171
    he is a lazy moron.

    KP, had to spread the rep. I couldn't have said it better. Lazy moron, and a few other choice words.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #13

    May 13, 2008, 04:30 PM
    Yes, baby needs to be up with him while you are working,

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